Help How to support people who say they need a method ASAP?

[LoiteringClouds]

I have read several posts here which says "I must die soon but I don't know which method should I use. I need it ASAP."
I can't offer any advice about methods other than those I've used in my failed attempts. SaSu has the riches of information about methods and they seems that they have done their research here and still couldn't find a method satisfy their needs. I want to support them, but I feel lost. I feel like all they need is a method, not emotional crap, after all.

All I can do for now is leave a hug on their posts, or leave a reply to a post which the user wrote on another thread. I feel so helpless but what truly matters is their well-being, not my ego boosts. I think sometimes I have to accept the fact that I can't support them any further, but if I could help them, I would like to know how.

Please let me know if further elaboration is needed.
Any suggestions are appreciated!

 

[FuneralCry]

With posts like that there is nothing much that can be said that is appropriate other than things like "I'm sorry that you are suffering, best wishes, I hope that you eventually find the peace you wish for", or people can say that they relate in some way, like if you are in a similar situation you can emphasise with them. When people post that they struggle to ctb, that is something that I very much understand as of course it's why I'm still trapped here and I guess that in regards to method advice, it's a personal decision deciding what method to choose and others cannot really decide for them.

But I think that people in the suicide discussion either want to vent, or just want their feelings validated and they don't want any kind of pro lifer patronising type comments. If people were looking for non method related "help" and both want to exist and see potential for their situation to improve then they would post in the recovery section or they wouldn't be on here in the first place. There is a reason why the forum has separate sections, so that there is a place for people to escape from invalidating statements like "it gets better, just hang in there". I think that it's really insensitive and dismissive for people to push positivity like that onto people in the suicide section when it's not asked for as after all nobody else can experience their life. It's a pro choice forum where the focus is on respecting people's decisions and people don't deserved to be treated like they cannot make decisions for themselves.

 

[MoonlitNight]

I have read several posts here which says "I must die soon but I don't know which method should I use. I need it ASAP."
I can't offer any advice about methods other than those I've used in my failed attempts. SaSu has the riches of information about methods and they seems that they have done their research here and still couldn't find a method satisfy their needs. I want to support them, but I feel lost. I feel like all they need is a method, not emotional crap, after all.

All I can do for now is leave a hug on their posts, or leave a reply to a post which the user wrote on another thread. I feel so helpless but what truly matters is their well-being, not my ego boosts. I think sometimes I have to accept the fact that I can't support them any further, but if I could help them, I would like to know how.

Please let me know if further elaboration is needed.
Any suggestions are appreciated!

by that time I think you should let go. the only thing you can wish them at that moment is that a miracle gives them one last reason to be happy and to hang onto life in such a way that they want to be better both for themselves and for said-reason.
Else it's better for their mental well being as well as yours to stay away from the post as the guilt stays.

 

[LoiteringClouds]

With posts like that there is nothing much that can be said that is appropriate other than things like "I'm sorry that you are suffering, best wishes, I hope that you eventually find the peace you wish for", or people can say that they relate in some way, like if you are in a similar situation you can emphasise with them. When people post that they struggle to ctb, that is something that I very much understand as of course it's why I'm still trapped here and I guess that in regards to method advice, it's a personal decision deciding what method to choose and others cannot really decide for them.

But I think that people in the suicide discussion either want to vent, or just want their feelings validated and they don't want any kind of pro lifer patronising type comments. If people were looking for non method related "help" and both want to exist and see potential for their situation to improve then they would post in the recovery section or they wouldn't be on here in the first place. There is a reason why the forum has separate sections, so that there is a place for people to escape from invalidating statements like "it gets better, just hang in there". I think that it's really insensitive and dismissive for people to push positivity like that onto people in the suicide section when it's not asked for as after all nobody else can experience their life. It's a pro choice forum where the focus is on respecting people's decisions and people don't deserved to be treated like they cannot make decisions for themselves.

by that time I think you should let go. the only thing you can wish them at that moment is that a miracle gives them one last reason to be happy and to hang onto life in such a way that they want to be better both for themselves and for said-reason.
Else it's better for their mental well being as well as yours to stay away from the post as the guilt stays.

Thank you for your responses. I agree that the method is their personal decision and no one should push any "hope" in the Suicide Discussion section. Yes, it was a kind of miracle that I recovered from my worst time. I can't expect it to happen to everybody. Thanks again!

 

[Marine]

I have read several posts here which says "I must die soon but I don't know which method should I use. I need it ASAP."
I can't offer any advice about methods other than those I've used in my failed attempts. SaSu has the riches of information about methods and they seems that they have done their research here and still couldn't find a method satisfy their needs. I want to support them, but I feel lost. I feel like all they need is a method, not emotional crap, after all.

All I can do for now is leave a hug on their posts, or leave a reply to a post which the user wrote on another thread. I feel so helpless but what truly matters is their well-being, not my ego boosts. I think sometimes I have to accept the fact that I can't support them any further, but if I could help them, I would like to know how.

Please let me know if further elaboration is needed.
Any suggestions are appreciated!

Despite the supposed wealth of information I've personally found that finding a safe, painless and sure method in 2023 is extremely difficult for anyone who isn't rich, lives in the EU and isn't super tech or black markets savvy... SN doesn't seem like a safe option, it's not necessarily easy to find anymore either, and that's pretty much the only accessible ressources I find nowdays...

You can always redirect the people making these posts to masterposts / ressources I guess or give your personal opinion but I don't know if I missed something after being away for a while or if it's become ridiculously hard to die decently now... Even if I'd rather have a way to live I absolutely don't still and even then I would only feel secure with a safe exit method... Anyway just my two cents on that subject. Sorry if I injected too much personal dilemna.

 

[LoiteringClouds]

Despite the supposed wealth of information I've personally found that finding a safe, painless and sure method in 2023 is extremely difficult for anyone who isn't rich, lives in the EU and isn't super tech or black markets savvy... SN doesn't seem like a safe option, it's not necessarily easy to find anymore either, and that's pretty much the only accessible ressources I find nowdays...

You can always redirect the people making these posts to masterposts / ressources I guess or give your personal opinion but I don't know if I missed something after being away for a while or if it's become ridiculously hard to die decently now... Even if I'd rather have a way to live I absolutely don't still and even then I would only feel secure with a safe exit method... Anyway just my two cents on that subject. Sorry if I injected too much personal dilemna.

Thank you for your input. I agree with you on difficulty with finding pain-free and reliable method.
I have a lot of things to learn here, as I'm a relatively new member. I'm still afraid to be invalidating, but I'll try to do my best to be supportive.

 

[LaVieEnRose]

Even if you don't have any concrete answers or suggestions or novel insight you can always validate their feelings. Validation goes a long way and most people respond positively to it.