thinkkank
Experienced
- Oct 16, 2019
- 247
I lost my job some months ago and I've been looking for one ever since. I've been calling every agency there is for months with no luck. The one agency I was counting on was the one I was with. They said they would get me a job if one become available but it turns out that was a lie.
When I was fired the agency told me that the company was having a down period and were letting some people go. When things picked back up they would rehire people. Turns out that was a lie. The agency told me today that the company fired me because I was taking too long at my lunch break. The company never told me directly why they fired me, the agency told me. They also told me that they only had one client which was that company. They said if an employee was fired from that company they wouldn't help them get another job i.e they would end their relationship with that former employee. So here I was expecting them to save the day when they had lied to me the whole time.
So here I am stuck with no hope in sight. I'm behind on my rent and I'm still suffering from chronic pain. I need more meds but my savings are in the red right now. My family is struggling financially so I can't borrow money from them. I only have enough money to pay for the bus to take me to and from the food bank because I can't afford food.
I fucked things up yet again. Yet again my poor decisions ruined everything. All I had to do was be on time with the lunch breaks. It's not like I was taking two hours to eat. The lunch break was 30 minutes and I took 35 to 40 minutes because the cafeteria was a five minute walk from my work station. Could I have eaten faster or had my meals at work station? Sure. I could've pulled up a chair and eaten in the carpentry department next to the saw dust and metal filings. Looking back I would've done anything if I had known that I would get fired.
It was a shitty job, but it was a job, and I was getting better at it. I was making good money. I was living the high life (compared to how I'm living now). I just want to go back in time and grab my past self by the collar and tell him "don't eat slowly!"
I'm going to lose this roof over my head because I always fuck up. I always have a good thing and then I make some dumb mistake and it goes away forever.
I need to lie down. I have this pit in my stomach and I just need to lie down.
When I was fired the agency told me that the company was having a down period and were letting some people go. When things picked back up they would rehire people. Turns out that was a lie. The agency told me today that the company fired me because I was taking too long at my lunch break. The company never told me directly why they fired me, the agency told me. They also told me that they only had one client which was that company. They said if an employee was fired from that company they wouldn't help them get another job i.e they would end their relationship with that former employee. So here I was expecting them to save the day when they had lied to me the whole time.
So here I am stuck with no hope in sight. I'm behind on my rent and I'm still suffering from chronic pain. I need more meds but my savings are in the red right now. My family is struggling financially so I can't borrow money from them. I only have enough money to pay for the bus to take me to and from the food bank because I can't afford food.
I fucked things up yet again. Yet again my poor decisions ruined everything. All I had to do was be on time with the lunch breaks. It's not like I was taking two hours to eat. The lunch break was 30 minutes and I took 35 to 40 minutes because the cafeteria was a five minute walk from my work station. Could I have eaten faster or had my meals at work station? Sure. I could've pulled up a chair and eaten in the carpentry department next to the saw dust and metal filings. Looking back I would've done anything if I had known that I would get fired.
It was a shitty job, but it was a job, and I was getting better at it. I was making good money. I was living the high life (compared to how I'm living now). I just want to go back in time and grab my past self by the collar and tell him "don't eat slowly!"
I'm going to lose this roof over my head because I always fuck up. I always have a good thing and then I make some dumb mistake and it goes away forever.
I need to lie down. I have this pit in my stomach and I just need to lie down.