Life_and_Death
Do what's best for you 🕯️ Sometimes I'm stressed
- Jul 1, 2020
- 6,822
im not getting anywhere. anxieties and phobias. dissociation. personality disorder(s?). and my thoughts....they just dont shut up. but i cant say anything. i dont even know what to say. and lately everyone has been noticing something wrong with me. typically when i get a message or someone talks to me i answer right away or as soon as i can. i just dont care anymore. my disorders are wearing me out, always pointing out what is wrong.
but......i just cant figure it out. if they are my own thoughts why cant i just make them stop. why wont they go away. they just keep talking and talking. i cant escape them. and the dissociation keeps me inside myself. there is no "reality" just me and my thoughts. and my personality disorder has them all over the place. i cant think straight for even a second. and if i try to change the topic of my thoughts is just gets worse.
and the worse part....none of this is real. my disorders dont exist. but they must because i cant control them. which just leaves me feeling like shit for ever saying anything but i need to get these thoughts out they are killing me. but they arent real so im lying, just looking for attention. but again....they have to be real......dont they?
i feel like ive gone insane and it's too late
but......i just cant figure it out. if they are my own thoughts why cant i just make them stop. why wont they go away. they just keep talking and talking. i cant escape them. and the dissociation keeps me inside myself. there is no "reality" just me and my thoughts. and my personality disorder has them all over the place. i cant think straight for even a second. and if i try to change the topic of my thoughts is just gets worse.
and the worse part....none of this is real. my disorders dont exist. but they must because i cant control them. which just leaves me feeling like shit for ever saying anything but i need to get these thoughts out they are killing me. but they arent real so im lying, just looking for attention. but again....they have to be real......dont they?
i feel like ive gone insane and it's too late