I am ready to do it

[nomorefight]

I have spent the whole summer being so lost in what to do. If I attempt to ctb and I fail, I will be hospitalized and not allowed to go back to school in the fall. I dont know if I can survive the rest of the summer without trying. Being home has been the most miserable experience of my life. If I succeed, I am worried what it will do to my best friend. I just hope that she can understand why I had to go. She is the only person I am worried about in this and I need her to know that I couldn't handle breathing any more, that it was just too painful. I wanted to try and keep fighting so I can get back to being with her. I actually think I might be in love with her, but I know she doesn't feel the same way about me. My therapist and psychiatrist have already told me they have given up on me. I am not sure yet exactly how I will do it, but I will probably try to od on my sleeping pills so I just fall asleep and never wake up. I really wanted to do it on my birthday, but I don't think I can make it to february. I am so thankful I have found this site to help me feel not alone while I work out the details of what I will do.

 

[TimeToDie]

...I will probably try to od on my sleeping pills so I just fall asleep and never wake up.

Modern sleeping pills (benzos & z-drugs such as Ambien) are exceptionally non-toxic. You'll definitely wake up. Back in ye olden days sleeping pills were barbiturates and they actually were potentially fatal -- such as the Nembutal that killed Marilyn Monroe or Seconal that killed Judy Garland or there was some barb that killed Jimi Hendrix (though he chocked on his own vomit in that case rather than the drug directly killing him).

 

[DepressionsAHo]

Pills in general don't work. Many months ago before a woman came and talked with me for like 2 hours (I'm thankful for her but hate that I'm still here) I was planning to OD by the cliffside so if the pills didn't work, I'd fall off and drown. I know now that that probably wouldn't work. Try to find another method mate

 

[nomorefight]

Modern sleeping pills (benzos & z-drugs such as Ambien) are exceptionally non-toxic. You'll definitely wake up.

I have over 300 mg of quetiapine. would that not be enough?

if anyone can/is willing to help me talk through a method that would be extremely helpful because i dont know that much

 

[thedutchguy]

I have over 300 mg of quetiapine. would that not be enough?

if anyone can/is willing to help me talk through a method that would be extremely helpful because i dont know that much

The forum is full with methodes. Look up the resource list. No one is gonna say which option you need to choose.

 

[not_a_robot]

Sleeping pills don't work that way, unless they're fentanyl or propo, stuff like that. Sorry.

 

[TimeToDie]

I have over 300 mg of quetiapine. would that not be enough?

There are many millions of people in the world that take more than that every single day.

 

[inconsequential]

I have over 300 mg of quetiapine. would that not be enough?

if anyone can/is willing to help me talk through a method that would be extremely helpful because i dont know that much

300mg of quetiapine wasn't even half of my daily dose for psychosis.

 

[Soul]

I have over 300 mg of quetiapine. would that not be enough?

if anyone can/is willing to help me talk through a method that would be extremely helpful because i dont know that much

I'm sorry you've been led to the point of contemplating this. If you look at the thread called List of Resources, near the top of the forum, you'll find miles of useful information about various methods. You need to look through that and find something that suits you.

 

[Dead Panda]

Give yourself sometime to think it out. Plan it carefully, figure out your best options.

 

[LittleJem]

Look at website Lost All Hope. It shows failure rates for different methods. There is a nicotine method explained on the net that is easy to source. I don't know its success rate.

 

[jake3d]

Nicotine suicide has been done, yes. But it is unreliable and will hurt like fuck since it is a stimulant. Attempting to kill yourself using stimulants is a very bad idea. You will most likely end up alive with possible mental illness and a guaranteed ticket to the looney ward.

 

[Bulletwbttrflywings]

I have spent the whole summer being so lost in what to do. If I attempt to ctb and I fail, I will be hospitalized and not allowed to go back to school in the fall. I dont know if I can survive the rest of the summer without trying. Being home has been the most miserable experience of my life. If I succeed, I am worried what it will do to my best friend. I just hope that she can understand why I had to go. She is the only person I am worried about in this and I need her to know that I couldn't handle breathing any more, that it was just too painful. I wanted to try and keep fighting so I can get back to being with her. I actually think I might be in love with her, but I know she doesn't feel the same way about me. My therapist and psychiatrist have already told me they have given up on me. I am not sure yet exactly how I will do it, but I will probably try to od on my sleeping pills so I just fall asleep and never wake up. I really wanted to do it on my birthday, but I don't think I can make it to february. I am so thankful I have found this site to help me feel not alone while I work out the details of what I will do.

Hugs... I hear your struggle and I'm so sorry you feel this way. Much love and compassion to you.