I found a gun...

[MindFrog]

I didn't think i find my father's gun but he's careless like that. Just putting it in his side bag.

It' s quite heavy. It put the nozzle on my forehead.

....

I don' t know why I can't pull the trigger. I hate this. I already have a chance and blew it. It' s probably hidden somewhere else now.

I'm such a coward.

 

[TAW122]

I didn't think i find my father's gun but he's careless like that. Just putting it in his side bag.

It' s quite heavy. It put the nozzle on my forehead.

....

I don' t know why I can't pull the trigger. I hate this. I already have a chance and blew it. It' s probably hidden somewhere else now.

I'm such a coward.

The survival instinct is quite powerful and it is no surprise how it may impede one's willingness to CTB. I hope you are able to find peace with whatever other method you may come across.

 

[MindFrog]

The survival instinct is quite powerful and it is no surprise how it may impede one's willingness to CTB. I hope you are able to find peace with whatever other method you may come across.

Yeah i guess. It didnt help that I'm near people that time. I wish I can just end it on my terms without shame or the risk of resuscitation.

Thank you for your kind words.