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Sadness20

Sadness20

Experienced
Nov 1, 2021
269
So first one is pain meds with alcohol.
Second one is benzos (Though i'm not sure if i can get them today.)
Third one is cable ties.
And fourth is all the other usual options: Car, train, jumping etc

Option number 5 would be admitting myself to the psych ward....
 
L

LittleJem

Visionary
Jul 3, 2019
2,665
Hope it is okay to ask you some questions in case they are supportive. My background is terrible depression for ovr twenty years, but I'm currently off my tits on weed..and feeling inspired:

Here are my questions for you?

a) How long has it been that you hav felt this way? (months/years)
b) If you want to, what are your reasons? Was there a cause or is it general misery?
c) If it's depression, how many medications have you tried? Have you tried psychedelics?

d) Have you been to psyh ward before? Would it help you? Do you like being on psych ward? Or do you want to stay safe and get some extra Benzos so you feel calmer for a bit? (psych ward has benzos)..

I've been to Psych Ward four times this year. I liked it for meeting the other inmates. It does keep you safer from CTB and the psychiatrists are annoying. But maybe could help you. You will get Benzos to calm you down so that is a plus if you want Clonzepam!

Do you feel calm enough to make any decisions or would you be better off having a benzo holiday in psych ward and then getting some clear thinking on the topic? When I feel suicidal, which is most days, all day unlss I am on weed or something else, I feel panic constantly and find it really hard to think....

BTW in the UK you can call the Samaritans and talk honestly about CTB. I do it a lot just to help me get through teh day. 116 123
 
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Sadness20

Sadness20

Experienced
Nov 1, 2021
269
Its been about 4 years, i'm now 18 years old. (I know a lot of people will say i'm too young to CTB)
I dont really have a good reason. I have traumas but they dont feel difficult enough to be the reason for suffering 4 years.
I have depression and emotional instability disorder. I dont remember how many meds i tried but its been a lot. I dont think i've tried psychedelics though.
I've been in the youth psych ward about 20 times (I'm not exaggerating) Well like you said it does help with not being able to CTB. I've been in the adult psych ward once until now. I'm probably not going to get benzos because with my disorder i'll get addicter very fast. I can't really think straight. I dont feel like i have time to make a real plan for CTB'ing before i do something impulsively.

I live in austria and i'm kind of scared to call a helpline...

And i just wanted to say, thank you for talking to me
 
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Zegers

Zegers

Enlightened
Dec 15, 2021
1,758
The sixth option would be better, SN, you can check SN MEGATHREAD
 
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Zegers

Zegers

Enlightened
Dec 15, 2021
1,758
I've heard of SN yea. Is it easy to get? Can i get it today?
under the new restriction i think you have to be at least 21, but there are other sources or you can also use someone ID
 
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supermlarit

supermlarit

Member
Oct 15, 2022
10
First and second options don't seem reliable.
 
Altvtysp

Altvtysp

Member
Nov 5, 2022
96
So first one is pain meds with alcohol.
Second one is benzos (Though i'm not sure if i can get them today.)
Third one is cable ties.
And fourth is all the other usual options: Car, train, jumping etc

Option number 5 would be admitting myself to the psych ward....
The first one is extremely unlikely to work unless you have a massive amount of a strong narcotic. The second one will fail its basically impossible to overdose on benzos. The third one cable ties? Very unlikely but maybe slightly if you have a cable tie mechanism/device to close them with pressure. Fourth one? Car? Kind of messed up to put others at risk and even if you crash it alone the survival rate is pretty good. Train? Kudos if you have the guts to do that pretty unfair to the train conductor and those you pick up your body parts. Jumping? Unless you have a really solid spot all kinds of things could get wrong here and would take as much balls as standing in front of a train.

You didn't mention hanging which is what I'm going to do next. If executed correctly it's almost as lethal as a gun.

If you haven't been to a psych ward please go and tell them these feelings and spend up to 3 days at one. They'll put you on psych meds or adjust the ones you're on and send you on your way. If you've been to them before and know how useless and unpleasant they are I don't know what to suggest.
 
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👁️👃👁️

Enlightened
Aug 14, 2022
1,292
Well since you even mentioned the last option of course I'm going to suggest the last option, But ultimately at the end of the day it's your choice.
 
A

Amccorm2

Member
Nov 7, 2022
46
Out of interest, what would your preferred option be?

I've got 3 options available at all times, 1 with no prep required and very high success rate so I'm hoping impulse will kick in at some point.
 
Altvtysp

Altvtysp

Member
Nov 5, 2022
96
Out of interest, what would your preferred option be?

I've got 3 options available at all times, 1 with no prep required and very high success rate so I'm hoping impulse will kick in at some point.
What are your options? I was originally debating between charcoal and detergent but have now settled on hanging. I was going to do it today but I'm gonna give myself one more day and do it around noontime tomorrow. Have the rope and practiced knots for a while just have to decide if I want to do it at home or at a spot outside. Probably will do it at home. I didn't consider one of the ingestion ones because it seems difficult to get stuff like SN and inert gas seems also too difficult to get and then build an exit bag. If I could get my hands on a strong opioid I would have preferred to overdose on that but I have no access unfortunately. I'm too much of a coward to jump or do a train.
 
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