snxw
lets pretend we're numb
- Apr 7, 2020
- 43
Honestly I'm just a fucking invisible ghost that everyone fucking hates. My mother has emotionally neglected me my whole life and when I dare ask her to talk to me she just fucking cant. She's always on her phone playing her games or browsing social media and pretending to listen. She fucking knows I want to die she was at a&e with me when I got lifted by the police for trying to drown myself! And she has convinced my whole family that she does help me with my mental health and that I'm just asking too much of her. Asking too much of her? What to have a cup of tea with me and talk about how i feel? She always makes me out to be a right bastard. She has called me a "weak bitch" for not being able to function properly she has sat back and let my older sister call me a "bully" and an "abuser" for trying to reach out. All my life I have been shamed and guilted into being silent about how I feel so they can ignore it. I cant live like this anymore. They gas light me and tell me that I have false memories of neglect and that it's all in my head. I just need it all to stop. Fuck this.