I need to die but too lazy to go trough all the prep

[elzo5678]

I have SN but I still need to clear out some things I don't want to be found and write a note. It isn't even much to do, it'd only take an hour but I am so incredibly exhausted at this point it seems a monuments task. I need to die so badly, I am in so much mental anguish I cannot stand this but I am just too lazy. Maybe I am subconsciously putting it off. I'm not sure. But I can't stand to live another day and idk what to do. I guess I will sort everything tomorrow and do it early the next morning (3am so I am 8 hours fasted and no one will find me for hours).

 

[Somage]

sounds like you are not ready bro, call a friend and ride out a few more days see how it goes x

 

[elzo5678]

sounds like you are not ready bro, call a friend and ride out a few more days see how it goes x

I'm in too much pain :((

 

[Somage]

If its physical pain man i wish i could help but obviously i cannot, if you need to talk i am here x

 

[orlandom]

I'm in too much pain :((

I felt the same way. It just lets go after a while.

But I didn't give up on my bus.

Just try to wait, don't be impulsive. Get some rest?

---

What helps you?

Antidepressants?

Alcohol helps me, even though it's harmful.

 

[blahblahhh]

I understand the anguish and everything seeming momentous. I have similar affairs to put into place so I can go but have thought it is subconscious fear and putting it off as well. You'll know when you are absolutely ready. Try and see if you can hold off and break up the things you need to do in very small amounts—try not to look at it all at once. Then you can ease your mind from your external obligations and go when you're definitely ready. Try to do the final things you need to do nice and slow.

 

[WornOutLife]

No need to rush.
When you feel really overwhelmed, you'll just go for it.

At least that's what happened to me. I'm really lazy but last year, there was a day on which I had had enough and tried to ctb.

Just take your time and try to organize your stuff. The hardest part has already been already done; getting your SN.

 

[orlandom]

No need to rush.
When you feel really overwhelmed, you'll just go for it.

At least that's what happened to me. I'm really lazy but last year, there was a day on which I had had enough and tried to ctb.

Just take your time and try to organize your stuff. The hardest part has already been already done; getting your SN.

I wondered. Do you regret that attempt?

 

[hahabye]

I felt the same way, but I started small (doing really easy things) and it motivated me to do more and more. Maybe try doing the least difficult thing and see how it goes from there?

 

[orlandom]

I felt the same way, but I started small (doing really easy things) and it motivated me to do more and more. Maybe try doing the least difficult thing and see how it goes from there?

How are you feeling now?

---

I want to know too much sorry

 

[hahabye]

How are you feeling now?

Much calmer since I crossed many things off my list. It feels go to know that I am almost entirely ready to go.

 

[WornOutLife]

I wondered. Do you regret that attempt?

Yess, I do!

I shouldn't have been so impulsive.

My mistake made me live in hell for 6 months. (2 days in a coma, 1 month in hospital, and 5 months in my parents house).

That's why I'll have a proper plan next time. I can't fail again.
Otherwise, I will just end up in a psych ward and go crazy for real lol

 

[M.M]

Don't think you are ready. Perhaps it's best to rethink it or throw out the stuff.
If you really think you are ready but you still feel drained, you could perhaps get hold of some upper to aid you.

 

[LastFlowers]

I relate to what you're saying but I'm definitely more than ready for this to be over, I've just got way over an hour's worth of preparation left to accomplish, so it's very daunting, and as you said, there is not much energy to be had in such a miserable situation. I don't think it's laziness, just pure exhaustion and fatigue. Plus, we get no support in the end so we have to do everything ourselves. I wish we had a giant red button to take care of everything and just reduce our anxiety and focus to the actual process of dying, which is also not easy, even when it is logically the better choice vs living in absolute torture.

 

[Lost Magic]

Yep, I need to get my affairs in order too. Even though I am doing self improvement type stuff, it is mostly just to distract me for the time being. I would rather do constructive things than destructive things. Haha, sounds a bit silly considering I will at some point end it all anyway. I figure if I am checking out of this life I may as well do some cool shit beforehand. Some of you should get a bucket list in order. Even if there is only a couple of things on it you will have some mini goals to keep your brain occupied. I mean every human is actively dying anyway. Nobody gets out alive. Be as well getting a few rewards before the end, no?