I don't like the thought that my relatives procreate

[noname223]

FIrst of all I won't convince her not to do it. My sister has the strong desire for a child with her boyfriend. I am bipolar and had 2 psychosis, she had 2 psychosis and almost everybody in my dads family has mental issues. Our genetics are so extremely fucked up. But tbh our parents abused us too.
Morevover in the family of her boyfriend there are a lot of mental issues too. Even more than in mine. I feel extremely sorry for this child if it ever comes to existence. It is not unlikely that I ctb and suicide has also a heriditary component. I really hope my sister realizes that this is a bad idea. I am a somewhat antinatalist and with my genetics I would never procreate.

 

[motel rooms]

She's taking a really big risk Why can't people just adopt a child??

 

[noname223]

She thinks with a good upbringing the child will be healthy. I doubt it.

 

[motel rooms]

She thinks with a good upbringing the child will be healthy. I doubt it.

I just don't understand why people want their children to have their genes...

 

[eternalmelancholy]

I really hope my sister realizes that this is a bad idea. I am a somewhat antinatalist and with my genetics I would never procreate.

It won't happen. Instinct to procreate is second only to survival instinct. People come up with all kinds of BS to justify bringing more lives into this misery.

People with fucked up genes living in absolute squalor won't think twice over having kids. People put more thought into what they are going to wear that day than to reflect on the ramifications of bring new lives into existence.

 

[BottomlessPit]

Instinct to procreate is second only to survival instinct.

I have to disagree, I don't think there is an instinct to procreate. There is only an instinct to have sex, and this can be done safely with contraceptives nowadays. The real issue isn't in our genetics, it's in our societal conditioning. Right from the beginning we are indoctrinated in not so subtle ways that procreating is the norm and part of the life script. Nobody questions it because of our herd mentality. The 'instinct' you talk about only exists in so far as this social pressuring is internalized to a high degree.

But a lot of it has also to do with plain selfishness. Kids are seen as a legacy, a trophy, a retirement plan (what the actual fuck).

People with fucked up genes living in absolute squalor won't think twice over having kids. People put more thought into what they are going to wear that day than to reflect on the ramifications of bring new lives into existence.

True. The total lack of regard for the person they are creating is utterly disgusting. They pop out kids like it's nothing.

 

[soap]

If you can't give your kids elite genetics or a fun, low stress childhood, you shouldn't be having kids.

My family is full of autism, dad is mediocre in almost everything, and mom is legit genetic trash.

 

[WornOutLife]

It's a classic.
You know, humans tend to be selfish and just want to bring children into this world so as to leave "copies of themselves" behind and "keep on living" in this world somehow. Nonsense! Poor little children!!!

 

[sm20]

She's taking a really big risk Why can't people just adopt a child??

That would actually be a really good idea to bring up to the sister, also bringing up the genetic issues would be good too. The moral thing would almost objectively be to adopt since it's helping a life that's already messed up and not making a new damaged life but I'm not sure how much that would persuade her.

 

[Zzzzz]

Birth is not a kindness. To give someone the guarantee that they will suffer and die in a predatory natural system that functions in a manner similar to natural eugenics. weeding out the weak and innocent by the millions. parents should not be surprised if their children are not happy in this cruel world.

 

[Mistake of Nature]

I have to disagree, I don't think there is an instinct to procreate.

But a lot of it has also to do with plain selfishness. Kids are seen as a legacy, a trophy, a retirement plan (what the actual fuck).

I too am unconvinced of this "biological urge to procreate".

Even if this instinct actually existed, it's nowhere near a good enough excuse to have children and is just a way for people to avoid accountability. People act like humans are incapable of overriding our instincts and urges when this is not true. In this case, all it takes is a bit of critical thinking and empathy, and the ruthlessness and pointlessness of procreating becomes crystal clear.

My sister has the strong desire for a child with her boyfriend. I am bipolar and had 2 psychosis, she had 2 psychosis and almost everybody in my dads family has mental issues. Our genetics are so extremely fucked up. But tbh our parents abused us too.
Morevover in the family of her boyfriend there are a lot of mental issues too.

It's ridiculous that anyone would choose to have children, but when people who have suffered greatly in life (as I'm assuming your sister has OP and possibly her boyfriend as well) decide to do this, it's truly mind-boggling. How anyone could be intimately familiar with the pain this existence has to offer and yet still decide to subject another person to these types of experiences is beyond me. I hope for the sake of the unborn child that your sister reconsiders.

 

[eternalmelancholy]

I too am unconvinced of this "biological urge to procreate".

Even if this instinct actually existed, it's nowhere near a good enough excuse to have children and is just a way for people to avoid accountability. People act like humans are incapable of overriding our instincts and urges when this is not true. In this case, all it takes is a bit of critical thinking and empathy, and the ruthlessness and pointlessness of procreating becomes crystal clear.

If there was no biological instinct to procreate none of us would be here. I think you are giving people too much credit. We are all slaves to our instincts to varying degrees. Otherwise SI wouldn't exist or would be easy to overcome. Maybe it is easy for some I don't know.

I think deep down everyone knows how shit life is but will never admit it. Having kids is generally a bad idea but that has never stopped anyone. Even in time of famine, disease and war.

 

[noname223]

I too am unconvinced of this "biological urge to procreate".

Even if this instinct actually existed, it's nowhere near a good enough excuse to have children and is just a way for people to avoid accountability. People act like humans are incapable of overriding our instincts and urges when this is not true. In this case, all it takes is a bit of critical thinking and empathy, and the ruthlessness and pointlessness of procreating becomes crystal clear.


It's ridiculous that anyone would choose to have children, but when people who have suffered greatly in life (as I'm assuming your sister has OP and possibly her boyfriend as well) decide to do this, it's truly mind-boggling. How anyone could be intimately familiar with the pain this existence has to offer and yet still decide to subject another person to these types of experiences is beyond me. I hope for the sake of the unborn child that your sister reconsiders.

I think my sister has suffered but way not as much as me. Her boyfrined is not mentally ill but I know one relative of him who has autism, depression and maybe borderline. Furthermore one nephew cannot even speak due to severe autism.
I told her to adopt a child but I think it is important for her that it is her child. Maybe I am dependent on her help when I am older so I won't interfere strongly. All I can do is watching another catastrophe to happen. I might be dead when this child comes into existence.
But there is still hope she won't have a child. I don't want to go into detail but she struggles with some aspects of her life a lot. However she denies suicidality completely.