How to overcome the fear of hell?

[Pomegranate]

Like many others, I was indoctrinated to believe in a particular belief system. Now that I've grown up and read arguments for and against God, as well as learned how ambiguous his existence and identity are, I've become agnostic. But the primal fear of hell still carries on. I'm scared I may be the main character in some higher power's movie or video game, or perhaps God is testing me. Other times, I worry if this whole world is a simulation. I know had I not been taught religion at a young age that I wouldn't have this fear; I enjoy the bliss of not having to think about the hell of Buddhism or Hinduism. But I can't do it for my family's religion of Islam.

Does anyone have any tips or pieces of advice that worked for them? Here are some statements that make my day a little easier, but they're not enough for me:

• There are so many differences even within the same sect, let alone religion, that I'm bound to go to a hell no matter what I believe in.
• Had I grown up in a Christian family, I would've feared Jesus's hell. Had I grown up in a Hindu family, I would've feared Naraka.
• I'll never know with absolute certainty the ultimate truth (if there is one). I'm only a human being.
  • If I won't know the ultimate truth until I die, then I can either live a life full of philosophical worries or life without too much philosophical worry. I may as well live the latter.
• Lots of things we take for granted we aren't 100% sure of. I don't know if I'll get into a crash when I'll drive to the grocery store tomorrow. I don't know if I'll be hit by a meteorite by 2030. Yet people still drive all the time. Doesn't look like we'll get hit by a meteorite anytime soon. The world goes on.

 

[soonatpeace777888]

The idea that you are tortured for eternity for not believing in a certain religion or because you want freedom from pain is absurd. Its clearly a method just to make people afraid to break what ever rules the religion is imposing.

 

[NambaSutra]

I don't think anybody alive can help you with this. Sorry. It's not like anybody capable of speaking has been there and back.
I struggle with it too. I know I'll find out someday but I hope it is much sooner than later.

 

[Coldpizza22]

You can just try to not belive in it or try to live a life that will make you avoid hell. Live a good life, help other people around you who are in need of help. It doesn't need to be purely financial, just visiting someone who is lonely, not holding grudges, helping older people and people with disabilities. I was raised catholic and this was what we were taught. Idk about islam, you probably have something similar. God is a fair judge who awards good and punishes bad. Jusy try ti be the best you can be and if you repent, your sins can be forgiven. You try to live a honest and fair life and you'll be fine. You can die at any moment, so try to do good on this world snd you'll get judged for your actions, may they be good or bad, that will decide your fate.

 

[Celerity]

I'm sorry that I don't really have a good answer to this question. What I can say is that I occasionally feel the same way even after being an atheist for over a decade now. I think when you consider how terrible the depictions of hell are, fear is more than understandable. When the stakes are that high, any degree of uncertainty (however small) can feel unbearable.

What comforts me sometimes is to think about the likely fallibility of our understanding of hell. Even if I entertain the notion that God of say, the Bible, exists, the evidence of mistakes in that holy book is irrefutable. Check this out for a striking visual for all the contradictions in the Bible - https://www.fastcompany.com/1701846/infographic-day-what-bible-got-wrong.

If the holy scriptures can be so fallible, how seriously can we take its central tenants? Is our understanding of God even remotely correct (assuming God exists?). Perhaps God is indeed extremely proud, demanding, and malevolent or perhaps God is thoroughly benign and forgiving or maybe God is a clockwork universe God who views us like one would pool balls on a pool table - objects set in motion with predictable paths that hold no emotional meaning. In either case, the odds that humans have faithfully recorded the essential nature and will of such a being are so low considering all those documented mistakes.

 

[HighFlight]

Not sure how helpful this will be, but I simply talk to God. We carry on a conversation almost daily.

There's a book titled "Conversations with God: An Uncommon Dialogue" by Neale Walsch. After reading this book, I started having discussions in my mind as if I was actually talking to God. (my variation to "what would Jesus do") It allowed to look at things differently. Or I might just be crazy.

Hope you find some answers.

 

[jar-baby]

I know how you feel. I was raised in a conservative Muslim environment too and my journey to atheism meant contending with a fear of hell, too. It's unfortunately a fairly common experience among ex-muslims (and ex-christians) too, but fortunately many people to experience it have created resources to help others.



It would also help to learn more about the history of hell— you're likely familiar with the term jahannum. That derives from Gehenna, which is actually a physical place in Jerusalem that gave rise to the Abrahamic conception of hell (although hell as a concept can be traced further back, to Zoroastrianism (a faith that is now practiced by very few, much like, I believe, Islam and Christianity will be one day)).

I think learning about this is useful because it helps cement the fact that hell is a completely manmade concept— conceived of from physical locations and used as a mechanism for control. It's not the creation of the divinity. And certainly not the creation of an omnibenevolent divinity, like Allah is supposed to be. A god who sends people to hell forever for not believing in him even though— naturally, as you say— one's belief depends predominantly on one's domestic and social environment, which in turn, is really just based on chance— isn't a rational or merciful god.

You can learn more here about the history of hell here:



And if you're up for a longer read, I often see Bart D. Ehrman's Heaven and Hell recommended in response to this question, though I haven't read it yet.

You can also consider searching for this question in the exmuslim subreddit— it's been asked many times so there are a lot of suggestions and resources over there.

 

[stillunemployed]

I was raised catholic, I have been baptized, gained holy communion and been confirmed and I lost my faith at the exact moment as the priest who confirmed me made it explicitly clear to me:

"I dont give a fuck. You keep coming to service and you keep making me happy and you can do whatever the fuck you want. I dont care. Just always remember :
I GET PAID.
Jesus, Holy Father and The Holy ghost. Thats pussy bullshit. Dont say any of that shit to me because I know more than you ever will."

I stopped going, my father hated my guts, which was actually an improvement for our relationship.

The priest was arrested and put on trial for making unsolicited sexual advances on a minor, a few years later. He only got 5 years probation, but lost his job.

If hell exist, its probably this existence.