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wasteofspace22

Member
Aug 20, 2022
66
I'm such a coward I let my life get worse and worse at 19 and don't have the guts to just fucking kill myself. I wish I was never fucking born
 
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jodes2

jodes2

Hello people ❤️
Aug 28, 2022
7,736
You're still young, you have plenty of chances for life to improve. Sorry you're suffering ❤️ have you thought about different methods? Method choice makes a big difference. Could you explain why you don't have the "guts" to kill yourself? I'm kind of glad, you're so young ❤️
 
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W

wasteofspace22

Member
Aug 20, 2022
66
You're still young, you have plenty of chances for life to improve. Sorry you're suffering ❤️ have you thought about different methods? Method choice makes a big difference. Could you explain why you don't have the "guts" to kill yourself? I'm kind of glad, you're so young ❤️
I just saw don't I'm a coward used to living a shit life and I'll always be that way. I doubt I'll ever have the courage to do anything worthwhile in my life
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
43,687
Suicide really can be so difficult after all. It doesn't mean that you are cowardly, feeling like you are unable to go through with it. We live in a world that makes dying as hard as possible for us. If it was easier to leave behind all the suffering I would already be gone. I also wish that I never existed at all and I know that it's so dreadful being trapped in a life that you hate. I'm sorry that you are in this situation.
 
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wasteofspace22

Member
Aug 20, 2022
66
Suicide really can be so difficult after all. It doesn't mean that you are cowardly, feeling like you are unable to go through with it. We live in a world that makes dying as hard as possible for us. If it was easier to leave behind all the suffering I would already be gone. I also wish that I never existed at all and I know that it's so dreadful being trapped in a life that you hate. I'm sorry that you are in this situation.
I started an antidepressant, hopefully that helps
 
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theboy

theboy

Illuminated
Jul 15, 2022
3,257
It's hard to beat SI
 
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SecretDissociation

SecretDissociation

Suicide enthusiast
Sep 11, 2022
394
I feel the same. The longer I live the worse it gets and the more I regret not ctb-ing. But ig I break my own expectations every month or so
 
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Tired_again

Tired_again

Member
Sep 16, 2022
12
I started an antidepressant, hopefully that helps
what kind are you taking. I took prozac a while ago and I ended up being on 40mg which looking back on it was way too high as I dont even recognize myself looking back on pictures and videos.

I just started taking bupropion a couple days ago. Not sure what to expect
 
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S

Sick of it all

It's only a matter of time and I'm running out
Aug 17, 2022
214
I totally feel this.
 
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TimetoGo!

TimetoGo!

Wizard
Aug 30, 2022
641
what kind are you taking. I took prozac a while ago and I ended up being on 40mg which looking back on it was way too high as I dont even recognize myself looking back on pictures and videos.

I just started taking bupropion a couple days ago. Not sure what to expect
Why didn't you recognise yourself? In a bad way you mean?
 
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onlyanimalsaregood

onlyanimalsaregood

Unlovable 💔 Rest in peace CommitSudoku 🤍
Mar 11, 2022
1,329
I don't know what to do with my cat
 
hamvil

hamvil

Wizard
Aug 29, 2022
650
Give it some time, you are still 19 and there are plenty of opportunities for change in the coming years, maybe also yours will arrive, maybe not, wait and see what happens. Try education if this avenue is interesting and practical for you (no idea about your country and economical conditions). Look for a job, pursue your hobbies, build meaningful friendships. Wait for love you never know when it will arrive. If all fails re-evaluate this in some years.
 
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gimzero

Student
Aug 15, 2022
148
In your age i was the same but where i live there kids in your age who do ctb mostly hanging .
 
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locked*n*loaded

locked*n*loaded

Archangel
Apr 15, 2022
8,985
Then my all means don't try it because you'll probably screw it up and end up in a far worse condition than you are now.
 
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Tired_again

Tired_again

Member
Sep 16, 2022
12
Why didn't you recognise yourself? In a bad way you mean?
I felt great at the time. But it was just an entirely different personality. Id have tons of energy, overly confident, talkative, a bit more social. Although much of what came out of could be seen as positive, looking back on it I view myself of having been an entirely different person. I wasn't me. I was taken control of by my meds. So yes in a bad way I didn't recognize myself. Maybe it just had been so long of being happy for an extended period of time that I dont understand what happiness could be like and looking back on myself being happy is abnormal to me.
 
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