rotten
Student
- Apr 14, 2021
- 117
Many years ago( I was around 14 or 15) during one of my mother's rampages, both me and my dad were forced to sleep outside. This was because 3 years prior to this, I messaged my already estranged sister on Facebook. My parents went snooping while I was at school and found that message. Next thing I know, 5 minutes after I walk in the front door I'm being violently abused. It went on well into the night and then started again at 4 am. By 4:30 am, I found myself sneaking into my school through a hole in the fence. It was cold, dark, and not a soul was around. Needless to say that day I didn't really pay attention in any of my classes, and obviously didn't have any homework done. This was one of the many similar instances that occurred and is one of the reasons I am extremely suicidal to this day.
During the time me and my dad were locked outside, my dad was trying to talk to me here and there. It felt like he blamed me entirely for what was happening and made up excuses for my mom such as "she just has a lot of issues she's going through". He also said something like "You had it all, now look where you're at now" Meanwhile, he had just been violently abused himself and was locked out of the house he paid for.
But the main thing he said that evening that stuck out to me the most was "If you want to have a better life you need to go to college, it's the only way out". I start thinking well why can't you do anything to stop this? He was the only one with any real power to stop this and better the both of our lives. I was barely a teenager and struggling in school due to this abuse. I feel like I don't even need to explain why what he said is so laughable.
Not too long ago, maybe like 3 months ago, I was watching the Danelle Hallan YouTube channel. She was discussing an extreme case of abuse centered around a young boy (I'll try to update with the exact case later). He suffered immensely and eventually died at the hands of his abusers. Danelle went into great detail about how his other family members were trying to help out. She stated that his biological father would talk to him quite a bit and said something like "If you want to get out of this you have to keep studying and go to college" He never even had the chance to become a teenager or graduate elementary.
That phrase again…just always rubs me the wrong way. I can understand extended family not being able to do too much, but when you're a biological parent, you need to fucking fight hard for you kid. You can't just put it all on them.
Not to mention those of us who suffer from abuse aren't always the ones accelerating at school. Not because we are stupid, far from it because we grow up quickly, but because all we can think about is how we are going to survive when we come home.
Also I'm sure there are others who can achieve many things under heinous circumstances, but everyone is different. It frustrates me just how many people don't understand this simple fact.
During the time me and my dad were locked outside, my dad was trying to talk to me here and there. It felt like he blamed me entirely for what was happening and made up excuses for my mom such as "she just has a lot of issues she's going through". He also said something like "You had it all, now look where you're at now" Meanwhile, he had just been violently abused himself and was locked out of the house he paid for.
But the main thing he said that evening that stuck out to me the most was "If you want to have a better life you need to go to college, it's the only way out". I start thinking well why can't you do anything to stop this? He was the only one with any real power to stop this and better the both of our lives. I was barely a teenager and struggling in school due to this abuse. I feel like I don't even need to explain why what he said is so laughable.
Not too long ago, maybe like 3 months ago, I was watching the Danelle Hallan YouTube channel. She was discussing an extreme case of abuse centered around a young boy (I'll try to update with the exact case later). He suffered immensely and eventually died at the hands of his abusers. Danelle went into great detail about how his other family members were trying to help out. She stated that his biological father would talk to him quite a bit and said something like "If you want to get out of this you have to keep studying and go to college" He never even had the chance to become a teenager or graduate elementary.
That phrase again…just always rubs me the wrong way. I can understand extended family not being able to do too much, but when you're a biological parent, you need to fucking fight hard for you kid. You can't just put it all on them.
Not to mention those of us who suffer from abuse aren't always the ones accelerating at school. Not because we are stupid, far from it because we grow up quickly, but because all we can think about is how we are going to survive when we come home.
Also I'm sure there are others who can achieve many things under heinous circumstances, but everyone is different. It frustrates me just how many people don't understand this simple fact.
