How would you feel if private chats from you were leaked to the public?

[noname223]

I had the idea due to the Johnny Depp- Amber Heart court case.

Trigger warning explicit language about violence:


"Let's drown her before we burn her!!!" "I will fuck her burnt corpse afterwards to make sure she's dead."
In a text message describing the flight, Depp described himself as "an angry aggro injun in a fucking blackout, screaming obscenities and insulting any fuck who got near."


I think there were even more messages. He chatted with one of his friends. And their language was seemingly very violently and offending. Not sure how I shall feel about that. Maybe it is different to assess in case there really was violence. Or if this were just some edgy jokes. I think there was abuse from both sides.
But sometimes I also do some offending jokes with myf friends. They are politically very correct but sometimes I just want to provoke a WTF as a reaction.

When I was a teenager during my first mania I was made horrible jokes without standard. It was my way of coping getting phsyically abused, having suicidal thoughts and getting bullied in school. Yeah I did some stupid shit. But I have stopped doing that. If I make an offending or edgy joke I would never do it in front of people who could take it personal/serious. My friends know I don't mean these jokes seriously. I think the things we are allowed to make jokes of should not be restricted too much. But for me it is a huge difference for example who the audicence is. If I would make offenfding jokes on the public internet I would hurt people. But making an awful stupid joke with your best friends usually don't hurt anyone. Of course the joke should not be based on some secret stereotypes the person really has. Yeah but I am not against insensitive jokes in general. But for example in this forum with many vulnerable people we should try to be careful in order not to hurt anyone.

So what would happen if your private conversations were leaked? Would you also have been caught making jokes which are inappropriate? The defence of Depp was as far as I remember. Almost anyone would look bad if their private meessages were leaked. Would you look bad too?

 

[outatime_85]

I think once you send it, you really can't control what the recipient thinks about its content or what the recipient does with it.

You can only control how you respond.

I think most people's response would be to remove that person from their circle if they broke the trust bond by forwarding whatever was sent without first thinking should they forward this or even asking the original senders' permission.

However, just because you remove yourself from the culprit, you are still friends with everyone else in the circle with whom it was shared, which means having to remove oneself from the entire circle and starting from scratch in search of people you can trust or becoming a loner.

I do not know if everyone is willing to go that route.

Continuing with regard to trust, after they have had people talk about their personal business behind their backs or forward personal chats to people who should not have been in the loop, this usually leads to an individual going dark with their thoughts when it comes to sending electronic communications or even in-person communications.

I think once something like what is being discussed happens, it changes a person's mindset and the response can be quite eye-opening, especially in a work or school environment.

Gone are the open feelings and open-thought texts or in-person conversations like "I'm sad and depressed," "I got a new bf/gf," and so on.

They can't or don't trust the people they know or meet (or groups if they are in one) that they are in communication with.

So the people around them now only see that they will keep what they send or say strictly to work/business or school/college type things.

The act has effectively closed off the portion of communication that builds healthy relationships.

I will leave off with this: if you want to take a somewhat talkative, trusting person and turn them into a distrustful, dark, quiet, aloof person, one way would probably be to do something like what is being described. However, most people won't like the person they create after breaking their trust.

Sorry for the rambling thoughts.

 

[Lost Magic]

Yeah, people say all sorts of crazy shit behind closed doors. Privacy violations are disgusting, especially when those intimate thoughts and actions are exposed to a greater public. We truly are living in Orwellian times. Don't believe me, look into China's surveillance system. And they sell their tech to lots of countries around the world. Privacy is dead.

 

[hamvil]

I have some quite embarrassing chats. Some on sex topics, some with a former girlfriend. One is similar to the text you posted. I have difficulties understanding where is the limit when speaking/writing and I tend to get sadistic very easily.

 

[Install-Gentoo]

I think there is a pretty predictable response to "what would you do if this happened" when you're asking this particular forum.
And yes, my response is also that particular expected response.

 

[Celerity]

I would be pretty humiliated and would probably have to move far away and start over somewhere else, maybe even change my name. I have said hateful things before when angry, so I get it, but I haven't been that bad in writing yet.