Nutmeg

Nutmeg

Maybe I ate all the marshmallows, maybe I didn't.
Aug 16, 2020
48
I'VE HAD ENOUGH. HOW CAN I KEEP GOING MY DAYS ARE SPENT WORRYING AND WORRYING AND WORRYING. SOME DAYS IT EVEN MAKES ME PHYSICALLY SICK. ON TOP OF THIS I'VE BEEN BULLIED BY ALMOST EVERYONE ALL MY LIFE.
I SPEND 16 HOURS A DAY WORRYING AND IT'S TOO EMOTIONALLY DRAINING.
ALL I WANT IS TO LEAVE THIS WORLD WHATEVER WAY IT IS.
 
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ladolcemorte

ladolcemorte

Experienced
May 5, 2019
286
I can definitely relate to this. Constantly worrying about money and my career (or lack thereof). Meanwhile nothing gets better.

Do you want to tell us what you are worried about?
 
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Nutmeg

Nutmeg

Maybe I ate all the marshmallows, maybe I didn't.
Aug 16, 2020
48
I can definitely relate to this. Constantly worrying about money and my career (or lack thereof). Meanwhile nothing gets better.

Do you want to tell us what you are worried about?
Day and night I am worrying about the future and what my enemies are planning to do to me.
 
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BPD Barbie

BPD Barbie

Visionary
Dec 1, 2019
2,361
I can relate, I worry about worrying about worrying. It just consumes most of my thoughts.
 
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T

TimeToBiteTheDust

Visionary
Nov 7, 2019
2,322
Same. I can't take it. I'm in deepest I could ever be.
 
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N

noaccount

Enlightened
Oct 26, 2019
1,099
You deserve to be able to rest. I'm sorry.
 
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Sprite_Geist

Sprite_Geist

NULL
May 27, 2020
1,586
It's your life to do with it as you wish, and as others have said you deserve rest, but it just sucks that you want to die because of the way others (enemies) are treating you. It's enraging when you see some folks going out of their way to be jerks for no reason. You inner thoughts are screaming: "Why can't you just leave me alone?!?"
 
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albino_elk

albino_elk

im infj with bpd=dysfunctional trash
Aug 25, 2020
233
Even eternal rest becomes boring in a few bilion years.
 
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mr.smileysad

mr.smileysad

Student
Aug 29, 2020
180
Even eternal rest becomes boring in a few bilion years.

I've been thinking about this they say that whatever afterlife is supposed to leave you eternally satisfied but I can't see how
Day and night I am worrying about the future and what my enemies are planning to do to me]

what are these enemies going to do?
 
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albino_elk

albino_elk

im infj with bpd=dysfunctional trash
Aug 25, 2020
233
Afterlife is your belief system. imagine consciuos creativity vast and never ending. every role is cool. One character for the eternity is boring :D. I think we are the victim and the predator at the same time. Some of us chosed a role where they cant create and imagine thats why they need to drain us but who cares. life as we know is in our power and we are free to do with it whatever we like. I'm speaking like the jesus :D but im not religious.
I think eternal satisfaction is every role possible, every feeling and emotion and no boundaries for anyone and anything. I think we had bilion and more roles already , bilion bodies, we was reptilians and robots , turtles and dragons, magicians and flowers . We have so much and we are living many lives and realities now but for some reason we chosed to feel through this body . Imagine that you are stuck in eternal pleasure , eventually you will chose something else for some spice :D

This space and time is very dence so everythings manifesting so slooooowly, but when we are out of body it happens instantly. I think we can call this earth a prison but we don't know that prison is our home too. Chose a taste and an ego and here we are
in a suicide forum:D
I've been thinking about this they say that whatever afterlife is supposed to leave you eternally satisfied but I can't see how
Day and night I am worrying about the future and what my enemies are planning to do to me]

what are these enemies going to do?
Who are those enemies?:D
 
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H

Hornyaboutdeath

Member
Aug 23, 2020
68
Day and night I am worrying about the future and what my enemies are planning to do to me.
Why do you believe someone would do something to you?
 
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SipSop

SipSop

Arcanist
May 7, 2020
483
I'VE HAD ENOUGH. HOW CAN I KEEP GOING MY DAYS ARE SPENT WORRYING AND WORRYING AND WORRYING. SOME DAYS IT EVEN MAKES ME PHYSICALLY SICK. ON TOP OF THIS I'VE BEEN BULLIED BY ALMOST EVERYONE ALL MY LIFE.
I SPEND 16 HOURS A DAY WORRYING AND IT'S TOO EMOTIONALLY DRAINING.
ALL I WANT IS TO LEAVE THIS WORLD WHATEVER WAY IT IS.
Sometimes I vent on this website too. And it does tremendous good for me to see that others can relate in this.
As now, I relate to you mate. I cannot take your pain away. But the fact that I have through this kind of experience and that I relate to you in this matter might ease your pain at a emotional and mental level at least.
Do what is best for you. I write to you what I wish others would write to me.
What I can tell you us that nobody can carey your burden and knowing this you can make the decision of your life. You are responsible of it, you are in control now.
We might be weak now, but at least what we can do is to control how we end our life.
My thoughts for you.
 
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Nutmeg

Nutmeg

Maybe I ate all the marshmallows, maybe I didn't.
Aug 16, 2020
48
Why do you believe someone would do something to you?
I've been thinking about this they say that whatever afterlife is supposed to leave you eternally satisfied but I can't see how
Day and night I am worrying about the future and what my enemies are planning to do to me]

what are these enemies going to do?
I live in a quiet dangerous neighborhood and in this place if you are not like them you become their enemy and a good target to bully and hurt... I don't care what they are planning to do to me but.. at the same time I started to think about ending my life the way I want rather than the way they want. That's not the only reason I wanna die tho, I also had enough of this f*cked up/boring life.
 
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I

isthisit

Member
Aug 20, 2020
5
I can also relate. I feel like I've got the weight of the world on my shoulders.
 
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O

overcomingfear

Experienced
Sep 1, 2020
206
I live in a quiet dangerous neighborhood and in this place if you are not like them you become their enemy and a good target to bully and hurt... I don't care what they are planning to do to me but.. at the same time I started to think about ending my life the way I want rather than the way they want. That's not the only reason I wanna die tho, I also had enough of this f*cked up/boring life.
Dont get sad, get mad. Fuck em up, fight them. Don't let them pull u down
 
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albino_elk

albino_elk

im infj with bpd=dysfunctional trash
Aug 25, 2020
233
I believe that he can't fight back a gang
 
O

overcomingfear

Experienced
Sep 1, 2020
206
Move out or if u can't, kill them. Getting driven to suicide is so horrible and they gonna get away with it. Rather die in jail
 

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