Venting I think I should just drop out

[Imhopeless]

Hello, it's my first post here but probably not last.

I don't even know how or what should I exactly write here but right now I'm feeling hopeless and tired.

I'm a student and honestly I can't carry on like this anymore. I'm going to rather prestigious school and as it sounds good it's horrible. Since the school I go to is one of the best in my city, the standards are disgustingly high. I'm sleepless, tired, stressed and depressed. The classes I thought I was good at I'm failing right now. Everyone is better than me at everything, I'm sick being compared to my classmates and their grades by everyone, from my parents to teachers. I know it might sound like I'm overreacting because it's just school, I need to wait for few more years and I'll be done with it yet I can't stand this anymore. Just how much more of sleepless nights do I have to go trough to finally at least not be scared I might fail?

I'm so tired of it all I actually started to think if it wasn't better to just end myself off right now.
I know my problem and my venting in general is stupid and pointless, and I should be writing essay that I have to give in tomorrow but I'm at such low place right now I just can't think of anything either way.

 

[KSZ]

I dropped out of college, and It might be one of my best decisions ever made. Since then I am stress free, and don't have to study and waste all my time, all of those sleepless nights for just to get a bad grade again and fail.

 

[IsThisEverything]

Have you tried speaking to your school about it? They might be able to put extra measures in place to help you, such as extended deadlines or more 1-1 support. Such support is actually pretty common, I saw it a lot at school and uni. This largely depends on where in the world you are and what school it is though.

 

[SVEN]

If you feel that your wanting to die is really attributable to the circumstances in which you presently find yourself, circumstances which must inevitably pass in time, maybe you should really consider whether killing yourself is your best option.
Being totally pro choice myself I'm certainly not suggesting you shouldn't consider ctb, just that it may be a very permanent solution to a temporary place you are presently enduring.
Vent all you want to in this safe place, no one is judging or condemning you, we're here because of problems of our own.

 

[hellispink]

May I ask if you are talking about university college or high school? It depends which

 

[Kit1]

Hello, it's my first post here but probably not last.

I don't even know how or what should I exactly write here but right now I'm feeling hopeless and tired.

I'm a student and honestly I can't carry on like this anymore. I'm going to rather prestigious school and as it sounds good it's horrible. Since the school I go to is one of the best in my city, the standards are disgustingly high. I'm sleepless, tired, stressed and depressed. The classes I thought I was good at I'm failing right now. Everyone is better than me at everything, I'm sick being compared to my classmates and their grades by everyone, from my parents to teachers. I know it might sound like I'm overreacting because it's just school, I need to wait for few more years and I'll be done with it yet I can't stand this anymore. Just how much more of sleepless nights do I have to go trough to finally at least not be scared I might fail?

I'm so tired of it all I actually started to think if it wasn't better to just end myself off right now.
I know my problem and my venting in general is stupid and pointless, and I should be writing essay that I have to give in tomorrow but I'm at such low place right now I just can't think of anything either way.

I am so sorry that you are going through so much pain, so many chllenges and have a question about the future ofnyour education hanging in the lurch. As you have identified, expected standards and expectations are clearly high. It might not even be am issue around your capability.., It might not be the right course, you might have other unidentified challenges such as neurodivergence and style of teaching not right for you which with support might have you back on the tracks - it could be so many things. Are you able to speak with your form tutor, a careers advisor or someone in the educational setting that you trust that you can reach out to for support - alongside a good therapist who can walk with you.

One aspect of life, eg education, does notnhave to define who we are amd there are different career paths.

I agree with Sven who stated that whilst I am also pro choice, your does feel like a temporary challenge (heartbreaking as it is) and please do use this safe space to sound out your frustrations and reach out for support. But please try and remember that there is a life beyond..,

Take care.

 

[Forever Sleep]

I think- the 'trouble' as we go to uni and start to specialise in a subject is that we may have progressed from a school or college setting where we may have been considered particularly good at that subject- near or at the top of the class. But then- at the higher levels, we're competing against multiple people who were top of their classes- so- it can feel jarring to suddenly find yourself surrounded by people at and maybe exceeding your level.

The point is though- you wouldn't have gotten on to that course in the first place if they hadn't seen potential in you. It's such a cliche but also- you can't do better than your best. You and others may have to accept that you may not be the best now. That doesn't mean you're not good though.

Plus- honestly- while it may well depend on the subject- literally only one person ever asked me what grade I got for my degree- and that was because he had gone to the same uni, had a bit of a chip on his shoulder and wanted to compare.

It has to be up to you of course but just finishing a degree shows that you can stick at something I think. But- if you have something else in mind, who's to say that won't be better? I'm not convinced my degrees helped me all that much- asides from teaching me practical skills. Personally- I probably would have been better off doing an apprenticeship.

But yeah- maybe like others have suggested- consider telling your tutors that you are struggling. Most colleges have therapists too I believe. I ended up going in my second year because I was struggling. There's no shame in asking for a bit more support. In fact- it shows initiative and that you care. Do you talk to other students much? Are they finding it difficult too? Sometimes, just teaching styles can be overly harsh I think.

 

[Praestat_Mori]

Not everyone is made for college / uni. Maybe you should consider other options for education. I wish you all the best.

 

[兎の耳]

Hello, it's my first post here but probably not last.

I don't even know how or what should I exactly write here but right now I'm feeling hopeless and tired.

I'm a student and honestly I can't carry on like this anymore. I'm going to rather prestigious school and as it sounds good it's horrible. Since the school I go to is one of the best in my city, the standards are disgustingly high. I'm sleepless, tired, stressed and depressed. The classes I thought I was good at I'm failing right now. Everyone is better than me at everything, I'm sick being compared to my classmates and their grades by everyone, from my parents to teachers. I know it might sound like I'm overreacting because it's just school, I need to wait for few more years and I'll be done with it yet I can't stand this anymore. Just how much more of sleepless nights do I have to go trough to finally at least not be scared I might fail?

I'm so tired of it all I actually started to think if it wasn't better to just end myself off right now.
I know my problem and my venting in general is stupid and pointless, and I should be writing essay that I have to give in tomorrow but I'm at such low place right now I just can't think of anything either way.

No education is worth your mental and physical health. You know your limits better than anyone else and shouldn't let other's expectations of you dictate how you live your life.

Remember, the most prestigious education or highest paying job is worthless if you are too miserable to benefit from it.

Edit: Oh, I forgot to say I love your avatar! Miku is my favorite.

 

[accountnamerequired]

I dropped out and it's been a huge regret really, just in trying to find a job that pays a livable wage. If getting your education makes you wish you were dead then it's obviously not worth it, but is there a way you could maybe transfer to a different college that's less toxic?

 

[rosenrot]

I remember being in your position too...I went through a lot of mental torture constantly comparing myself to others and doubting my abilities. I ended up doing quite well when school ended however, I've had no benefit from getting good grades Lol I'm still very much lost in life. Just try your hardest that's all you can do and just remember there are so many people who didnt do well in school but have good careers and futures ahead of them.

 

[Smelly_ballz]

I want to drop out too. College it part of the reason I want to die. The other part includes being a waste whether or not I continue college. I'll be miserable no matter if I am in school or not. It has been like this looong before college.
Your vent isn't stupid or pointless. It helps get a weight off your chest even if it is temporary. And I feel like I can relate

 

[quietwater]

Hello, it's my first post here but probably not last.

I don't even know how or what should I exactly write here but right now I'm feeling hopeless and tired.

I'm a student and honestly I can't carry on like this anymore. I'm going to rather prestigious school and as it sounds good it's horrible. Since the school I go to is one of the best in my city, the standards are disgustingly high. I'm sleepless, tired, stressed and depressed. The classes I thought I was good at I'm failing right now. Everyone is better than me at everything, I'm sick being compared to my classmates and their grades by everyone, from my parents to teachers. I know it might sound like I'm overreacting because it's just school, I need to wait for few more years and I'll be done with it yet I can't stand this anymore. Just how much more of sleepless nights do I have to go trough to finally at least not be scared I might fail?

I'm so tired of it all I actually started to think if it wasn't better to just end myself off right now.
I know my problem and my venting in general is stupid and pointless, and I should be writing essay that I have to give in tomorrow but I'm at such low place right now I just can't think of anything either way.

Hi, I went through your same experience recently, but last year too. I tried to talk with my school representatives, but nothing improved, and I dropped out a week ago or so, your venting and your problem is not stupid at all.
Just know that if you finish your "mandatory" school years, you can drop out and maybe find a job, or change school in a less prestigious one or a professional/job training one, and if you want you can graduate later on with another type of course!
I am trying to do like this and I feel a bit better, there are a lot of alternatives, and if you feel like it I can assure you that this is a possibility.
I wish you the best from here <3