I feel like I am addicted to this site, and I am scared

[Water-Lily]

As some of you may have read my post from earlier, my mental state is shit. But that is to be expected of course

I was shocked to see my father actively looking into the resources I followed for my brother. Made me happy to see something happening on his end

We spent some time shopping and talked about abuse, my mom, etc. Reminds me that he has not always seen the full picture of the abuse and he genuinely didn't know how she hurt me

My brother is, well, you guys know. He's an ass. Bossing around my father and creating fights. Though I didn't fight with him…yet

And now I am back here. After convincing myself that I need to leave SS for about a week, I can't. I depend on this place. I am attached to it, and I don't like it.

I am not bashing on SS or anything. But sometimes I wish I could listen to my feelings and stay off this site for a certain period of time.

I am so torn at the moment. Torn, stressed, and tired. Just…..alone. Yeah that's the feeling. Alone

Alone like on an island.

I am reminded that nobody cares. Just like how nobody cared about my mom abusing me when I spoke up, or when nobody cared about me when I reported my college sexual assault. Nobody cares

 

[signifying nothing]

Do you keep a journal? That might be a useful alternative to at least some of the posts you feel you want to make on SS.

 

[Water-Lily]

Do you keep a journal? That might be a useful alternative to at least some of the posts you feel you want to make on SS.

Thank you. Yes I actually journal everyday. That can help with the amount of posts I make here.

 

[WornOutLife]

I can relate. I'm really addicted to SS but this site is the only thing which is helping me to move on.

Reading everybody's posts is such a great experience. There's sadness, happiness, failure, progress, recoveries, addictions and so on.

Btw, I really like that journal idea which was mentioned above.

Hugs and love

 

[262653]

I have a separate journal for venting. I've projected my thinking onto others and figured that no one would be interested in venting. Isn't it basically taking a dump in front of the public? Dumping the emotional baggage onto other people, and expect them to wipe my ass with consolations.

I too feel attached to this place. It feels like an oasis of sanity, and the world is a wasteland: alien, desolate and dishonest.

 

[Good4Nothing]

I've come to depend on SS, too.
Like @Burzolog said, it's an island of sanity. I'd be so lonely without this place. I don't even interact that much, really, but just knowing I'm not alone with these feelings, with this fucked up brain and fucked up life, is comforting to me. I've found my tribe.

 

[signifying nothing]

It feels like an oasis of sanity, and the world is a wasteland: alien, desolate and dishonest.

Agreed. I think there is a lot of truth to be found here - people talking about things from the heart, from their core, the deepest parts of themselves. I don't think you find that in very many places these days.

 

[LittleBabyNothing]

Thank you. Yes I actually journal everyday. That can help with the amount of posts I make here.

i journal too. But still can say more here. i think it's because no one can hear my journal. i have the anonymity like a journal here, but i also get heard without judgement here. i have never felt heard or understood in life.

 

[WornOutLife]

I think that as long as it doesn't make you feel worse, it is great to spend your time on SS.
In my case, browsing this website most of the day has motivated me to keep on living.

People and I can understand really well each other. There is no other place in which I can vent, give advice, have fun and son like here. (reddit, you can go to hell lol)

Anyway,

Love all of you, thanks for existing and being here!

 

[GenesAndEnvironment]

Yeah, I'm addicted, so what? I'm addicted to vitamins and water, too. Praise Marquis, praise the mods for only having given me 70%, praise SS!!!

 

[kawaiiphantom]

As some of you may have read my post from earlier, my mental state is shit. But that is to be expected of course

I was shocked to see my father actively looking into the resources I followed for my brother. Made me happy to see something happening on his end

We spent some time shopping and talked about abuse, my mom, etc. Reminds me that he has not always seen the full picture of the abuse and he genuinely didn't know how she hurt me

My brother is, well, you guys know. He's an ass. Bossing around my father and creating fights. Though I didn't fight with him…yet

And now I am back here. After convincing myself that I need to leave SS for about a week, I can't. I depend on this place. I am attached to it, and I don't like it.

I am not bashing on SS or anything. But sometimes I wish I could listen to my feelings and stay off this site for a certain period of time.

I am so torn at the moment. Torn, stressed, and tired. Just…..alone. Yeah that's the feeling. Alone

Alone like on an island.

I am reminded that nobody cares. Just like how nobody cared about my mom abusing me when I spoke up, or when nobody cared about me when I reported my college sexual assault. Nobody cares

I feel that so much. I can't stay off of this site for more than a day. Especially when I self isolate. A lot of the time SS is the only place I interact with people, or feel any sense of dopamine. I try to stay positive but it's very hard. I'm so sorry youve encountered people that don't care about you. You deserve so much better than that I know this is a very old post, I hope you're doing alright

 

[mortuarymary]

It is rather addictive but for me in a good way x

 

[LifeTransit_1]

I don't really chat on here very much becuase im not that type of person to type on here 24/7. But I guess you can say im kind off addicted to SaSu becuase I do really enjoy reading what everyone has to say and what their opinions are on controversial topics.

 

[Kit1]

I am certainly addicted to the site. I joined soon after I stopped using mathematics NHS GP services and the forum replaced the support that I used to get from my GP. Now that my therapy sessions has ended - it feels like I am stuck here as I feel heard and understood and is probably one of the tools that keeps me aline now.