Venting I don’t feel like my life is mine

[dinosavr]

I used to be reaaaalllyyyyy boring person, I'm in my twenties and I lived a life of a granny, very calm, etc.

Now, I can't really understand what is going on. Suddenly I am the person from the movies? I am one of the cases they describe in textbooks? And it's going further and further, from my first diagnosis, through many different meds, psychotherapy, months of suicidal ideation, police intervention, now the mental hospital. How further can it go? I already lost my hope and my will to heal. So I guess this movie won't have a happy ending. Although personally, I'd love it…
Time for some serious planning.

 

[timetodie24]

It is horrible when you feel like you've lost yourself and don't know how you got there.
I remember sitting on bed after being sectioned thinking how tf did I end up here , it didn't feel real or like me. it just starts with one med or a couple of therapy sessions and you have some hope . But things escalate and interventions get more intense and hope gets less . Idk how i got there either

 

[dinosavr]

It is horrible when you feel like you've lost yourself and don't know how you got there.
I remember sitting on bed after being sectioned thinking how tf did I end up here , it didn't feel real or like me. it just starts with one med or a couple of therapy sessions and you have some hope . But things escalate and interventions get more intense and hope gets less . Idk how i got there either

Exactly. And they'll keep on saying "when you need help, reach out" and you agree and try to reach out and eventually you're even further from happy than you were before.

 

[justanotherdaynow]

I feel this same way