how much of a loser am i (be honest)

[sick.faery]

again before saying wanna precise that i'm drunk, so if i say weird shit you know why

anyways i'm 22, only did 6 months of high school, no diploma, never went to college, no job ever, no friends, no bf, havent had sex in 4 years (have like 12 people in that way though. last time i was 18 lol. some of them were old as fuck then like in their 50s...). have ptsd, bdd, eating problems, only things i ever do is watch youtube, netflix, social media and dance. only thing i got is that my parents are pretty rich and work for governments and stuff. i have really bad hygiene cos of depression and suicidaliy, but if i got outside i'll be so clean and dress in designer shit and like i'm doing a fashion show lol. no idea how hot i am or not hot i am cos i have disorders to do with looks but most people i fucked were hot so maybe i'm cute lol

 

[WorthlessTrash]

As much as i hate giving validation to people whom are better/in a much better spot than me, i'll bite. Youre probably an attractive woman. Therefore you're by default not loser. Lack of education doesn't make you loser and you at least have things going for you.

There's the brutal honesty. You're welcome.

 

[Pluto]

We have to look at the cause of your PTSD and how it affected you. The fact that you've found yourself in this situation is probably an indictment on many elders in your community who were tasked with caring for you during formative years. This leads to self-destructive patterns. It sounds to me like a lot can be done about the situation.

 

[The anhedonic one]

again before saying wanna precise that i'm drunk, so if i say weird shit you know why

anyways i'm 22, only did 6 months of high school, no diploma, never went to college, no job ever, no friends, no bf, havent had sex in 4 years (have like 12 people in that way though. last time i was 18 lol. some of them were old as fuck then like in their 50s...). have ptsd, bdd, eating problems, only things i ever do is watch youtube, netflix, social media and dance. only thing i got is that my parents are pretty rich and work for governments and stuff. i have really bad hygiene cos of depression and suicidaliy, but if i got outside i'll be so clean and dress in designer shit and like i'm doing a fashion show lol. no idea how hot i am or not hot i am cos i have disorders to do with looks but most people i fucked were hot so maybe i'm cute lol

Maybe PTSD is causing you to have a negative self image of yourself. I have PTSD and it makes me feel very insecure about myself.
I guess you could go to a few bars and see how many people try to hit on you to gauge how attractive you really are.

 

[leloyon]

Nope.
Your parents are rich so I take that as "I don't have to work since my parents will keep me afloat" and clearly you can get laid, which suggests you are at least moderately attractive and can function socially.
If only you knew how bad things really are for the rest of us.

 

[Pluto]

Urban Dictionary: Misery Olympics

Comparing your struggles to others who are complaining about their own issues. Popularly used to undermine the importance of someone’s struggle, or to make something miserable look like it is over exaggerated or weak for complaining.

www.urbandictionary.com

 

[OceanBlue]

Losers are mainly those who willingly procreate, so you're not a loser. Hope you feel better soon, at least your basic needs are met.
Could be worse is something I often remind myself.

 

[leloyon]

Urban Dictionary: Misery Olympics

Comparing your struggles to others who are complaining about their own issues. Popularly used to undermine the importance of someone’s struggle, or to make something miserable look like it is over exaggerated or weak for complaining.

www.urbandictionary.com

Huh. I usually talk about my own struggles when someone is venting to me, I just suck at comforting people and felt that perhaps showing that I'm in a similar situation might comfort them.

 

[WorthlessTrash]

Urban Dictionary: Misery Olympics

Comparing your struggles to others who are complaining about their own issues. Popularly used to undermine the importance of someone’s struggle, or to make something miserable look like it is over exaggerated or weak for complaining.

www.urbandictionary.com

Tbh there are some people whom are on here but objectively privileged compared to others. It's natural to point out that they have it better than us for one reason or another.

 

[Forever Sleep]

How do you define a 'loser'? Someone who doesn't comply with societies expectations? Someone who's lost (usually everything) or- nearly everything?

I don't know really. I think 'losers' gain a bad reputation because they're seen as being lazy. Maybe they sponge off of society or other people. There again- when you look at society, you look at our corrupt governments- you have to wonder- why are we paying into this?!! Maybe the 'losers' have the right idea.

From your case though- it's clear you have stuff going on in your life that's made it difficult for you. You're financially supported perhaps but maybe haven't been in other ways. Who knows where other people would be if they had your life. None of us know. We shouldn't really judge. What's important is what you feel and what you want. If YOU think you're a loser and it's bothering you- then, I guess you need to work out what you want to achieve in life- or- don't. It's up to you.

 

[Pluto]

Huh. I usually talk about my own struggles when someone is venting to me, I just suck at comforting people and felt that perhaps showing that I'm in a similar situation might comfort them.

Yes, this is a good thing so long as the intention behind it is camaraderie, not invalidation. It is very helpful for someone to know that others are going through the same struggle, but being told that their problems are trivial compared to someone else is going to cause further hurt. Hopefully this distinction is clear.

Tbh there are some people whom are on here but objectively privileged compared to others. It's natural to point out that they have it better than us for one reason or another.

So then I should point out your privileged lifestyle compared to Nessie in the war zone of Ukraine?

Anyway, back to the OP's topic. When I was 22, I was living with my parents, who were not wealthy but provided me with food and shelter. I hadn't finished high school due to cracking under the pressure of bullying at home and school. I spent all my time on the internet and had no motivation and no direction in life. To outsiders, I looked like a lazy, entitled brat, taking it easy and leeching off others. I had to hide my situation or else people would feel all sorts of aggression towards me. But the truth was much darker.

My fucked up parents had completely brainwashed me into believing myself incapable of working, connecting with others or functioning independently. My only close friend of the time used the analogy that it's like I was chained up in a basement, and the people in the family would come along and take turns in whipping me. Many years later I got my first proper job, and was struggling to believe that I was real. Only then did I realise I had been lied to all along, and I might have been socially active and reasonably successful if I were not tightly controlled by a sadistic family.

I can't say if this is what is happening in the OP's case, but I find myself wondering about the character of the parents just based on the little that has been shared.

 

[WorthlessTrash]

So then I should point out your privileged lifestyle compared to Nessie in the war zone of Ukraine?

The war in Ukraine is irrelevant to this. The OP made a post and has everything that the majority of us on this thread have to live without. There is nothing wrong with pointing out how much better they have it than us. They opened the door by making the thread in the first place, and asked for our honest opinions. and we were honest about it.