How to beat SI and drink SN?

[LifeSucks39]

How to beat SI ?

 

[MariV]

what is SI?

 

[miguel6565]

what is SI?

Survival instinct

 

[MariV]

matter of suffering hard enough...guess ure still not at that point
also think that death is happening anyway...sooner or later..it doesnt mind

 

[Niirvana]

Im affraid to vomit, my stomach is sensitive

 

[Mr2005]

Is that all it is? You instinctively rejecting it because it's poison or do you actually want to live and just don't know how?

 

[miguel6565]

Is that all it is? You instinctively rejecting it because it's poison or do you actually want to live and just don't know how?

Great question

 

[Mr2005]

Great question

Thanks. I wasn't sure

 

[Wayfaerer]

Is that all it is? You instinctively rejecting it because it's poison or do you actually want to live and just don't know how?

I was like that at one point. I wasn't overly suicidal but I just didn't know how to live. I'm well past that now, so all that's left to do is to be able to convince my subconscious of that.

 

[Sinkinshyp]

I almost have my full plan in place for Oct 13. Theres somethings I still need to plan but most of it is there, the important parts anyway. Having my SN sitting in my room for a week has been a challenge not to go drink it. I've wanted out for almost 3 years since my son died. I don't want my family to have 2 painful days so I choose to go on the one my sons accident was.

Until I am face with my glasses of SN I honestly cannot say how I will feel. I think the only thing that would hold me back is thinking of the harm I could potentially be doing to soon to be 20 yr old son. I have no SI nothing left to live for. Once I get past the thoughts of my younger son I am pretty confident I will chug and smile, wait 5 minutes chug smile chocolate lay back in bed and go smiling.

 

[MariV]

I almost have my full plan in place for Oct 13. Theres somethings I still need to plan but most of it is there, the important parts anyway. Having my SN sitting in my room for a week has been a challenge not to go drink it. I've wanted out for almost 3 years since my son died. I don't want my family to have 2 painful days so I choose to go on the one my sons accident was.

Until I am face with my glasses of SN I honestly cannot say how I will feel. I think the only thing that would hold me back is thinking of the harm I could potentially be doing to soon to be 20 yr old son. I have no SI nothing left to live for. Once I get past the thoughts of my younger son I am pretty confident I will chug and smile, wait 5 minutes chug smile chocolate lay back in bed and go smiling.

so sorry about ur situation. if its 3 years already that you want to do it then its definitely not an impulse. have you told your son about your plans? i think its better if they know. good luck

 

[Sinkinshyp]

so sorry about ur situation. if its 3 years already that you want to do it then its definitely not an impulse. have you told your son about your plans? i think its better if they know. good luck

when my older son died in his car accident I instantly shattered. The strong woman mother I had spent the last 25 years 4 months and 2 days being- was someone I will never become again. My younger son was 3 months before turning 17. he tested out HIGHLY intelligent, has always been stubborn, independent and an introvert. He turned 18 and 3 months later ran to my ex in laws. I cannot blame him- he had to watch me over medicate, scream in hysterics all day I want my son- I want to die. I even in my broken mental state asked his permission to kill myself. He listened to it for a yr and a half before he moved out. I am sure he has expected it to come long before now. I freely post to facebook about I cannot wait to join my older son. I love both my kids equally. They each share half my heart and soul. I have hung in here for my younger son. I no longer have a reason to... so yes I'm sure he expects that call every day your mothers gone