BlueButterfly111
Member
- Dec 26, 2024
- 35
I feel like him passing has given me the strength and courage to finally end my life. Ever since I met him, I stopped desperately trying to search for someone to love me because he was and is my true soulmate in this lifetime. I feel like both of us were meant to be in each others lives so that we could finally experience true romantic love before our deaths.
One of the last conversations we had, he told me he tries not to tell me about how much he loves me because he gave someone his heart and they didn't deserve it. I told him that he can give me his beautiful heart, and I feel like he did.
I've been depressed my whole life, but his death really broke my heart. And when I think about ctb now I feel complete because all I ever wanted was to be loved, and I finally got to experience it in such a perfect way. Like my soul contract or mission is over and I experienced everything I was supposed to in this lifetime. I am absolutely not gonna be able to live with the pain of his death for years to come. It's over for me, and no one can convince me otherwise.
I do hope I get to see him again in death, if he truly is my soulmate or twin soul I think it would be impossible not to. And I just think about how in a lot of ways, he has restored my spirituality with everything that happened with him passing. (I'm not religious but I'm an agnostic spiritualist.)
He made me believe in love, in soulmates. I had a dream about him passing away a few months before he passed away, I feel like that can't be a coincidence. Also, ever since he passed I started paying more attention to the clouds and the sky, I didn't know why I was doing it. I saw a cloud shaped just like a teddy bear that was beaming with light around it. His sister saw the photo I took and she said it was him sending me a gift, a teddy bear, and I believe that.
I know I make a lot of posts about him, but I just happen to think about him a lot and sometimes want to get my thoughts out, since I have no one else to talk to about it. I feel like he truly set me free, since I feel like I was never meant for this life anyway.
One of the last conversations we had, he told me he tries not to tell me about how much he loves me because he gave someone his heart and they didn't deserve it. I told him that he can give me his beautiful heart, and I feel like he did.
I've been depressed my whole life, but his death really broke my heart. And when I think about ctb now I feel complete because all I ever wanted was to be loved, and I finally got to experience it in such a perfect way. Like my soul contract or mission is over and I experienced everything I was supposed to in this lifetime. I am absolutely not gonna be able to live with the pain of his death for years to come. It's over for me, and no one can convince me otherwise.
I do hope I get to see him again in death, if he truly is my soulmate or twin soul I think it would be impossible not to. And I just think about how in a lot of ways, he has restored my spirituality with everything that happened with him passing. (I'm not religious but I'm an agnostic spiritualist.)
He made me believe in love, in soulmates. I had a dream about him passing away a few months before he passed away, I feel like that can't be a coincidence. Also, ever since he passed I started paying more attention to the clouds and the sky, I didn't know why I was doing it. I saw a cloud shaped just like a teddy bear that was beaming with light around it. His sister saw the photo I took and she said it was him sending me a gift, a teddy bear, and I believe that.
I know I make a lot of posts about him, but I just happen to think about him a lot and sometimes want to get my thoughts out, since I have no one else to talk to about it. I feel like he truly set me free, since I feel like I was never meant for this life anyway.
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