Venting I don't know what's wrong with me

[istheretrulyalife?]

Life is... well, it's going. But I (almost) constantly feel sad. I don't know what it is, either. I have saved up enough for a therapist but I won't be telling them about my suicidal thoughts (that would turn into a mess)

I don't know what to expect, and the therapists where I am can get pretty pricy, so I don't have much options.

No matter what I present myself with (games, shows, youtube, clubs, social interaction, sports, etc.) I just can't find something that doesn't stop this aching inside me.

I don't expect a therapist to be a miracle, but I may give my life a few more years and see where it takes me.

 

[sunsh1n3]

Depression and boredom can be catastrophic, especially if they're combined. It took me multiple tries to find my "perfect fit" with my therapist, and once I did, everything else fell into place. Things I thought I'd never tell anyone about came up naturally in conversation, and telling her about those things led to more healing. So, if your first shot at therapy doesn't work out, don't give up. Give it another try, or another after that! If you feel like therapy genuinely just isn't for you, then don't force yourself to do something you don't want to, but if you feel like trying, then keep on trying. I hope you can feel better soon, and when you do, my favorite video game is Red Dead Repdemption 2, my favorite show is Zach Stone Is Gonna Be Famous, and my favorite YouTuber is Markiplier. Maybe you'll like one of those, too! :)

 

[FuneralCry]

Existing here certainly is so dreadful and tiring, to me there could never be any real relief from suffering in this world. But anyway I wish you the best in whatever happens going forward, to me it's certainly always such a bad idea being open about wanting to die especially with someone like that, ending up in the psych ward sounds so horrible to me.

 

[Praestat_Mori]

I can relate to your situation. It's just such a horrible life and so tiring when one is trapped in such a situation. I'm really sorry you (and your therapist) cannot detect the actual source and reason for your problems. But actually this is the key to find a way out of this. I hope you can find peace and I wish you all the best!

 

[istheretrulyalife?]

Depression and boredom can be catastrophic, especially if they're combined. It took me multiple tries to find my "perfect fit" with my therapist, and once I did, everything else fell into place. Things I thought I'd never tell anyone about came up naturally in conversation, and telling her about those things led to more healing. So, if your first shot at therapy doesn't work out, don't give up. Give it another try, or another after that! If you feel like therapy genuinely just isn't for you, then don't force yourself to do something you don't want to, but if you feel like trying, then keep on trying. I hope you can feel better soon, and when you do, my favorite video game is Red Dead Repdemption 2, my favorite show is Zach Stone Is Gonna Be Famous, and my favorite YouTuber is Markiplier. Maybe you'll like one of those, too! :)

I loved that game a lot, one of the only games that made me tear up.

 

[sunsh1n3]

I loved that game a lot, one of the only games that made me tear up.

For me, the "made me cry" game is Life is Strange. I love that game series so much that I refuse to finish the first one or play the others until the time is right, because I don't want it to end LOLL