immrw

immrw

Member
Jan 22, 2023
82
in conversations i'll say something like "i'm just a suffering dog that needs to be put down"
or
"i wish i could be euthanized. take me out of the game coach"

no one says anything. no words of comfort. just silence. i'll still keep doing it because i genuinely don't give a fuck anymore about social norms.

there's no hope for my future
 
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todiefor

todiefor

I hope I made some +ve difference in ppl’s lives
Jun 24, 2023
458
I don't think it necessarily means people don't care or don't want to comfort u, they prob just don't know how to interpret what u r saying and potentially they may think it is a joke or they don't want to confront you and get it wrong. I find people are like this and it is disappointing I agree but if you do want someone to know perhaps say to them earnestly, not to alarm them but more if u wanted to talk about your feelings and what is causing them, if it is the case that u want people to understand and respond
 
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Soupster

Soupster

Chasing dreams, catching nightmares
Aug 14, 2024
165
I can relate. From experience there are a couple of reasons this tends to happen. The first, and most common I think is people just generally don't know how to react to it. There's such a stigma around it that a large number of people just don't know how to react in a kind and supportive manner, or are afraid they'll somehow make it worse. The second reason is desensitization. They've heard you and others say things before and nothing came of it so they just become numb to it and ignore it as 'just venting'..

While not getting support can be frustrating, it can be worse to have someone overreact and try to force involuntary treatment on you.
 
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Iris Blue

Iris Blue

-ˋˏ ༻❁༺ ˎˊ-
Oct 23, 2023
212
I like to say stuff like that a lot, it's how I cope with how I'm feeling but for the most part I try not to say it around others because they know my past and it could cause somewhat of a concern.

I don't know what exactly their thoughts are but I do agree with todiefor and soupster, a lot of the times when the subject of death is brought up (especially from someone who may be known to have a past with it) they don't know how to react. Or whether to take the comment seriously or not. Probably they may just not know what to do but don't want to handle the situation the wrong way so they don't say anything about it. I don't think it's not that they don't care they just probably don't know how to approach the situation. I'm sorry it's tough for you right now ♥️
 
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NotesFromTheShadow

NotesFromTheShadow

Member
Oct 28, 2023
15
Someone who has never been suicidal, probably finds that so disturbing that they literally get a lil brain freeze when anyone makes comments like these. Then they aimlessly look around for a bit and maybe say something random to change the topic. :pfff:
 
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astr4

astr4

memento mori
Mar 27, 2019
292
maybe it's my age but i find if i make these remarks to my peers i'll always get a "same"

sometimes they don't take you seriously because they've also been quasi-suicidal before, and know sometimes it's passive ideation and not something to fuss over.

heck, imagine if they took you seriously every single time, how quickly you might end up hospitalized.
 
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sugarb

sugarb

long time sunshine
Jun 14, 2024
604
in conversations i'll say something like "i'm just a suffering dog that needs to be put down"
or
"i wish i could be euthanized. take me out of the game coach"

no one says anything. no words of comfort. just silence. i'll still keep doing it because i genuinely don't give a fuck anymore about social norms.

there's no hope for my future
Key word is "casually dropping". Depending on who you're with, how close they are to you, your tone, or a whole ton of other factors that could be taken as a joke or a "man my life sucks right now" comment or they might just be uncomfortable/confused. If you want a serious response you need to state your ideation seriously. approach someone and go "hey man I've been struggling with suicidal ideation lately can we talk" and you'd probably get a response more like what you want
 
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CatLvr

Specialist
Aug 1, 2024
308
maybe it's my age but i find if i make these remarks to my peers i'll always get a "same"

sometimes they don't take you seriously because they've also been quasi-suicidal before, and know sometimes it's passive ideation and not something to fuss over.

heck, imagine if they took you seriously every single time, how quickly you might end up hospitalized.
I am truly heartbroken at the sheer number of young people (40 and under) on this forum. (And statistically what does that sat about "our" youth?? 😢😢) I wish I had some answers for the young women and men out there but unfortunately all I have is a lot of compassion and sympathy. I really don't think young adulthood was supposed to be like this. 😢
 
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LostExit

LostExit

In an ocean of sadness, it’s hard to keep swimming
Aug 28, 2024
7
I find many who have never felt despair… have no way of truly understanding. Leaving many clueless of how to even respond. Most times, I find it scares people. Even still, some are afraid to say much.
When they do it's almost always bs like
"it gets better" or
"think of all the good things" etc.
The tragedy is in the fact that's not even reality. I often wonder what that even is anymore. I have a demon whispering in my ear. Sometimes louder than my own thoughts. I hope you do know you are not alone. It's a dark world sometimes and the light is out of reach often.
 
gloomie

gloomie

grieving
Aug 23, 2024
8
i find most of the time, they don't understand deeply enough what it's like to feel like that, or assume you're making a joke. either way, i think most people just aren't equipped with enough empathy to respond reassuringly, if at all. it's lonely.
 
BobSmoked

BobSmoked

Member
Aug 27, 2024
43
in conversations i'll say something like "i'm just a suffering dog that needs to be put down"
or
"i wish i could be euthanized. take me out of the game coach"

no one says anything. no words of comfort. just silence. i'll still keep doing it because i genuinely don't give a fuck anymore about social norms.

there's no hope for my future
Sadly the world has conditioned people to to not notice the little things everyone is caught in the trap I'm sorry and if it's any consolation I relate to your post and it is very frustrating.
 
Grumble

Grumble

Deep Breaths
Aug 25, 2018
225
i think most people just aren't equipped with enough empathy to respond reassuringly, if at all.
I would go a bit further with this.

Personally, I am very much equipped to respond to the topic of suicidality as I've been living this hell for most of my life and can relate to and empathize with it all day long.

However. To engage someone about this requires a certain mindset. If we're just having a light, casual conversation, and you suddenly tell me about how you were thinking about killing yourself last night... That is a shell-shock "whoa" moment that is apt to stupefy even the most seasoned professionals. There is a process of reorientation that has to happen in order to make that transition from "light chatter" to the "deep and dark".

I think, in the moment, it would actually affect my ability to respond in a way that I'd want to respond. So much so that I might seem uncaring in the moment. And my thinking on this is, if this "casual drop" would catch ME off guard, then just imagine what it would do to the average person who has no personal experience with it.

Being so accustomed to suicidality, I have to be careful in my everyday life to avoid accidentally let something slip in a flippant manner. Yes, it's casual for us, but not for the average person, and for some people, you could shake the very foundation of their world by dropping this information at all, let alone catching them off guard with it.
 
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EvisceratedJester

EvisceratedJester

|| What Else Could I Be But a Jester ||
Oct 21, 2023
2,389
Yeah, that's probably because they assume that you are just joking or something. Not to be rude, but I've never understood why people get upset over others reacting to people randomly saying vaguely suicidal stuff by either going silent or just laughing and saying "me too". Most of the time people are going to assume that you are trying to make a joke, especially since suicide jokes and hyperboles are pretty common. If you want to have a serious conversation with them about your suicidal ideation then cut to the chase and open up about it. Saying shit like "I'm just a suffering dog that meeds to be put down" isn't going to get you anywhere, bud. Tell them bluntly what is going on with you.
 
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nembutal

nembutal

everything will be okay in the end
Jul 14, 2022
295
1. this behavior is so annoying when it's presented out of no where so please don't be surprised if these people dump you entirely because at the end of the day everyone is trying to keep their levels of optimism as high as possible as not to fall into despair and you don't exactly sound like a ray of light to be around

2. congratulations you've finally reached the lone wolf realization. yes, i've experienced firsthand the incapacity of others to have some semblance of care towards my behaviors. these same people will go on to wonder "what they could have done" after my absence. the realization that no one but you can preserve your survival instinct is distressing yet powerful as if dealt with correctly you learn how to care for yourself without needing external support. tread on soldier


don't expect people to drop everything they are doing to coddle you. it isn't realistic. at the end of the day everyone is mostly worried about preserving themselves.
 
Plentiful_Despair

Plentiful_Despair

Student
Aug 23, 2024
118
Almost nobody really cares about others. That's why I almost only communicate online now, it's less painful and simpler.
 

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