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I'm truly tired of living. I have a plan that I tend to go through with this year. Yet, I'm scared? Death scares me. To be honest, the thought of what comes after terrifies me. I'm not religious by any means (Agnostic). Yet, I find myself being scared of some sort of punishment if I CTB? Or more so, the fear of the unknown. I realize how stupid this is, considering I've given up entirely. I would like to just hear some opinions. How can I let this fear go?
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Namelesa, ijustwishtodie, Andrew10 and 2 others
I feel the same way, even though I have no expectations for what comes after death, I'm still scared that when I CTB things might just get worse instead of better. The only way I've found to make peace with it is trying to convince myself that there's nothing after the bus.
Do you remember the billions of years before you were born? No, and did it bother you? No, we werent aware then. That's the answer. If it didn't bother you then, why would it bother you for the billions of years that'll come after death that we won't play apart of. It's a natural process, and shouldn't be something to be afraid of. We are wired to hate pain which is understandable, and are more so wired to do anything to avoid death, hence the SI. Death in fact is not a Curse, but a blessing and its a hard bridge to cross. I've made peace with my end, now it's picking the time.
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parasite_eve, Namelesa, pthnrdnojvsc and 2 others
For me personally non-existence is the only peace, I believe death to simply just be an eternal, dreamless sleep which is all I wish and hope for, I just want to never suffer in this existence ever again and I'd be so relieved to be permanently unconscious with all finally gone and forgotten about for me, only non-existence can bring me peace as after all only in the absence of existence will I be unable to suffer, there's no suffering in what I personally see as the only ideal state which is non-existence.
I see existence as an abomination that just causes harm and suffering, I find it deeply undesirable to exist, existence really does just feel like a cruel, terrible mistake to me and I find it so tragic how this existence was even imposed at all. I'd always prefer to not exist than be enslaved in this horrfic reality where there is all this endless suffering and cruelty capable of suffering to unlimited amounts destined to decay and die anyway, the thought of being trapped in this existence just to die tortured by old age is so unbearable to me.
I feel the same way, even though I have no expectations for what comes after death, I'm still scared that when I CTB things might just get worse instead of better. The only way I've found to make peace with it is trying to convince myself that there's nothing after the bus.
Nothing would be preferable to an undesirable something, so if there is something, may it be desirable and pleasurable. However, I'm fairly convinced it's going to be nothing. I'll be supremely surprised if in the next existence (if in the unlikely chance there is one) I'm somehow conscious of the previous one. As to whether it matters how it unfolds, whether at my own hands or from a "natural" death, I don't think that's going to make much of a difference. At least that's my opinion.
Do you remember the billions of years before you were born? No, and did it bother you? No, we werent aware then. That's the answer. If it didn't bother you then, why would it bother you for the billions of years that'll come after death that we won't play apart of. It's a natural process, and shouldn't be something to be afraid of. We are wired to hate pain which is understandable, and are more so wired to do anything to avoid death, hence the SI. Death in fact is not a Curse, but a blessing and its a hard bridge to cross. I've made peace with my end, now it's picking the time.
Well, I also don't remember being in the womb so simply not remembering something doesn't mean I didn't exist or what that existence entailed. Sorry, I'm just able to see the loopholes. I haven't found anything that brings comfort about it. We have no idea what comes next, if anything. But since I'm alive right now odds are in my favor I will probably live again.
Do you remember the billions of years before you were born? No, and did it bother you? No, we werent aware then. That's the answer. If it didn't bother you then, why would it bother you for the billions of years that'll come after death that we won't play apart of. It's a natural process, and shouldn't be something to be afraid of. We are wired to hate pain which is understandable, and are more so wired to do anything to avoid death, hence the SI. Death in fact is not a Curse, but a blessing and its a hard bridge to cross. I've made peace with my end, now it's picking the time.
This!! It's nice to see somebody who actually gets it considering how even most people on here imo seem to view death itself as a tragedy when I personally think that it's a blessing. There is no harm in permanent non existence. Death isn't bad to the being who has died since they are no longer subject to any pain and the pleasures that they are supposedly missing out on are irrelevant since dead people don't care about that since there is no "me" in death. These experiential life that we are going through right now is merely a by product of the brain.
Obviously I'm scared of the dying process due to SI as well as worrying about my attempt potentially failing but, at the end of the day, I'm not scared of death itself but merely the pathway to get there
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