Venting I can't do this anyore

[iLikeFrogs]

I tried ok? I tried. I got into collage and barely passed 1st semester. I triend to survive because of my fucking parents inmpulse adopting a dog. I tried to live for her but I can't do this anymore. Therapy isn't working, no matter how much I study I barely pass. My mh is getting worse and now, I sleep in ONCE because I got fucking sick and both of my parents are just so fucking awful. Ok, I've been neglecting my chores (and myself but they don't care) and I didn't unload the fucking dishwasher becuase I was in bed asleep but all I asked was why they defrose the shrimp and just put it back to the freezer. I just asked that. And my mysogynistic father that been dogging on me for the last few days just went off telling me that I'm useless and how it's my fault ect. Ive been hearing nothing but how I'm just like my mother, how I'm manipulative and constant burden and that stupid bitch of a mother I have was on his side when I didn't even egt to say anything. It's been hard to stay aive but now I can't do it no wmore. I;n tryign ut i cant it's ony worese. tehre's no hel[p. if I don't kms today ill have to struggle this cycle. all I did was to alk anout fucking shrimp whattehwuia fucjl.l I'm sorry thi eamt is awfu; but im having a brtewaslfewn and sant see what i type. he's the same man taht strangled me twice ehen i had a meltdown when i was 14. that didn't ccare thtat i was sexually abused anf that my mother instead of accepting that it happened, eas only making shit worse by constantly touching me inaspporpriatelu. who told me to jump off the balcony when I was 16. I cant ok? I dont know why he's like that recently and why he said all thise alwuf mean thingsal becausde I asked him to boy tampons onc edalrier this month when me nor anyone wlse cudl do it and beacuse I asked about shrimp. I can't even wait for the stupid therapy seesssiopn this thurtay becausde i can't do it aanymore,. I think Im gonna do thius tonight. sorry u had to ewad this and sorry my poor puppy I'm leavign you beacause I cant do thisi shit anymoe.
blood tested my SN. blood became dark af and surely wont pass oxygen. I have ~3.5 teaspoons of it in 40ml water. I'm somewhat unsure about drinking it but I have it. don't have meto or benzies unfortunetly ://
blood tested my SN. blood became dark af and surely wont pass oxygen. I have ~3.5 teaspoons of it in 40ml water. I'm somewhat unsure about drinking it but I have it. don't have meto or benzies unfortunetly ://