Venting I genuinely want life to stop

[WonderingSoul]

I hear people often say that suicidal people don't actually want to die, they just want their pain to end. I think that's partly true, but when I think about all the responsibilities to bear and trauma that I have to heal if I were to choose life, it just doesn't feel worth it. A part of me wants live life, but a larger part of me doesn't want to because I know the amount of ungodly work that I have to go through. Whats worse is that possibly that people won't treat you with much kindness if you choose life. I'm not saying I'm obligated kindness by others, but it's just weird how if CTB succeeds for you, many people around you might end getting very sad from it, but if it fails, nobody will really change much. That is at least my experience though.

 

[CaineNumbsPain]

Honestly, yeah, that's accurate.

 

[Forever Sleep]

That statement kind of annoys me. I agree- it probably is true for some people. That doesn't mean it's practical or achieveable in all cases. I think people choose suicide because it seems like the lesser of the evils. They may not 'want' to die specifically but it's obvious they don't want to live under their current circumstances. Clearly- they haven't been successful in changing those circumstances and they can't envisage how they could- otherwise- they'd be doing that! So- while I guess they think that statement is supposed to just make things click for us- it doesn't! They should be looking at why that person is suicidal and- how difficult will it be to solve those problems? Some theoretical conversation on existentialism isn't going to help!

Practicality wise- some people find their circumstances incredibly difficult to change yet- it does feel like they're downplaying it: 'No- you don't really want to die- you just want your life to be better.' Life is a crapshoot though. Even if we do put in massive amounts of effort- doesn't mean we'll automatically be rewarded. They may be willing to accept that but- we probably aren't by this stage.

To me- it's like the lottery. Most people I imagine would say their lives would be easier with more money- so- I'd argue- there's your glittering chance for happiness! Why aren't you putting all your life savings in it? Because that would be dumb- obviously. It's a game with tiny odds of winning. Life can start to look like that too! Why would we want to invest so much of ourselves for so little reward? Sure- some of us would happily live granted a magic wand or a gennie in a bottle. Things don't magically get better though.

I'd liken it to the story of the mountaineer, Aron Ralston. WARNING! THIS IS DISTURBING AND GRAPHIC! He trapped his arm while canyoning and after 5 days, ended up amputating it himself in order to escape. Did he want to amputate his arm? Did he wake up one day and decide to do it? No- of course not. He did it to escape from a more terrible situation. He did it to live. People don't always choose to CTB because they have some facination with death. They probably just want to escape too- but- unless these pro-lifers can come up with a better option for each person- they really shouldn't be surprised when death looks preferable.

 

[WonderingSoul]

They should be looking at why that person is suicidal and- how difficult will it be to solve those problems? Some theoretical conversation on existentialism isn't going to help!

Exactlyy !

 

[just_a_guy]

I think in the future living in a VR world will present a third option, not death but not the life we know. Just you sitting with a feeding tube and a bucket under your gaming chair so you can take a shit, and the constant glow of your perfect world.

 

[FuneralCry]

It's understandable just wishing to be free from all the suffering that existing brings. But honestly it makes little sense to me when people say all suicidal people don't really want to die as this doesn't apply to everyone. People cannot make statements like that about people they are unable to experience existence in the same way as, in my case I only wish to eternally cease existing.

 

[Hotsackage]

Yes there is no real solution for people like us, with severe challenges who want to at least attempt to live. Most of us can't hold down jobs and are relying on other avenues for income. Society, in general doesn't know how to deal with it. At this point, we have to find our own way to pursue our goals, aspirations etc.