Venting I messed up my chance.

[Young]

I absolutely, tremendously, royally screwed up my biggest chance of ctb by drowning at the sea. This was a few months ago.

I was going to use the deodorant method. My mistake? Being a coward, going back home, and telling my family about it. I could be gone now...

Now I only have access to cutting (one of the worst methods). Hanging seems very unlikely cause my arteries don't cooperate. I think my neck is too thick, so shoelaces don't work. I don't have a rope nor an anchor point that's private.

I don't even have a bathub anymore so that I can drown at home. Could you believe my dumb ass luck?

I previously said that I was giving myself some time to recover and such, but really, it's difficult. Tell me if you have a similar experience.

 

[youpi]

What's the deodorant method?
Oh I guess he meant breathing in and out the deodorant to loose consciousness in the see