fated to die

fated to die

vexed
Jul 6, 2023
10
i can't catch up to my peers. they are all better than i am. better off than i am. i'm stuck in a loop and all i can think about is how i'm fucking stupid. i scratch myself until i bleed but i can't stop thinking about hitting myself over and over again. every time i drive i want to get in the opposite lane and crash into another. i can't do much. i'm going to fail college math because i don't understand any of it. i don't understand basic math. i can't count to big numbers. i can't memorize equations. i can't process any math equation. i can't comprehend math no matter how hard i try. all i can hope is that someone can give me the fucking answers and not try to teach me like im a fucking retard that's all i fucking ask but no. she wants to try and teach ME. my fiancée does not get me, she does not understand me so idk why shes trying at all. i just want fucking answers so i cna get out of this class but no i fuckign cant like when i already dont remember the equation and i sit there for 20 minutes sitting there just feeling empty and then she goes "do you just want to do somethng else?" howe about helping me fuck you fuck off go fuck yourself i hate this i hate math i hate that i feel slow and now i realize how shitty my art is and that was the one thing i thought i was good at. i thought i was good at art but im not. im not good at communicating im not good at basic skills i dont know common sense and im going to get a big fuckignn migraine because im crying im stupid im fucking stupid im so fucking stupid i cant do anything right im a failure at school and im a failure at work im a failure no matter what i do i tried and i cant do anything why do i have to suffer i wnt to fukingm kill myself i want to fucking die. im so fucking glad tantacrul decided to make a dumbass fucking video that led me here im so fucking glad im not alone. im fucking ugly. i feel insecure and fat and i hate everything. i dont care anymore im so glad there are suicide methods, it'll add to my research on hwo to kill myself
 
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