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oopswronglife
Elementalist
- Jun 27, 2019
- 870
I used to joke about some cruel god messing with me for kicks because things seem to go wrong so often. I am agnostic and don't really believe there is likely any deity or deities, but it's not impossible. It was always just a frustrated joke to vent about bad luck. But...it's just been happening more and more and so consistently it feels it simply cannot be random or observation bias.
Some examples of small things...everything I order arrives wrong or defective. It just seems statistically impossible I'd get the bad thing every time but I just expect it now and know I am going to have to return/exchange things and everything will be a struggle. They will claim to not get messages or some other issue. Another is whenever I go to cross a street a car will come just perfectly in time that I have to wait. There won't be another car as far as you can see but every single time when I am there one will appear. Neither of these are severe issues, small things as I said, but they are just two common examples of how "nothing ever works" that might be relatable to most people. There are larger, more important, life changing ones like how every medical treatment I have makes me worse, sometimes much worse and have literally ruined my life...how nobody ever delivers on a promise to me and usually takes that failure and turns it into an attack on me...how no matter how provably right or honest I am about anything I am ignored, blamed, and run over by liars and shit people and they always get away with it. It's so prolific I just say "of course" every time this happens. Why would it happen any differently? Why would anything good happen?
Now people like to say things like "if everyone around you is an asshole then YOU are the asshole" or "if things constantly go wrong in your life it must be you as you are the common denominator"...but I just cannot accept I am this asshole problem causing person who deserves or causes all of this. I know myself...and I know people who know me and are honest about people and life and have told me I am a good person and that lots of bad stuff HAS objectively happened to me...despite what narcissistic, victim blaming family likes to say to feel superior.
So after another day of a defective order for something I really needed, the customer service being dicks about it, a car causing me to wait literally all 5 times I crossed a road but no other cars as far as one could see. I just sat down and stared at the sunset thinking "This cannot be my life...it's too perfectly wrong. Everything I need goes bad. Everything I do gets derailed...there is always someone there to ensure that. Nothing works out. This HAS to be a fucking game, a joke, some VR prank where I am in some holotank in the 29th century or the pet of some god's spoiled child who he is torturing. It can't be this bad just by chance....again it's so PERFECTLY wrong....everything goes wrong in the most perfect way like it is the Truman show with people standing by to make sure I cannot succeed or don't go in the wrong door. Or...maybe I am just fucking insane and this is all me whilst I lay in restraints in a white room.
Some examples of small things...everything I order arrives wrong or defective. It just seems statistically impossible I'd get the bad thing every time but I just expect it now and know I am going to have to return/exchange things and everything will be a struggle. They will claim to not get messages or some other issue. Another is whenever I go to cross a street a car will come just perfectly in time that I have to wait. There won't be another car as far as you can see but every single time when I am there one will appear. Neither of these are severe issues, small things as I said, but they are just two common examples of how "nothing ever works" that might be relatable to most people. There are larger, more important, life changing ones like how every medical treatment I have makes me worse, sometimes much worse and have literally ruined my life...how nobody ever delivers on a promise to me and usually takes that failure and turns it into an attack on me...how no matter how provably right or honest I am about anything I am ignored, blamed, and run over by liars and shit people and they always get away with it. It's so prolific I just say "of course" every time this happens. Why would it happen any differently? Why would anything good happen?
Now people like to say things like "if everyone around you is an asshole then YOU are the asshole" or "if things constantly go wrong in your life it must be you as you are the common denominator"...but I just cannot accept I am this asshole problem causing person who deserves or causes all of this. I know myself...and I know people who know me and are honest about people and life and have told me I am a good person and that lots of bad stuff HAS objectively happened to me...despite what narcissistic, victim blaming family likes to say to feel superior.
So after another day of a defective order for something I really needed, the customer service being dicks about it, a car causing me to wait literally all 5 times I crossed a road but no other cars as far as one could see. I just sat down and stared at the sunset thinking "This cannot be my life...it's too perfectly wrong. Everything I need goes bad. Everything I do gets derailed...there is always someone there to ensure that. Nothing works out. This HAS to be a fucking game, a joke, some VR prank where I am in some holotank in the 29th century or the pet of some god's spoiled child who he is torturing. It can't be this bad just by chance....again it's so PERFECTLY wrong....everything goes wrong in the most perfect way like it is the Truman show with people standing by to make sure I cannot succeed or don't go in the wrong door. Or...maybe I am just fucking insane and this is all me whilst I lay in restraints in a white room.
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