Story I could have not been born into this world.

[Blue Rose]

"Did I request thee, Maker, from my clay​

To mould me man? Did I solicit thee​

From darkness to promote me?"​

― John Milton, Paradise Lost

Anti-natalists dislike this thread. Anyway, I am not an anti-natalist.

My mother had craved to have a daughter, and she had conceived finally.
But naturally, she should have not been pregnant. It had been extremely harmful to her whole body.
So, a doctor had suggested abortion to my mother strongly, but she refused and insisted.

In 1990's South Korea, abortion was illegal, but in few cases, it was allowed.
My mother could have aborted me legitimately, but she had refused and endured all pains until I was born into the world.
She had to take a Caesarean operation. She was unconscious and her blood pressure was about 200(Systolic).

Eventually, she gave the birth her only child, and became unable to conceive any longer.

For my mother, Who am I? or What am I? I know she loves me indeed, but she have never allowed me to choose my end on my accord.
This story makes me feel guilty sometimes. I feel resentment at my mother, at once, I feel I am under obligation to live on...

 

[Symbiote]

My mom felt the same way too, she forgot to take her birth control medicine and had me via C-Section. The resulting scar damaged her modeling career and she had to resort to prostitution and stripping. She was always hard on me and she resented me for it, never forgave me for popping out of her and blamed my birth as it was my fault.

 

[WornOutLife]

I think most parents are just selfish individuals who wanted to leave some copies of themselves in this world so as to keep on living somehow. You know, genes lol.