A

Allan that was

Member
Feb 20, 2020
18
To give some backstory I've been in and out of therapy for these last year's and honestly the experience has been absolutely horrible, I've had three different shrinks and I've hated every one of them. Where now I have no idea how to approach them in meaningful way. When I first tried to reach for professional help when I was 18 the receptionist essentially threatened to have me comitted in the most condescending tone unless I dialed back all my claims and agreed to be put at the back of the waiting list. After that I ve kinda been scared to actually tell them the full story and maybe as a result I don't know if they have fully taken me seriously. I don't know what to do and I feel so tired when imagining starting over again.
 
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Weather

Weather

Student
Oct 18, 2020
152
If you don't feel that you can be honest with your psychiatrist or therapist... they are not the one for you. I know you don't want to start over, but your effort should be worth something, and it doesn't sound like it is.

I don't want to make this about me, but I have been able to be open with mine, even about suicidal feelings. He agrees that hospitalization is counterproductive for me and trusts me to tell him when I am not doing well. He has "contracted" with me (lame, I know) that I will not hurt myself for X hours, and then checks in over the phone at that point to renew the contract.
 
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D

Deleted member 1465

_
Jul 31, 2018
6,914
I know some people on here have had good relationships with professionals and trust them, so I don't discount that it's possible.
It's not my experience, however. I regret 'opening up' and being honest. It brought me nothing but what i regard as legitimised abuse.
I'd say to trust your instincts; if it feels wrong, then it probably is. If you meet a professional who you trust as a person, then it may work out better for you than it did for me.
Whether you can be completely honest? Not without risking sacrificing your freedom. So you can be honest with them up to a point, but if you admit certain things then they have a mandated duty of care to 'look after you.' If that is what you want or feel you need, then you can indeed be completely honest.
 
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Life_and_Death

Life_and_Death

Do what's best for you 🕯️ Right now, I'm stressed
Jul 1, 2020
6,897
My first therapist didn't listen to me. My second therapist so far has been good and I told my psychiatrist that I'm physically violent towards myself and others... Nothing happened. Might I add however that I did back the last thing up with proof I'm trying to change and stop that providing no reason to hospitalize me.
 
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WhiteDespair

WhiteDespair

The Temporary Problem is Life
Oct 24, 2019
837
@Life_and_Death nice Slipknot

I'm pretty honest with my therapists. I know I can get closed up at times but I try to be honest. A big part of honesty is the self confidence required for honesty. You can try some small honesty and gauge the reaction.
 
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M

maybepossiblyithink

Member
Oct 22, 2020
57
Every time I even once mentioned being suicidal all they wanted to do was lock me up. So I stopped mentioning anything about that.
I think now that I'm an adult they can't force me, but I still don't think I could say it. At least in my experience, that place was god awful.

Other than that, I can be very honest and open.
It depends on your therapist I think
 
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WhiteDespair

WhiteDespair

The Temporary Problem is Life
Oct 24, 2019
837
Every time I even once mentioned being suicidal all they wanted to do was lock me up. So I stopped mentioning anything about that.
I think now that I'm an adult they can't force me, but I still don't think I could say it. At least in my experience, that place was god awful.

Other than that, I can be very honest and open.
It depends on your therapist I think
I've found that past tense CtB language allows me to be honest about it. "I was feeling CtB this week" makes it seem like it's not happening at the current time but allows me to bring it up.
 
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M

maybepossiblyithink

Member
Oct 22, 2020
57
I've found that past tense CtB language allows me to be honest about it. "I was feeling CtB this week" makes it seem like it's not happening at the current time but allows me to bring it up.
I get what you mean. Esp when is comes to SH. I can't say what or when. I have to say I relapsed or some other kind of replacement language.
 
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kappa

kappa

Experienced
Apr 2, 2019
233
If they feel you are a threat to yourself or others they can have you committed. You have to be careful with your words.
 
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Reiraku

Reiraku

Member
May 5, 2020
69
When I first tried to reach for professional help when I was 18 the receptionist essentially threatened to have me comitted in the most condescending tone
Something similar happened to me as well, but it was the shrink who told me this after our first meeting. It was maybe 3-4 years ago. Had to wait like half a year for an appointment and was stupid back then (I mean, more than now), so I told her everything in an unblemished manner. Then she hit me with what you described. That was my first and last experience, I stopped going to that bitch :ahhha:. Seems we both only got bad experiences with them. My current stance is that you can't and shouldn't be honest and if you can't be honest with a psychiatrist, there is no point in going there. Maybe if you find someone like that shrink from Good Will Hunting who really tries to understand and cares about you, but I don't feel like having to go through one shit psychiatrist after the next just to find that one good one that might not even be out there.
 
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W

whywere

Illuminated
Jun 26, 2020
3,012
For me, hate to say it, but my experience with them is almost always about $$$$. Had one tell me to enroll in a year long program and I was told if i did not then I was kicked out.So I did nothing and got kicked out. After that I am VERY selective in saying anything at all. I now get my meds from my family doctor and stay away from the psych people.
 
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AJ95

AJ95

24/7 sylvia plath
Sep 3, 2020
478
I can usually tiptoe around getting committed, it's important to be able to pick up on their vibes and to try and guess what they might be thinking.

Like I have a good relationship with both of the therapists I see and I'm comfortable with saying that I feel suicidal, that I've lost all hope, and that I've been researching methods online. But as soon as the "do you have a plan?" question comes up I deflect it or deny anything about it.

It might be different in other countries but as far as I'm aware here in Australia you can only be committed if you're an active and immediate danger to yourself or others, so if you deny having a plan to kill yourself then you're gucci, you can say you're thinking about it nonstop.

Obviously though your mileage may vary, I probably wouldn't be this open with a random hospital psychiatrist.
 
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M

maybepossiblyithink

Member
Oct 22, 2020
57
I can usually tiptoe around getting committed, it's important to be able to pick up on their vibes and to try and guess what they might be thinking.

Like I have a good relationship with both of the therapists I see and I'm comfortable with saying that I feel suicidal, that I've lost all hope, and that I've been researching methods online. But as soon as the "do you have a plan?" question comes up I deflect it or deny anything about it.

It might be different in other countries but as far as I'm aware here in Australia you can only be committed if you're an active and immediate danger to yourself or others, so if you deny having a plan to kill yourself then you're gucci, you can say you're thinking about it nonstop.

Obviously though your mileage may vary, I probably wouldn't be this open with a random hospital psychiatrist.
Exactly. I live in the US but, theres only one hospital like that in my city. They hire people off the street to work as staff besides the nurses and therapists. You got to see your therapist once a week.
Also the process of getting commited is absolutely terrifying. I was waiting in the room with my mom for 6 hours before I was taken upstairs. They put kids with anxiety disorders, depression, etc, in the same room with drug addicts or people with anger issues. It was terrifying. How are you supposed to heal and open up to people in a place where you're even more miserable than before?
 
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Lilacmoon

Lilacmoon

Beautiful moon, take me away.
Sep 23, 2020
1,308
too risky. im never going back to the psych ward if i can help it.
 
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MichaelNomad123

MichaelNomad123

Jesus
Oct 15, 2020
433
As someone has already mentioned here, if you feel like you cannot trust your therapist then your therapist is not for you. If you feel as if you cannot trust any therapist at all, then perhaps you need to do some introspection and assess whether or not therapy is your path. A therapist is paid to help you. They are often very passionate about their jobs. It's a long and difficult road to get into social care and those that choose the career have often been afflicted themselves by depression or otherwise and/or have been close to someone that have been afflicted by a mental health issue. That's not to say that you should listen to everything that they say but it does help with trust, at least it did for me. Food for though, y'know?

As for mentioning ctb with your therapist, I think the professional response is to assess your intent. If you mention that you have a plan, they will try and stop you or interfere in some way. That is their professional responsibility. If you have a history of attempts, then they will take you very seriously. If you are just talking about ctb without any real plan, a good therapist will just humour your thought process.
 
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Y

Yiyo123

Member
Apr 24, 2020
93
I'm honest with both my psychiatrist and psychologits. I'm been with both of them
for more than 8 years. But I don't talk too much so they kind of make me talk... ask a lot of questions. When I feel very suicidal I usually don't say otherwise i'll be hospitalized (which I hate).
 
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Disappointered

Disappointered

Enlightened
Sep 21, 2020
1,283
The main reason you can never be 100% honest with a therapist is that most of them are parasites preying on vulnerable people. They take money (sometimes directly out of your pocket) to stroke their ego if you're lucky and abuse you if you're not, while pretending to themselves they're in a special priestly authoritative caste with magical expertise that they expect you to go along with. People like them are the reason you need to find someone to help you so then you find yourself in their office, whereupon you now pay people like them to get off on putting you down, like psychopathic vampires really. It's such a scandalous shitshow but so many people are so unhappy in this world of modernist progress and pluralism that they keep needing to find someone who might help them, thereby keeping the parasites in power. I can't believe it's been going on this long.
 
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141592653

141592653

TW She/Her
Aug 9, 2020
119
The main reason you can never be 100% honest with a therapist is that most of them are parasites preying on vulnerable people. They take money (sometimes directly out of your pocket) to stroke their ego if you're lucky and abuse you if you're not, while pretending to themselves they're in a special priestly authoritative caste with magical expertise that they expect you to go along with. People like them are the reason you need to find someone to help you so then you find yourself in their office, whereupon you now pay people like them to get off on putting you down, like psychopathic vampires really. It's such a scandalous shitshow but so many people are so unhappy in this world of modernist progress and pluralism that they keep needing to find someone who might help them, thereby keeping the parasites in power. I can't believe it's been going on this long.
Even if I hate psychiatry, therapy world is very different in France from psychiatry and to me this is a very biased comment. Lots of therapists are actually TRYING to help. They still need to live so if they don't get paid by you, they would do it on their spare time and since people are too selfish to do that, therapy would not even exist. If your state does not provide therapists freely, you should spit on your government and not on them. But I want to be understood, I'm not saying that they are actually helping.
 
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ready 2 go

ready 2 go

done with life
Apr 16, 2020
50
Anytime I've been 100% honest, I've been locked up, detained or had my hospital stay prolonged. Never found I professional I could say anything too
 
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Disappointered

Disappointered

Enlightened
Sep 21, 2020
1,283
Even if I hate psychiatry, therapy world is very different in France from psychiatry and to me this is a very biased comment. Lots of therapists are actually TRYING to help. They still need to live so if they don't get paid by you, they would do it on their spare time and since people are too selfish to do that, therapy would not even exist. If your state does not provide therapists freely, you should spit on your government and not on them. But I want to be understood, I'm not saying that they are actually helping.

Well I agree with you about one thing: therapists are selfish.
 
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I

itachi of death

Student
Aug 17, 2020
139
Just someone's educated guess on what they hear,people have been diagnosed with the wrong thing for years,apparently I had anxiety and I never knew and no one ever told me till I figured it out
 
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G

gcarb

Member
Oct 26, 2020
24
psychiatrists and therapists are dumb huamans, tbh. Their only use is to prescribe antidepressants for me. other than that they are simply retarded.
 
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Ren Elsie Jewelria

Ren Elsie Jewelria

I sneezed!
Aug 30, 2020
373
They are sheeple. They are not capable of understanding or empathy. They will rat you out and put you in a mental ward when they run out of BS answers from a handbook.
 
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G

gcarb

Member
Oct 26, 2020
24
They are sheeple. They are not capable of understanding or empathy. They will rat you out and put you in a mental ward when they run out of BS answers from a handbook.
exactly, they just regurgitate stuff they read in a book, they don't have an experiential understanding, and nor are they capable of it, they are the dumb medical students who were too pussy for a surgery and too dumb for derma or radiology.
 
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A

Allan that was

Member
Feb 20, 2020
18
Well this turned out to be my biggest thread on this forum. Thanks for answering guys. Overall the picture seems kinda bleak in regards to therapy. I was kinda hoping that my bad experience was more unique but bad stuff seems to be pretty universal here.
 
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MichaelNomad123

MichaelNomad123

Jesus
Oct 15, 2020
433
Well this turned out to be my biggest thread on this forum. Thanks for answering guys. Overall the picture seems kinda bleak in regards to therapy. I was kinda hoping that my bad experience was more unique but bad stuff seems to be pretty universal here.
In a place like this, this would be true yes. The problem is that you don't hear about successful therapy because it's successful. Similarly, people are typically very private about their vulnerabilities.
 
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Meretlein

Meretlein

Moderator
Feb 15, 2019
1,199
Never mention harming yourself to them or you risk being committed.

Just be aware that they add everything to your electronic medical records for life. Any doctor using the same recording software can see it.
 
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Squiddy

Squiddy

Here Lies My Hopes And Dreams
Sep 4, 2019
5,903
Never mention harming yourself to them or you risk being committed.

Just be aware that they add everything to your electronic medical records for life. Any doctor using the same recording software can see it.
I guess it depends on the psych professional because when I mention how I want to harm myself, they ask me how severe is it and if I need to go to the hospital which I decline
 
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Meretlein

Meretlein

Moderator
Feb 15, 2019
1,199
I guess it depends on the psych professional because when I mention how I want to harm myself, they ask me how severe is it and if I need to go to the hospital which I decline

Being open about my self harm as a teenager blew up in my face. Once they have that in your records, it will be easier to put you in a psych ward in the future.

I wasn't put there for cutting in the moment. My family got in a fight but dumb ass sister was worried I would hurt myself so she calls goes into my house and calls me out of the room while making it clear she was talking to the police or mental hospital. Leads to me freaking out and boom. Ruined our relationship and was the catalyst to me finding and joining SS.

It's best not to have a record of self harm but it is too late for anyone in this forum most likely lol.
 
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Sinkinshyp

Sinkinshyp

Paragon
Sep 7, 2020
947
I would keep going to as many therapists as you need to- to find your right one. No one takes my insurance. If they did I would go to as many as it took- I know not every therapist is the one for me just like meds I may need to try several. I know in my state I can say I have thought about suicide- I do not have an active plan. It's having a plan that they hospitalize you for
 

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