Eole2.0

Eole2.0

LF FR/German CTB partner
Aug 27, 2024
96
As far as I remember, I was always very succeptible. It goes back to childhood, the inner circle of family was impossible to live without suffering a single remark in less than a minute. Since the water has poured under the bridges as they say but from then I suffer a remark that is not founded on behalf of my family I spin. Do you have any idea how I could be less likely, or at least a way to work with that?
I'm anti-psychologists, I've seen too much already, so I wish I had a more intimate way of being able to control that.
Thank you in advance
 
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-Link-

-Link-

Deep Breaths
Aug 25, 2018
391
One thing I'd look at is self-affirmation. Low self-esteem as a likely problem, would put an extra sting in the words of others. You want to build yourself up in your own mind. Realize you're worth it. Believe you're lovable. See your potential. To reach such a point would take a lot of hurt out of others' words. You could go to Google and look for self-guided programs towards improving self-esteem. ChatGPT may be something to consult on this as well.

If what occurred in your childhood was tantamount to abuse of any kind, then this could be more trauma-based and run all the way down to your very core, almost certainly requiring the input and guidance of mental health professionals. If you have an aversion to psychiatry, there could be ways to overcome that as well, but that would depend on the reasons for this aversion.

Personalization: You'd want to check yourself for personalizing the words or actions of other people. Most often, what people say and do is more a reflection upon themselves and what's going on in their own minds rather than anything specifically to do with you. Avoid taking ownership of another person's thoughts and reactions, and especially try to avoid personalizing someone else's snap judgements.

This could also be related to a personality trait -- that of a "highly sensitive person" (HSP). This is only regarded as a trait rather than a problem that needs correcting. If you Google that term and do some reading on it and find you identify with it, it would be very helpful to research it and learn more about yourself and why you react to other people in such a way.

These are just some thoughts about potential ways to approach this. I do wish you very well in finding answers.
 
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Eole2.0

Eole2.0

LF FR/German CTB partner
Aug 27, 2024
96
Thanks you very much, it was so complete and helpful.
I'll research about HSP , you're probably right 🥺
 
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loneliness0

loneliness0

Member
Oct 13, 2023
40
Link already written really good advice.

I would only add, personalization seem same or very similar to projections.
We all project our insecurities and inner world onto other people, I always says in my life in situations where someone speaks off their ass - "projections comes first". Their words and actions comes from projections first.

Another thing, as hard as it sounds establishing boundaries is very important but sometimes with some people very hard to impossible. We teach other people what behavior we are accepting and what we are not accepting. And when we try establish new boundaries in already existing relationships because we have decided that we are not accepting some things anyone in our life due to higher self esteem or other positive chanhes, other person can get upset as he benefits in lack of boundaries and them being able act how they acting so far towards you with no consequences.

Hope you have good day. And happy you are with us here.
 
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Eole2.0

Eole2.0

LF FR/German CTB partner
Aug 27, 2024
96
I really don't have words about your diagnosis ( both )
I ever had issue with that. Youth, works and relations.
I'm not enough confident, even now with my neighbours. I have some bad conditions due to self harming and attempts. I know they talk about me between them but it's hard for me to hear that 😭

Anyway. Your words let me guess finaly i'm not single ( here) and it pleasure me.

Thanks you 🙏
 

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