I can't read or look into the book "I'm Glad my Mom died"

[Water-Lily]

Rn I am in my Social Work class. We're talking about mother hood and how some mothers create enmeshed relationships with their children. The child responds by being "close" even when the parent is abusing them because they were put in the place of care taker. Their parent needed them more than the child needed them. That sums up my mom in a nutshell

Heavily enmeshed and just a bad mother overall. She was incredibly mentally unstable and abusive and needed treatment but never got it. I believe her own childhood trauma impacted and molded her into the person she inevitably became.

I still grieve the loss of my mom. I still hate her and have deep rage that I most of the time aim at myself in shame. I also want to love her (and still do) but I fear in doing that I am making it difficult to face the monstrous things she did to me. That me missing her for what was lost and what could have been is a bad thing

Jeanette Mccurdy seems so ahead of her trauma. She seems to confidently call out her moms abuse and completely cut off that enmeshment :/

 

[DepressedSloth]

I can't tell you how many times I've told my therapist how I wish both my parents were dead already and how angry I sometimes feel that they are still alive. Im in my 30s. If wanting them dead is wrong, then I don't wanna be right.

 

[Water-Lily]

I can't tell you how many times I've told my therapist how I wish both my parents were dead already and how angry I sometimes feel that they are still alive. Im in my 30s. If wanting them dead is wrong, then I don't wanna be right.

I'm not saying wanting them dead is wrong. Abusive parents bring that upon themselves. You're right to your feelings. I'm just saying I'm very conflicted on my own. If my mom approached love through enmeshment she couldn't possibly have loved me at all

 

[WAITING TO DIE]

Rn I am in my Social Work class. We're talking about mother hood and how some mothers create enmeshed relationships with their children. The child responds by being "close" even when the parent is abusing them because they were put in the place of care taker. Their parent needed them more than the child needed them. That sums up my mom in a nutshell

Heavily enmeshed and just a bad mother overall. She was incredibly mentally unstable and abusive and needed treatment but never got it. I believe her own childhood trauma impacted and molded her into the person she inevitably became.

I still grieve the loss of my mom. I still hate her and have deep rage that I most of the time aim at myself in shame. I also want to love her (and still do) but I fear in doing that I am making it difficult to face the monstrous things she did to me. That me missing her for what was lost and what could have been is a bad thing

Jeanette Mccurdy seems so ahead of her trauma. She seems to confidently call out her moms abuse and completely cut off that enmeshment :/

I can relate to this unfortunately.
My Mother was a malignant narcissist.
She destroyed every moment of my childhood.
I cannot think about her anymore because I get so angry.
She passed away 9 years ago, and I don't miss her at all.
So sorry you had a bad time too.

 

[Water-Lily]

I can relate to this unfortunately.
My Mother was a malignant narcissist.
She destroyed every moment of my childhood.
I cannot think about her anymore because I get so angry.
She passed away 9 years ago, and I don't miss her at all.
So sorry you had a bad time too.

I don't know if I truly miss mine or it's just grief. I'm sorry for you too

 

[DepressedSloth]

Rn I am in my Social Work class. We're talking about mother hood and how some mothers create enmeshed relationships with their children. The child responds by being "close" even when the parent is abusing them because they were put in the place of care taker. Their parent needed them more than the child needed them. That sums up my mom in a nutshell

Heavily enmeshed and just a bad mother overall. She was incredibly mentally unstable and abusive and needed treatment but never got it. I believe her own childhood trauma impacted and molded her into the person she inevitably became.

I still grieve the loss of my mom. I still hate her and have deep rage that I most of the time aim at myself in shame. I also want to love her (and still do) but I fear in doing that I am making it difficult to face the monstrous things she did to me. That me missing her for what was lost and what could have been is a bad thing

Jeanette Mccurdy seems so ahead of her trauma. She seems to confidently call out her moms abuse and completely cut off that enmeshment :/

I hope you find a way to move past these things as she did. It's really stressful holding onto it. There don't seem to be any easy answers though. It's a difficult thing to process this kinda trauma. Sorry you're in this spot.

 

[Water-Lily]

And people guilt trip and say suicide isn't a viable option

 

[wendy5c]

Jeanette's mother was insanely controlling by not letting her shower alone and forcing her into an eating disorder to make her a perfect child actress.