Venting I feel so gross

[dra1ncoreslwt]

not really an update of my overall situation or as of why I haven't ctb'd, just a sudden vent because I don't know elsewhere to let it out and I genuinely feel so fucking gross.

now and for the last year I haven't had a washing machine so I often have to wash my own clothes and bed sheets, however I have a small space in my bathroom to hang them to dry so they often take long if I don't wash them early in the morning and end up smelling like humidity, that happened with some of my clothes so I've used the same outfit for like 2 weeks to bed and day bc I hadn't had motivation to wash again, anyways weather is really hot and I've been feeling really grossed out with myself on top of all the physical pain I've been going through, trying to distract myself emotionally with my partner's comfort yet in the end of the day when I go to sleep I feel so so so uncomfortable, uneasy anxious and nauseous, I don't know what to do about it and it's been really stressful because I can't get myself to "just wash them" and I'm too broke to go to a laundry place, and im not administering money first hand. anyways I'm trying not to break down crying at any time because it's becoming unbearable

 

[Wormfood]

It's okay. I go through this too. It was hell getting me to shower today. My laundry is piling up and I have to wash them by hand. I'm just living moment by moment. You're not alone

 

[FuneralCry]

That sounds like a really awful and tiring situation to be trapped in, but anyway I wish you the best. There certainly does seem to be no real relief from suffering in this cruel world.

 

[strawberryjampan]

not really an update of my overall situation or as of why I haven't ctb'd, just a sudden vent because I don't know elsewhere to let it out and I genuinely feel so fucking gross.

now and for the last year I haven't had a washing machine so I often have to wash my own clothes and bed sheets, however I have a small space in my bathroom to hang them to dry so they often take long if I don't wash them early in the morning and end up smelling like humidity, that happened with some of my clothes so I've used the same outfit for like 2 weeks to bed and day bc I hadn't had motivation to wash again, anyways weather is really hot and I've been feeling really grossed out with myself on top of all the physical pain I've been going through, trying to distract myself emotionally with my partner's comfort yet in the end of the day when I go to sleep I feel so so so uncomfortable, uneasy anxious and nauseous, I don't know what to do about it and it's been really stressful because I can't get myself to "just wash them" and I'm too broke to go to a laundry place, and im not administering money first hand. anyways I'm trying not to break down crying at any time because it's becoming unbearable

I have gross plaque psoriasis over my body. I can't show my arms because they're covered in gross scaly red patches, the same with my legs and torso. I'm pretty much a leper. So yeah, I understand. Whenever I confront this fact I realize I should just die soon. I used to be able to use creams to make it better but none work any more and I am just utterly disgusting.

 

[downndone2]

I'm terrible about laundry. I do it when it has to be done. Started new job today, so I've got to do it at least twice a week probably. I was having a hard time showering but obviouslybim going to have to...
I hate the way depression, anxiety, and pain really fuck up life on top of everything else

 

[dra1ncoreslwt]

I'm terrible about laundry. I do it when it has to be done. Started new job today, so I've got to do it at least twice a week probably. I was having a hard time showering but obviouslybim going to have to...
I hate the way depression, anxiety, and pain really fuck up life on top of everything else

yeah, it's just frustrating to me of how hard it is to even wash my clothes, i think I'd feel much better if I could throw them in the washing machine but i have to wash in the literal shower floor bc i don't have any other place to wash so it's so hard tiring and doesn't even clean properly, wish u luck on that laundry pile though :(