Story I live for my dead boyfriend

[BlueButterfly111]

I think I live for my dead boyfriend, I know it sounds weird. I always think about him while I'm at work, like it motivates me, as if I gonna come home to him, I always think about what he would've been doing, how his day has been. Like he's my only family, even though he's dead. I see spiritual signs, like angel numbers, and I think it's him sending me signs from heaven, telling me he loves me and he's thinking of me, and he's still with me. I never saw signs like angel numbers and things like that, until I was with him, until he passed away. I know it sounds delusional, but I just can't let him go, I'm always thinking about him, I don't think I'll ever stop missing him, I keep thinking that one of these days he will send me something or someone to actually live for, but until then I'll just keep thinking of him.

 

[Kamaainakupua]

I think I live for my dead boyfriend, I know it sounds weird. I always think about him while I'm at work, like it motivates me, as if I gonna come home to him, I always think about what he would've been doing, how his day has been. Like he's my only family, even though he's dead. I see spiritual signs, like angel numbers, and I think it's him sending me signs from heaven, telling me he loves me and he's thinking of me, and he's still with me.

I never saw signs like angel numbers and things like that, until I was with him, until he passed away. I know it sounds delusional, but I just can't let him go, I'm always thinking about him, I don't think I'll ever stop missing him, I keep thinking that one of these days he will send me something or someone to actually live for, but until then I'll just keep thinking of him.

As long as it doesn't impair your ability to do what you need to do, it sounds like you're processing this part of grief in a way that lessens the impact of the loss.

I still sing to my mom, now gone for three years, because it helps dull the jagged edges of old memories that cut too deeply.

As for what sounds delusional, I've been having to adjust my definition of that a lot, lately, with things going on in the world around me, and the calm and unconcerned lack of response to what seems to me unbelievable.

Thanks for sharing about this, and I hope you find (or keep) peace in your heart.