I cannot get over what I lost

[Beachedwhale]

No matter what I still have now, I just cannot get over this because it has affected what I can have now and what I can have in the future, at least near future. I cannot do this and I do not want to do this anymore. It's just too much now, life was too complicated. I am exhausted. Its all the more absurd because it really didn't have to end up like this. It could've been really amazing if I just had a little bit more courage to make simple changes I wanted to make years ago. This is intolerable.

 

[the_final_countdown]

If it helps, loss is a part of the human condition. So many have had their lives tragically cut short as children and young adults, crippled by disease and circumstances and murder.

This is normal. The average. The expected.

The utter brutality and indifference of life.

I understand what it's like to lose everything that mattered to you. I do.

Take care.

 

[killedbypsychiatry]

I'm so sorry, I know how awful that feeling is. I also can't get over what I lost at all. It's in my mind all of the time and people don't understand. It's such a horrible overwhelming feeling of grief that's always sitting heavily on my chest and mind... people say I can get it back but I know I can't. I also constantly think about what could have been different to avoid this situation and it breaks my heart.

 

[avoid_slow_death]

Can relate. Been brutal most of my life and had a brief period of great hope, but lost that and now I simply cannot move forward anymore. Been so brutally hurt, I can never recover from this.

 

[Bullit]

Ditto.

 

[I want to end it]

What did you lose? Money, a loved one to ctb, a partner left you, something else?

 

[FuneralCry]

I know how that feels. We are cursed with being unable to forget anything and the more we go through, the more mentally exhausted we get and we start to lose the will to live. There is only so much one human can put up with. Life really is cruel, especially when we know it could have been different. I feel very tired of living.

 

[Scribble Fan]

I know how you feel and I'm sorry you have to go through this. I hope you find a way to make your loss more tolerable.

 

[PapaSuicide]

I was depressed and my ex wife left me, we sold our home and got divorced. I am bipolar type 1, I found out during hospitalization, I had a manic episode, I was hospitalized for six months and I lost my job. My life changed a lot in one year, I lost everything I fought for for years. I don't think I will have the strength to start over, I'm very tired!

 

[losteverthing]

me too
i've lost my lovely wife, all of my money, my friends and family
it's been 7 years since then
and ever since i didn't get out of the house (except for the supermarket or to doctor's and stuff)
my heart is broken i've lost everything
i'm crying nonstop everyday

 

[WornOutLife]

I can relate.
Past mistakes, the "what ifs?" and so on love to torment us.

Hoewever, there's this argentine song which says:

"You gotta let come what wants to come to you and let go that that wants to go away from you..."

It really helps me to cope with life daily!! There might still be some nice things to come! It ain't over yet!

 

[awfullife]

I lost everything as well. Mistakes were made. I want my old life back....but looking back I took it all for granted.

I guess the underlying mental health issues were always there I just "outperformed" them for years and excelled in corporate America. Once the shit hit the fan in my personal life, it only took 3 years to lose all my money, house, and kids.
At least I know I'm not alone and have this in common with some people on here- which helps.

 

[motel rooms]

I fucked up golden, glimmering opportunities because I had zero confidence because I didn't do one simple thing in school. And that's the main reason driving me to ctb

That's not the main reason driving you to ctb; you're focusing on the wrong thing. You're underestimating the severity of the trauma you were forced to deal with back then. Things went wrong before you "fucked up golden, glimmering opportunities". That's secondary. You fucked them up because certain people fucked you up. You know what I'm talking about

 

[Lost Magic]

I can't get over the past either and each day is killing me. I have tried to better things but it was all in vain. Life is so cruel.

 

[divorceddepression]

I was depressed and my ex wife left me, we sold our home and got divorced. I am bipolar type 1, I found out during hospitalization, I had a manic episode, I was hospitalized for six months and I lost my job. My life changed a lot in one year, I lost everything I fought for for years. I don't think I will have the strength to start over, I'm very tired!

Modern society talks of divorce like it's on the same level as buying a new house or moving.
No one wants to admit the serious trauma it's causing people.
I like going to therapy sites and seeing: "Get help with death, serious injury or divorce"
I see a list of some pretty serious things.

 

[VicMackey]

I was depressed and my ex wife left me, we sold our home and got divorced. I am bipolar type 1, I found out during hospitalization, I had a manic episode, I was hospitalized for six months and I lost my job. My life changed a lot in one year, I lost everything I fought for for years. I don't think I will have the strength to start over, I'm very tired!

I feel your pain. Im losing everything right now.