Tintypographer
I am done as of 4-21-2023. Somewhere I am no more
- Apr 29, 2020
- 471
I am suicidal. I have been through 29 plus years of therapy and daily medication and I can afford the best of care. I've been kicked out of your Twitter page with you angry, I've been kicked off suicide forum because I argued that therapy doesn't and will not work for me. Yet here when I bring these things up people understand. They tell me that they understand how I feel. I'm educated with post graduate degrees, three kids, church every week and a 25 plus year marriage. I've been in inpatient and outpatient therapy and literally not one thing has ever brought me solace like this website. Yet you won't for even a moment acknowledge every one bit that mental health in the USA is failing. Suicide is growing. It's growing fast and it's not growing because people have found a sudden revelation on this website. Kevin Hines didn't learn to jump off the goldent gate bridge here. My daughter didn't learn to shoot herself here. The growing problem is that cognitive based therapy and once a week sessions of telling people to accept their situation and reframe it doesn't work. Bullies don't go away in this world, they keep attacking and that scar is just like post traumatic stress for a kid. You can't fix it with discussions of "hey kid, just suck it up and be tough" or "let's discuss how you feel". It takes serious 1:1 effort with high level professionals that modern families would have to sell homes and quit jobs to care for. Sons and daughters don't take their lives because of this website. They take their lives because they are depressed, full of anxiety and the pain is so bad that there is no way a parent can ever help them and they feel like absolutely nothing is left to live for.
People kill themselves because we have 1.2 guns per individual in the USA
en.m.wikipedia.org
Suicide rates are increasing and remain a leading cause of death in all age groups with guns as the primary cause
www.nimh.nih.gov
Suicide is not new and is not brought to people here. The firearm or jumping off a high building or choking are not new.
Suicide is something that really should be deeply understood and quality medical care at the level of severe trauma should be afforded but the people who could march to the capitol and demand action have decided to attack the one group who is affected most by the disease we have. Assaulting this forum is tantamount to attacking a disease group trying to make an understanding of their condition.
For those who have broken free of daily suicidal ideation that leaves you wishing every morning that you were sleeping for ever I wish you would share what worked for you that didn't involve meds, rationalizing, dreaming of a better life around the corner or prayer because those things have not turned my suicidal ideation into a better feeling for over 20 years.
I challenge you, Kelli, debate me without referring to incels (I am not one-married, quite conservative and in a career surrounded by women leaders), or taking a special pleading that "you just dont understand how bad that place is" or "children are there".
I agree no children should be on this website. Parents including myself should take away phones, install systems that monitor access like circle by Disney or other systems that let you watch everything they do. I do this. My kids lose their internet for playing Fortnite with people I don't specifically know and know their parents.
Debate me around the idea of the failings of mental health care, people facing severe treatment resistant depression and a continuous desire to die rather than be alive even with all the good things going for them that the world can offer.
And don't creat a strawman around "incels" or "predators" or other things. Statistically the boy scouts had predators and incels, the church hierarchy had predators and incels, government leaders have had predators and incels. These are horrible things at the level of any other horror the world can have. But suicide and trying to make sense of it isn't hurting a person from the outside. It's eating away at us from the inside. To the point that we don't want to be around even to see out children grow up. We live in homes, volunteer in our communities, write, play piano, and in the face of it want to die all the time. And this disease is growing. It's getting bigger and bigger every month and every year. And no one wants to address it except to say "if you're suicidal call the hotline for help".
No one ever tells a cancer patient, "stay away from groups of other cancer victims, their predators".
I want no one to die. Well I suppose when my 98 year old grandmother was in a vegetative state a few years ago I prayed to God to ease her suffering and take her while she was on hospice. I don't get a perverse satisfaction.from people dying. Or committing suicide. But I genuinely feel the desire to die. Your words sting. They say "if you're suicidal you need help and that's it". HELP IN THE CURRENT FORM IS NOT WORKING AND THERE IS A STATISTICAL PERCENTAGE OF PEOPLE LIKE ME. Nothing gets me more depressed than the idea of someone saying, "why do you think you feel that way?". Are you kidding me? Why do I hate
Everything about my existence and wish I was dead all the time despite living in America, having a good job, good family and plenty of resources? As though I haven't spent 20 years wishing I had some sort of joy.
Remember the plots from the NIH. Suicide is INCREASING. You're not helping cut it with some one by one campaign against the evil serge or marquis and the concept of a death cult.
Put your effort into understanding why school counseling fails and is poorly staffed if you want to understand teen suicide, try to understand the concepts of depression related to always on social media and work to maximum productivity curves for adults, try to understand.the pain of a science that hasn't changed since the early days of cognitive behavior therapy that charges 200 dollars per hour out of network for a session and a high percentage don't take insurance and for insurance that does find a therapist, limits to 12 visits per year total after with 60 percent covered after meeting the 5k.deductable.
Death is scary and suicide is terrible. I wish it wasn't part of my life. I've booked two flights to San Francisco one way and not gone through with jumping. They're putting up a barricade now but there are other places high enough. I'm scared of telling people like you that I'm suicidal and the only thing you can say is that I need help. Yes but... Is what I say to people who say I need help. Help me and the rest of my kind with something better than what exists today.
THE NUMBERS WILL CONTINUE TO GO UP AS LONG AS WE DONT FIGURE THIS OUT
People kill themselves because we have 1.2 guns per individual in the USA
Estimated number of civilian guns per capita by country - Wikipedia
Suicide rates are increasing and remain a leading cause of death in all age groups with guns as the primary cause
Suicide
An overview of statistics for suicide. Suicide is a major public health concern. Suicide is among the leading causes of death in the United States. Based on recent nationwide surveys, suicide in some populations is on the rise.
Suicide is not new and is not brought to people here. The firearm or jumping off a high building or choking are not new.
Suicide is something that really should be deeply understood and quality medical care at the level of severe trauma should be afforded but the people who could march to the capitol and demand action have decided to attack the one group who is affected most by the disease we have. Assaulting this forum is tantamount to attacking a disease group trying to make an understanding of their condition.
For those who have broken free of daily suicidal ideation that leaves you wishing every morning that you were sleeping for ever I wish you would share what worked for you that didn't involve meds, rationalizing, dreaming of a better life around the corner or prayer because those things have not turned my suicidal ideation into a better feeling for over 20 years.
I challenge you, Kelli, debate me without referring to incels (I am not one-married, quite conservative and in a career surrounded by women leaders), or taking a special pleading that "you just dont understand how bad that place is" or "children are there".
I agree no children should be on this website. Parents including myself should take away phones, install systems that monitor access like circle by Disney or other systems that let you watch everything they do. I do this. My kids lose their internet for playing Fortnite with people I don't specifically know and know their parents.
Debate me around the idea of the failings of mental health care, people facing severe treatment resistant depression and a continuous desire to die rather than be alive even with all the good things going for them that the world can offer.
And don't creat a strawman around "incels" or "predators" or other things. Statistically the boy scouts had predators and incels, the church hierarchy had predators and incels, government leaders have had predators and incels. These are horrible things at the level of any other horror the world can have. But suicide and trying to make sense of it isn't hurting a person from the outside. It's eating away at us from the inside. To the point that we don't want to be around even to see out children grow up. We live in homes, volunteer in our communities, write, play piano, and in the face of it want to die all the time. And this disease is growing. It's getting bigger and bigger every month and every year. And no one wants to address it except to say "if you're suicidal call the hotline for help".
No one ever tells a cancer patient, "stay away from groups of other cancer victims, their predators".
I want no one to die. Well I suppose when my 98 year old grandmother was in a vegetative state a few years ago I prayed to God to ease her suffering and take her while she was on hospice. I don't get a perverse satisfaction.from people dying. Or committing suicide. But I genuinely feel the desire to die. Your words sting. They say "if you're suicidal you need help and that's it". HELP IN THE CURRENT FORM IS NOT WORKING AND THERE IS A STATISTICAL PERCENTAGE OF PEOPLE LIKE ME. Nothing gets me more depressed than the idea of someone saying, "why do you think you feel that way?". Are you kidding me? Why do I hate
Everything about my existence and wish I was dead all the time despite living in America, having a good job, good family and plenty of resources? As though I haven't spent 20 years wishing I had some sort of joy.
Remember the plots from the NIH. Suicide is INCREASING. You're not helping cut it with some one by one campaign against the evil serge or marquis and the concept of a death cult.
Put your effort into understanding why school counseling fails and is poorly staffed if you want to understand teen suicide, try to understand the concepts of depression related to always on social media and work to maximum productivity curves for adults, try to understand.the pain of a science that hasn't changed since the early days of cognitive behavior therapy that charges 200 dollars per hour out of network for a session and a high percentage don't take insurance and for insurance that does find a therapist, limits to 12 visits per year total after with 60 percent covered after meeting the 5k.deductable.
Death is scary and suicide is terrible. I wish it wasn't part of my life. I've booked two flights to San Francisco one way and not gone through with jumping. They're putting up a barricade now but there are other places high enough. I'm scared of telling people like you that I'm suicidal and the only thing you can say is that I need help. Yes but... Is what I say to people who say I need help. Help me and the rest of my kind with something better than what exists today.
THE NUMBERS WILL CONTINUE TO GO UP AS LONG AS WE DONT FIGURE THIS OUT
