Venting I feel a strong urge to have sex with a girl before I kill myself.

[farawaystar]

I think about suicide all the time. But once I decided I'm going to end things soon, my sex drive shot up. So much that I realized I really want to have sex before I go.

 

[fishperson]

Ye idk why , but my body has this strong correlation between high libido and high suicidal state.
But all it takes is one orgasm and i stop caring

 

[scoba32]

hmmm are you a virgin?

 

[sourcherry]

this is literally denji.
jokes aside idk bro maybe support a night worker then before you go?

 

[stopMotionSickness]

I mean in my limited experience, it's honestly not all that. The psychology (drive, pressure, connection) surrounding it is so so much stronger than the actual sensation. It's not just a wishy-washy truism when they say the emotional connection about it matters; it otherwise really feels like slow cooperative masturbation. But yeah idk I know words like that didn't help me much back then either, so up to you.

 

[scoba32]

I mean in my limited experience, it's honestly not all that. The psychology (drive, pressure, connection) surrounding it is so so much stronger than the actual sensation. It's not just a wishy-washy truism when they say the emotional connection about it matters; it otherwise really feels like slow cooperative masturbation. But yeah idk I know words like that didn't help me much back then either, so up to you.

maybe it wasn't the right person tho

 

[farawaystar]

hmmm are you a virgin?

I'm a man and I've only done it once.

 

[scoba32]

I'm a man and I've only done it once.

how was it? and with who?

 

[farawaystar]

this is literally denji.
jokes aside idk bro maybe support a night worker then before you go?

I just want to masturbate before I leave.

 

[scoba32]

I just want to masturbate before I leave.

nothing stopping you gang infinite porn online

 

[farawaystar]

how was it? and with who?

It was kind of good. It was with a girl who works in a hookah lounge.

 

[scoba32]

It was kind of good. It was with a girl who works in a hookah lounge.

wow that is pretty cool did you pay her or nah

 

[farawaystar]

I mean in my limited experience, it's honestly not all that. The psychology (drive, pressure, connection) surrounding it is so so much stronger than the actual sensation. It's not just a wishy-washy truism when they say the emotional connection about it matters; it otherwise really feels like slow cooperative masturbation. But yeah idk I know words like that didn't help me much back then either, so up to you.

You're right. It's not that important. But my urges keep getting stronger and I can't hold them back. I think before I end things I'll just masturbate and then go through with it.

 

[stopMotionSickness]

maybe it wasn't the right person tho

Yeah, maybe; but I'm starting to think the "right person" doesn't exist, at least not without fundamental overhauls of who I am. Funny this came up today in particular; I fell in love in a dream last night. Kinda woke up feeling extremely hollow about it because I think it made me realize I've never deeply loved anyone like that in real life, despite a couple of relationships. Best case scenario I just get comfortable around people (instead of extremely stressed). Probably on me for not meeting enough new people or something, but idk I feel pretty bad about the whole subject.

 

[scoba32]

You're right. It's not that important. But my urges keep getting stronger and I can't hold them back. I think before I end things I'll just masturbate and then go through with it.

bro it is pr important sex is one of the most basic drives of man and woman

Yeah, maybe; but I'm starting to think the "right person" doesn't exist, at least not without fundamental overhauls of who I am. Funny this came up today in particular; I fell in love in a dream last night. Kinda woke up feeling extremely hollow about it because I think it made me realize I've never deeply loved anyone like that in real life, despite a couple of relationships. Best case scenario I just get comfortable around people (instead of extremely stressed). Probably on me for not meeting enough new people or something, but idk I feel pretty bad about the whole subject.

wow that is fascinating i think a pretty good way to find people is partner dances like salsa or line dancing or whatever

 

[farawaystar]

wow that is pretty cool did you pay her or nah

No, definitely not. I've been offered sex so many times but I always said no. Honestly I'm confused by my own body. Why does my sex drive get this high right before I decide to end things? It doesn't make sense to me.

 

[scoba32]

No, definitely not. I've been offered sex so many times but I always said no. Honestly I'm confused by my own body. Why does my sex drive get this high right before I decide to end things? It doesn't make sense to me.

wow so you must be a really good looking guy huh? i think it is because sex is so distracting from all your sorrows

 

[farawaystar]

wow so you must be a really good looking guy huh? i think it is because sex is so distracting from all your sorrows

I think it's my body trying to distract me from my decision to die.

 

[scoba32]

I think it's my body trying to distract me from my decision to die.

exactly the biological organism doesn't want to die

 

[TheTwelthRootOfTwo]

I think about suicide all the time. But once I decided I'm going to end things soon, my sex drive shot up. So much that I realized I really want to have sex before I go.

Oh my goodness I was going to post something about this very thing but didn't want to sound perverted lol. I feel like my libido shot up too lol

I think it's my body trying to distract me from my decision to die.

Wow I thought the same thing with my experience. It's like the body knows something is wrong the moment we make the decision to bump ourselves off and it's fighting back before we even do anything about it.

Ye idk why , but my body has this strong correlation between high libido and high suicidal state.
But all it takes is one orgasm and i stop caring

I'm glad to know I'm not crazy in this lol

 

[stopMotionSickness]

wow that is fascinating i think a pretty good way to find people is partner dances like salsa or line dancing or whatever

Curious, that's the second time I've heard specifically dance groups as a suggestion. As it so happens, I did folk dancing, and I know there are groups that keep up with it, public performances and all. I think it gets at a bit of that "who I am" I mentioned, though. I'm pretty big into shared interests, and dancing just isn't one for me. If I did go do those things, it would be for the sole purpose of socializing and "getting da gurl" which always makes me feel extremely uncomfortable. Plus people there are just too "normal" for me to connect with, for lack of a better word. Like how people genuinely have optimism about their future, don't think about things too hard, reach out and socialize naturally, formalities and all, it's just a deeply alien experience to me.
That being said, I could hope for finding a connection through my other interests. Hiking, rock hounding, fossil hunting, aquariums, gardening, astronomy, and scuba are all promising. Making plans to reconnect with all that over the summer. So I mean idk maybe. Hoping for romance just feels pretty heavy, so I'm aiming to just be content with thriving with what I enjoy

No, definitely not. I've been offered sex so many times but I always said no. Honestly I'm confused by my own body. Why does my sex drive get this high right before I decide to end things? It doesn't make sense to me.

I've actually heard that the neural pathways associated with libido track pretty closely past the amygdala, the major gland for aggression response. The going theory is that this explains the whole choking and bdsm association with sex drive. Maybe a similar thing is the case with violence towards oneself.

 

[Asya]

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[TheTwelthRootOfTwo]

[Hidden content]

That's so disturbing but so friggen hilarious at the same time!!! I almost DIED laughing when I saw this. Thanks for the laugh.

 

[Asya]

That's so disturbing but so friggen hilarious at the same time!!! I almost DIED laughing when I saw this. Thanks for the laugh.

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[soributton]

[Hidden content]

Story of my life

I wish either would stablilize hahaha would make life so much easier

 

[aufrechtm7]

this is literally denji.

I didnt expect to get this many laughs outta sasu today

 

[TheTwelthRootOfTwo]

Story of my life

I wish either would stablilize hahaha would make life so much easier

I know right!!! It's like my body is trying really hard not to let me kill it. One minute I'm "vivacious", next minute I'm ready to kill myself. It's like 2 personalities fighting each other.