how to deal with occational darkness inside

[hope2di]

there are days when the pain just overwhelms me. Even cutting myself hurts less. And the pain and darkness just hit me like a wave and there is nothing I can do to stop it.
What do you do when the darkness hits you? How do you get out?

 

[catmom13]

I've felt the darkness inside for almost two decades now. It hasn't gone but I've learned to...as the young kids say, "vibe" with it. It exists inside and I know it's there, but I put up roadblocks that are a combination of coping mechanisms that I've learned in therapy and things that I came up with. I still have moments when I drown, but not as often as before.

One of my favorites is, "this time tomorrow". Basically you give it a deadline, it doesn't have to be exactly tomorrow. This started when I was overwhelmed with school work in university; I realized that this time after the deadline(usually the next day because I would procrastinate) I wouldn't be feeling this way, so why go through the experience twice? It's not an all-around roadblock but it allows me to put things into perspective.

Do you have access to a therapist? Even though I didn't like the ones I had, I did learn coping mechanisms that helped my days go by better. These skills will help you rise above the darkness and ride the waves.

 

[Sherri]

When I have dark days I try and get out of the house, go for a drive or even a small walk to the pharmacy, with full lockdown is one of the few places I can go. Then I become a bit better, Netflix helps a bit also. Or even writing a diary something I just started. Wish you the best, I'm always here if you need to chat when you feel dark. A big hug to you.

 

[EraseRewind]

Those dark times and thoughts seem to be inevitable for me, I have accepted that I'm not likely to recover from my mental issues but I can help myself by accepting my conditions and all of the consequences that have come from my issues. I agree with all of the tools in the previous posts and I especially like to get out of the house with my dog, my profile picture shows one the views out there and it reminds me there is something bigger than me at work in the world.

I have long accepted that my conditions and consequences are a punishment for my errors in life and since accepting that my depressive and anxiety attacks have lessened, even in the f*in lockdown.

I had to stop drinking nearly six years ago because I was a chronic alcoholic and my life was out of control, it was either going to be prison, slow lingering death or prison then death, that was how I dealt with my issues in the past getting pissed every day. So now I just live one day at a time and that works, tomorrow is another day.

 

[BeansOfRequirement]

I've said this a few times but the first and most important step is always to recognize, evaluate and accept the current situation. Not quickly jumping to "solutions", can be compared to not moving when you feel pain in your knees when meditating.

 

[Makko]

I get away from any pain by derealizing. No darkness can get me when I'm not at home.

 

[hope2di]

I've felt the darkness inside for almost two decades now. It hasn't gone but I've learned to...as the young kids say, "vibe" with it. It exists inside and I know it's there, but I put up roadblocks that are a combination of coping mechanisms that I've learned in therapy and things that I came up with. I still have moments when I drown, but not as often as before.

One of my favorites is, "this time tomorrow". Basically you give it a deadline, it doesn't have to be exactly tomorrow. This started when I was overwhelmed with school work in university; I realized that this time after the deadline(usually the next day because I would procrastinate) I wouldn't be feeling this way, so why go through the experience twice? It's not an all-around roadblock but it allows me to put things into perspective.

Do you have access to a therapist? Even though I didn't like the ones I had, I did learn coping mechanisms that helped my days go by better. These skills will help you rise above the darkness and ride the waves.

Thank you very much! This sounds like a good approach. No therapist just yet. I dont know how to talk to one after holding it all inside me for so long, and I am worried she or he might try to stop me if I decide to take the next step.

When I have dark days I try and get out of the house, go for a drive or even a small walk to the pharmacy, with full lockdown is one of the few places I can go. Then I become a bit better, Netflix helps a bit also. Or even writing a diary something I just started. Wish you the best, I'm always here if you need to chat when you feel dark. A big hug to you.

Thank you very much!