how does one just let go

[PoorlyTinted]

the biggest reason for my sadness and depression is that i keep on caring. i need to be able to let things wash over me and stop giving a fuck. but i keep on caring and thinking about everything and everyone. how do i let go of that last fuck i give. and stop caring

 

[shalashaska]

the biggest reason for my sadness and depression is that i keep on caring. i need to be able to let things wash over me and stop giving a fuck. but i keep on caring and thinking about everything and everyone. how do i let go of that last fuck i give. and stop caring

I love how you put this; letting go of "that last fuck" I have a similar "issue" because all of my friends and family know my defining quality is my empathy. Makes it hard to stop caring and stop feeling, even though I feel empty inside. It's insane how many feelings and emotions a human being is capable of feeling. We're never tied to one. But to answer your question, I have no idea. I've gotten into the habit of simply saying if someone or something doesn't have to have any involvement in my life or my head for that matter, then I just ignore it. Toss it to the back of my mind. This is easier said than done of course. Idk if that helps at all lol but i very much relate to what you are saying.

 

[FuneralCry]

I believe that it's difficult to force yourself to feel a certain way, it must be tiring being in that situation where you care too much. I do think that it can be hard to let go of feelings, but I guess that one can remind themselves of the true meaningless nature of life, how we are all destined to die and be forgotten about. Eventually everything that we experienced in life will be incapable of mattering to us.

 

[SilentSadness]

It is inevitable that you will experience irrational feelings, even when the rational fact is that life is meaningless. This is why so many people are still pro-life. As time passes though, everyone comes to accept the pointless nature of reality. I hope it's not too painful for you though and that you find the peace you seek.

 

[lemondeath]

the biggest reason for my sadness and depression is that i keep on caring. i need to be able to let things wash over me and stop giving a fuck. but i keep on caring and thinking about everything and everyone. how do i let go of that last fuck i give. and stop caring

for me everything reached a point where my brain just snapped and now I don't plan to ctb because I'm sad, but because I'm ready to. I would recommend thinking about your reason for living, and your reason for ctb. you can have a reason for both, or not have a reason to live but still not have a reason to ctb.

knowing why you do what you do might be the first step at letting go.

 

[AllMyDreams]

the biggest reason for my sadness and depression is that i keep on caring. i need to be able to let things wash over me and stop giving a fuck. but i keep on caring and thinking about everything and everyone. how do i let go of that last fuck i give. and stop caring

You have to unconditionally love yourself, and unconditionally accept all that happens in your life. It wasn't easy for me at first and is something unfortunately so few people do nowadays. But it basically boils down (at least for me) to a few things:

1. Good things that happen in my life are good, bad things are 'interesting'. Both are necessary for a full and complete life, as you can't appreciate the good without the bad. I can accept everything that happens for that reason.
2. I love myself, no matter what I do, I have value and bring something unique to the world, and I can forgive myself for mistakes I make. The fact that I am here, and so many other potential people never made it, is a special thing.
3. I can survive on my own without the approval of other people, because only I can always love and be there for myself. Only I can give myself a consistent reason to exist. But, life is richer with other people in it, and if good people come into my life I will welcome them.
4. It's good to have goals, and aspire for prestige or materialistic things, because that makes life interesting. But I do not solely depend on meeting my outside goals for happiness or survival.

Also, a big challenge for me was always thinking I was always at the center of attention, and that everyone was thinking about me. The truth is very few people think about you on a given day. It may not have seemed that way e.g., in school if you were bullied but it's absolutely true in the real world. And of those who do think about you, most of those people's opinions won't affect what you can do in life. If you internalize this it will help with your anxiety.

Also, one day you will be forgotten. Nobody alive will know you existed, just as we don't know any of the people that existed during early humanity, or if there was a world before us now. So no matter how bad things get, even if people do think of you badly, it will never last forever.

Wish you well. Lmk if you'd like to talk.

 

[PoorlyTinted]

thanks you all

 

[absolomonisgone]

the biggest reason for my sadness and depression is that i keep on caring. i need to be able to let things wash over me and stop giving a fuck. but i keep on caring and thinking about everything and everyone. how do i let go of that last fuck i give. and stop caring

It's normal and take a lot of time to overcome. It took 4 years to reach point of not caring but to do it well person must first ruin your life completely until no hope of things getting better for example I divorced quit job burned all my money so now no care ready to go on my birthday October 1. Prepared. No care. No worry