Venting I miss him

[animetal]

ಠ_ಠ my gosh I miss him so so so so much, I felt I took it all for granted but I was going through so much at the time and I feel he only got a fraction of myself and not the full me and I feel so regretful of everything. I still feel he was my soulmate but I ruined it but it wasn't my fault it was the stupid circumstances I was in. I wish I didn't have all the trauma I did then I would be in a happy relationship with him, he meant everything to me and now I don't even know what to do because I feel nobody will love me as much as he did.

 

[No_Lxve]

ಠ_ಠ my gosh I miss him so so so so much, I felt I took it all for granted but I was going through so much at the time and I feel he only got a fraction of myself and not the full me and I feel so regretful of everything. I still feel he was my soulmate but I ruined it but it wasn't my fault it was the stupid circumstances I was in. I wish I didn't have all the trauma I did then I would be in a happy relationship with him, he meant everything to me and now I don't even know what to do because I feel nobody will love me as much as he did.

how long has it been since you guys broken up?

 

[Aisley]

Quality human beings are so very rare, aren't they?

 

[animetal]

how long has it been since you guys broken up?

4 months ago but I'm still not coping with it .I was dealing with past trauma during the relationship also so it was hard and I really needed a break so I could kinda refocus on everything that was going on in my life but he thought that meant I wanted to talk to other people. My brain just keeps imagining us still together even though we're over . I had called him a Few days ago and we talked and he stayed in the phone with me for like 25 minutes but he basically told me to stop calling him and that since we broke up he's been going to a lot of house shows and he said "you know what goes down" and I honestly assume the worst so now my heart is even more broken

 

[90starve]

ಠ_ಠ my gosh I miss him so so so so much, I felt I took it all for granted but I was going through so much at the time and I feel he only got a fraction of myself and not the full me and I feel so regretful of everything. I still feel he was my soulmate but I ruined it but it wasn't my fault it was the stupid circumstances I was in. I wish I didn't have all the trauma I did then I would be in a happy relationship with him, he meant everything to me and now I don't even know what to do because I feel nobody will love me as much as he did.

im so sorry you're experiencing this, it was heartbreaking to read <3

after our last fight, my boyfriend told me not to contact him again - i understand how hopeless and confusing it can feel.

sending you love :)

 

[tirednorthernsoul]

I really relate to what you're going through. Gosh, it hurts so much.

 

[JustWantOut500]

I feel this so much. Lost a girl a while back, same thing she wasn't getting me even close to my best because of all the mental struggles I was dealing with. And now just wish I had a Time Machine to go back and do everything differently. It's so tough to cope with shit like this when you're already in a mental hole.

So sorry you're dealing with this. Hope it gets better for you

 

[sheleftme1]

Going through the same thing honestly except I can't call her due to legal reasons. I was the happiest I've ever been and I let my insecurities mess me up and not truly allow me to be the better version of me. I lost the love of my life and I will never fully recover from this… ever. I'm sorry you are going through pain. It sucks so much to know that she doesn't feel the same. I haven't spoken to her since 3/3 and I'll never see her again… and what is a life without her

 

[dofogry]

Going through the same thing too. Had a relationship for 5 years. He was my first boyfriend, the first and only person i have ever loved. He showed me what love is. Suddenly he said he was bored with our relationship and left me. Its been a month and i just get worse everyday. His absence is killing me, it cant do anything. I feels like i've lost part of my body and i just cant go on with life, i cant walk, cant think straight.

I was waiting for the possibility of him regreting and coming back but that didnt happen.

The pain is too much for me thats why i bought my sn and pretend to ctb next week.

 

[animetal]

Going through the same thing honestly except I can't call her due to legal reasons. I was the happiest I've ever been and I let my insecurities mess me up and not truly allow me to be the better version of me. I lost the love of my life and I will never fully recover from this… ever. I'm sorry you are going through pain. It sucks so much to know that she doesn't feel the same. I haven't spoken to her since 3/3 and I'll never see her again… and what is a life without her

I feel the exact same way , he would always reassure me for any insecurities I had and yet I still let it get the best of me , I feel I self sabotaged in a way but there's nothing I can do to get him back and now I feel empty

 

[Kasumi]

I don't understand why you can't be friends though?
To you (and everyone else in this thread) it might not help you the same as a relationship would, but your ex partner is still someone that knows you well, someone you've been close to for a long time,.. so like... even if your relationship didn't work out, can't they at least be there for you as a friend still?
Like to talk about your problems, to meet up, do some nice things to forget about the bad things, hug you to comfort you, etc, does that not work?

I've never dated a guy before and Idk if relationships work differently with / for guys so I'm sorry if what I'm saying is unreasonable.

 

[sheleftme1]

I feel the exact same way , he would always reassure me for any insecurities I had and yet I still let it get the best of me , I feel I self sabotaged in a way but there's nothing I can do to get him back and now I feel empty

Im sorry you feel that way honestly this is the worst situation I've ever been through and I hope something changes for you because truly my life is as you said empty without her and I can't do anything about it. I hope he opens the door to your connection again… love is a hard thing for all of us and I just wonder what the point of the pain is. It shows me what I felt was real but it also shows me the life I have to live from now on will never include her and I just don't want that

 

[animetal]

I don't understand why you can't be friends though?
To you (and everyone else in this thread) it might not help you the same as a relationship would, but your ex partner is still someone that knows you well, someone you've been close to for a long time,.. so like... even if your relationship didn't work out, can't they at least be there for you as a friend still?
Like to talk about your problems, to meet up, do some nice things to forget about the bad things, hug you to comfort you, etc, does that not work?

I've never dated a guy before and Idk if relationships work differently with / for guys so I'm sorry if what I'm saying is unreasonable.

I don't think it's unreasonable at all and I even asked if we could be friends again but the thing is he kinda brushed it off and basically said he wants to move on with his life. He tried to comfort me when we were on the phone call but I don't think he wants to talk to me ever :/

 

[90starve]

I don't think it's unreasonable at all and I even asked if we could be friends again but the thing is he kinda brushed it off and basically said he wants to move on with his life. He tried to comfort me when we were on the phone call but I don't think he wants to talk to me ever :/

if this is the case, as it was with me, then i think you should respect his decision and need for space - i don't think it's unreasonable to want to still be friends. perhaps, give it a couple weeks of no contact, and pop back up with a "hey, how've you been?" message.

you may find yourself becoming more comfortable being in your own company - from my experience, i think it's always better to respect somebody when they ask for space - the last thing you want to do is scare them away!

just be patient - the hurt can pass :)

 

[Kasumi]

I don't think it's unreasonable at all and I even asked if we could be friends again but the thing is he kinda brushed it off and basically said he wants to move on with his life. He tried to comfort me when we were on the phone call but I don't think he wants to talk to me ever :/

I see, thats sad,.. Idk what happaned between you but I guess some people prefer to forget and move on to deal with it.