Venting I feel like I don't exist

[whenaprilfadesaway]

Hello, everyone. I'm 23 and live in Brazil. Trying to find a way to ctb as quick as possible.

I feel like I don't exist. Does anybody feel the same?
Like, I don't have any dreams, big ambitions or big wishes. Ever since I was a kid my only dream was to be happy but I failed.
I don't know how to love. I mold myself by the people who pass through my life and not by who I really am because I don't know who I am. I become dependent. I feel empty. I feel flawed and useless. I feel like a secondary character in my own story. And it kind of hurts to see people happy, not being able to be like them, have a job or go to college, have friends and go out to bars to drink and have great times. I feel trapped in my own existence. I feel inferior to everyone. But this will end, I need to be strong at least for that.

 

[Darkover]

i feel like i don't exist because you really don't exist for very long your just a temporary structure in an uncaring universe soon to be gone for all time

 

[dreamfyre]

damn bro, i relate so much to this; like youre in my mind. ive felt the same for a long time and feel like i need radical change