I don't like sex

[whatevs]

I spent at least a decade jerking off to pornography (and had just one lesser sexual experience and a few even lesser ones in total). I still wank often, going through the motions. You become conditioned to do that because it used to be a coping mechanism.

These last years it has just dawned on me. Now that I have no libido left all that remains is an animal act and things that we hide for good reason. It might be years of sleep dysfunction or depression but I lost my libido completely. Now genitals are disgusting (to me). Fucking is disgusting (to me). It's almost funny when I see the adoration and incensed attention these things cause in people, because to me they are either indifferent or a bit repulsive.

It really does me make feel distanced from the human condition. I don't see this even in a whiny way, it just is. I'm a complete and utter weirdo and do not belong here very much. People like me might be called to become spiritual, this might be why religious celibacy has always existed.

 

[thereisthemist]

well asexuality exist, regardless of the interpretations
I personally kinda addicted to sexual ideas I still feel bad when actually doing sex sometimes
and those libido are too complicated to be analyzed mostly

do make such great nonsexual time as your opportunity to do new things, maybe a change of attention and focus will bring you much more than this three letter word

 

[Pluto]

I agree entirely. However, in my own case I attribute it to a few causes.

* Despite my dysfunctional background, I was a thousand times happier as a child when life didn't just boil down to people competing for animal acts and dominance hierarchies.
* A Pavlovian association of sexuality with abuse, cruelty, failure, isolation. Wishing to connect with others in a genuinely loving way, devoid of concerns for bodily gratification.
* The impact of depression/anhedonia
* Yes, spiritual ideas are a factor also, knowing that there are people who have discovered something of lasting value - even if I'm not actually among them

 

[fox_wannabe]

I feel I lost connection to what is human thanks to long periods of loneliness and depression, with that I lost my libido. Or maybe I lost libido first and with that humanity. But maybe before I lost libido I lost faith that I will ever have gf. I had gf but I always felt that I am not a real deal for her.

Sex is huge motivator for us and when you loose that you loose your ground. I was able to do "great things" when I believed It will give me sexual validation, if not now than later.

 

[S like suicide]

Look you're not a weirdo ... I thought the same as you when I was a fourteen year old ... sex disgusted me and scared me too ... I didn't care at all ... while everyone had their first relationships and approached happily at sex or masturbation I saw it as a meaningless and even a little disgusting act ... I couldn't understand how it was so important to others ...it made me feel really different from others

 

[Tomoko]

I do not like it because it is slimy and gross and risks children for a selfish person like me. Yuck.

 

[Angst Filled Fuck Up]

I find it too tiring what with my chronic fatigue. I'm not opposed to like a bj or something but I can't have that be the entire scope of the sexual encounter every time. So I've chosen to not really engage, as that seems fairest. I can count how many times I've had sex on one hand during the last 3 years. I don't miss it a whole lot though to be honest. Masturbation is easier and certainly less draining.

 

[maakies]

Porn and sex is not necessarily disgusting, but boring to me now. I have similar feelings to you about how overrated it is. Context: I have had a lot of sex and a lot of it was kinky and I have a higher than average body count. I like flirting more than sex lmao.

 

[Frog]

Ace-repulsed here, can confirm you're not alone. Not sure if I was born ace or traumatized to hate sex, but it's not like I've ever wanted to touch a person like that. Maybe hugs. Or a massage.

 

[fox_wannabe]

Thinking about sex > actual sex

 

[Sherri]

Nothing wrong with not liking sex. The world must stop all these taboos. Everyone is what they are co for table with. You do enjoy porn so you are not asexual. If I'm wrong please don't take it as an insult. I'm curious about all ways of life and behaviours to expand my personal horizons.

 

[Deadly_Intention]

I don't mind sex. But I don't care for it much either. Guess that happens when you orgasm maybe 1 out of every 30 times you actually have sex. There's no reward for me. I can masturbate and orgasm just fine. So I'm sure the goods are in working order, it may just take me much much longer than the person I'm doing it with and that's why I hardly enjoy it and find it pointless. No one wants a "limp" one inside of them... yuck. So it just ends once they are done and that's pretty much it. Boring

 

[WadeingThru]

I don't mind sex. But I don't care for it much either. Guess that happens when you orgasm maybe 1 out of every 30 times you actually have sex. There's no reward for me. I can masturbate and orgasm just fine. So I'm sure the goods are in working order, it may just take me much much longer than the person I'm doing it with and that's why I hardly enjoy it and find it pointless. No one wants a "limp" one inside of them... yuck. So it just ends once they are done and that's pretty much it. Boring

Maybe have a bullpen. You know like a second string? Next person up type of thing. When one finishes early someone else is standing by to jump in to finish the job.