C
cyanol
Looking for my place
- Nov 30, 2021
- 11
Not my own family or relatives. I was lucky enough to have loving parents, but they are in NO ways similar to me. Same with relatives. They have never understood me. I even think I might have been adopted.
I have no real friend; I know that they will eventually leave, because of who I am. And I'm not even funny.
I had a wide variety of interests such as art, game, science, medicine, philosophy... but never went deep. Every knowledge and experience is shallow. Although some parts of me are 'okay', never have been very good at one.
I know that I have psychological problems, but never found matching criteria on DSM. Not any version of it. Same with ICD, if you don't count 'unspecified'.
I struggle to interact with people, and sometimes miss social cues... but honestly, I can't stand being close to that awkward people, for example autistic ones. I figured my way of functioning is different from theirs. So what approach should I take (or suggest to a doctor) to fix myself? I don't know! As I said above.
(I assume that there are many people on here who actually have the diagnosis. Sorry for being rude. My excuse is that this is literally the only place where I can be myself)
I personally hate how my life has become, but I'm afraid that I did have some luck in my life. So neither the group of failures, nor the happy group, would I belong to.
I'm not good at being good. Nor am I good at being evil. I am disliked by both sides.
And I don't care much about my country's culture, or the other countries... Also I am fairly different from the stereotype of my race.
The only option left is dissappearing into the void. It will perfectly match my life, full of wandering.
Maybe I could belong here, on this forum...?
I have no real friend; I know that they will eventually leave, because of who I am. And I'm not even funny.
I had a wide variety of interests such as art, game, science, medicine, philosophy... but never went deep. Every knowledge and experience is shallow. Although some parts of me are 'okay', never have been very good at one.
I know that I have psychological problems, but never found matching criteria on DSM. Not any version of it. Same with ICD, if you don't count 'unspecified'.
I struggle to interact with people, and sometimes miss social cues... but honestly, I can't stand being close to that awkward people, for example autistic ones. I figured my way of functioning is different from theirs. So what approach should I take (or suggest to a doctor) to fix myself? I don't know! As I said above.
(I assume that there are many people on here who actually have the diagnosis. Sorry for being rude. My excuse is that this is literally the only place where I can be myself)
I personally hate how my life has become, but I'm afraid that I did have some luck in my life. So neither the group of failures, nor the happy group, would I belong to.
I'm not good at being good. Nor am I good at being evil. I am disliked by both sides.
And I don't care much about my country's culture, or the other countries... Also I am fairly different from the stereotype of my race.
The only option left is dissappearing into the void. It will perfectly match my life, full of wandering.
Maybe I could belong here, on this forum...?
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