How do you picture the rest of your life if you decided to live it til the end?

[Kramer]

Mine scares me. My 20s have been awful and traumatic. My 30s will probably be similar. Then middle age will come and i'll feel the regrets of youth hit me hard. They already are now but there's a very small hope left.

I'm in my prime and yet I'm always afraid of being attacked in public, so I just stay home, which isn't fun. When I'm older, i'll be even more vulnerable and probably will be attacked. More trauma.

 

[Disappointered]

I'm always afraid of being attacked in public

How come?

 

[Kramer]

How come?

Because of abuse as a child probably. I look around though in public and see scrawny guys walking around without a care in the world. Now those are easy victims. I look tougher than that but don't feel carefree at all.

 

[Wisdom3_1-9]

This is perhaps the saddest activity I could engage in right now. Nonetheless, I'll bite...

I'll have to keep going to work in the job I hate, because no one will hire me again for a job I love.
My husband's disdain for me will continue to grow and he'll advance from exchanging photos with other men, to actually having sexual contact with them (if he hasn't already). He'll likely relapse again and either get another DWI and go to jail, or head to treatment.
I'll have to move because I can't stay in this community - too many people who hate me; too many memories of betrayal and heartbreak.
I'll have to try to rebuild my life somewhere else, but I'll never really be able to. I'll be sad and be lonely again. I'll probably start trying to hook up with others. As usual, I'll probably become attached to someone and I'll get my heart broken again.
I'll take up drugs and go overboard on them, and eventually die a rather painful death having overdosed on MDMA or something similar.
Most of the people I've known in my life won't even know that I died until months after.
And a few months after than, no one would remember me any more.

 

[_Kaira_]

Well if it will reflect my past, not good. Not good at all.

Unsure if I have a future, as I have so much weight on my shoulders to decide what will happen now.

If I keep going the way I am, bad things. Probably will end up homeless, too many variables after that.

 

[Fragile]

This is a really scary question, specially because the lives of the people in my family have been so terrible and full of debilitating illnesses. And I'm already experiencing the decline, both physical and cognitive in my mid 20's.

But if I somehow decide to live for some reason, I'll probably die in my 50's or even younger, after a life full of tragedy from the passing of family members and the non-functional state of my body, that's the age where both sides of my family get some form of cancer or their conditions worsen to the point of disability. I've seen it over and over, so many beloved people getting consumed by these illnesses.

I'm really glad that I won't have to live through that.

 

[GravityUtilizer]

Alone, mentally ill, always desperately poor. 'Livin' on a Prayer' but single.

 

[All washed up]

A lot worse than the first 55 years.
Single, unemployed, bored, etc

 

[Weary Soul]

With current circumstances, badly.

With better circumstances, advances in medicine, better.

But, I am out of time.

<3

 

[Ghost2211]

Once the kids are grown and out of the house I'll basically spend the remainder of my days in isolation getting stoned, eating unhealthy food, and gaming.

 

[Mr2005]

I do think about this. As shallow as it may seem if I knew I'd still look like this in another sixteen years it might soften the blow of losing the last sixteen. It seems unlikely though. I've got away with it thus far so see how much longer it lasts or just get out now? There's a few greys coming through so the rots bound to set in sooner or later unless I'm a vampire. Anyhow who cares? I'll never be happy. It'll still be 2021 and I'll still have to live with myself. I've wasted it once and feel compelled to do so again. Leave any mysterious of what could have been in the minds of others rather than my own. I really am a strong contender for the worst person who ever lived. Had a truly blessed life

 

[LenkaX]

I'm 37 now and I can't cope anymore. Every single hobby I had somehow burned out from me. The sooner I ctb, the better.

 

[Symbiote]

Once the kids are grown and out of the house I'll basically spend the remainder of my days in isolation getting stoned, eating unhealthy food, and gaming.

I'm hoping to enjoy that part of my life after I divorce her. Ride my bike, work, eat out a lot, and gaming.

 

[CoalmineCanary]

It's just blackness. It's empty.

 

[Ghost2211]

I'm hoping to enjoy that part of my life after I divorce her. Ride my bike, work, eat out a lot, and gaming.

I would too. I don't know if I'll ever get there though.

 

[Dead beat dad]

Mine scares me. My 20s have been awful and traumatic. My 30s will probably be similar. Then middle age will come and i'll feel the regrets of youth hit me hard. They already are now but there's a very small hope left.

I'm in my prime and yet I'm always afraid of being attacked in public, so I just stay home, which isn't fun. When I'm older, i'll be even more vulnerable and probably will be attacked. More trauma.

Honestly pretty boring.
I've lived through my prime and it was shit.
Life now is pretty shit and the prospect for the future is shit, so I have I think fairly realistic expectations.
The slight silver lining I guess is that the older you get, the faster time passes so if I don't ctb, I'll be old and decrepit in no time anyway.
DBD

 

[All washed up]

Honestly pretty boring.
I've lived through my prime and it was shit.
Life now is pretty shit and the prospect for the future is shit, so I have I think fairly realistic expectations.
The slight silver lining I guess is that the older you get, the faster time passes so if I don't ctb, I'll be old and decrepit in no time anyway.
DBD

I'm not so sure about this unfortunately.
My first 55 years were reasonably enjoyable for the most part and reasonably fast
The last 6 months have lasted forever and ever, unemployment, lockdowns etc.
I can't imagine how long another 20 or so years like this will feel

 

[JustLosingMyself]

Lonely, miserable and in pain.
Oh joy

 

[foxdie]

Alone and homeless probably.

 

[AutoTap]

To many things can change and it's to scary to think about. Probably still anxiety ridden and major depression

 

[Dead beat dad]

I'm not so sure about this unfortunately.
My first 55 years were reasonably enjoyable for the most part and reasonably fast
The last 6 months have lasted forever and ever, unemployment, lockdowns etc.
I can't imagine how long another 20 or so years like this will feel

Thanks for the heads up friend. Still I'm expecting shit and if another 30-40 years is the hand I'm dealt then I will always be comforted by the fact that infinity of time and space will make my lifetime irrelevant anyway
DBD

 

[mahakaliSS_MahaDurga]

I'm hoping to enjoy that part of my life after I divorce her. Ride my bike, work, eat out a lot, and gaming.

So happy to see you giving life another chance.

 

[NodusTollens]

There is no future, not really. From the time I was a child, I never dreamed about WHAT my life would be, only WHO I could be like. "If I was like *insert fictional character here* then I'd:
- have friends
- be happy
- have supportive parents

I can't see my future improving &I am tired of living like this.

 

[Nymph]

I can't even imagine it lol, there's no way it's gonna happen and I don't even want it to happen. There's no future for someone with this mental state

 

[MrBlue]

If I somehow don't end up killing myself, I'd imagine my self destructive tendencies will steadily increase with age, and I'll die in my 40/50's from compounding health problems caused by taking up smoking, drinking, drugs and whatever else I end up using to drown it all out. I don't imagine outliving my parents by much tbh.

 

[StringPuppet]

Painfully lonely

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

If I were to keep living then maybe if I'm lucky I'll meet someone when I'm in my late 30s. My emotional growth will still likely be stunted from being so lonely all these years but the person I'd marry would probably be like ten years younger and that would cause all sorts of problems especially when we have multiple kids one of whom is autistic and I'll never have a real job anyway I'd have to mooch off my sister for money. Being so much older than my kids would cause me to not understand them at all so they'd grow to hate me and I'll be in my 60s knowing I've doomed them to repeat the same cycle. Hopefully I go senile soon.

Oh wait, that's my dad's story, not mine. Yet. It's going to be if I keep being alive after 30 though so I'm going to stop that. Although in my case maybe I'd die anyway in my 40s and 50s from diabetes.

 

[ecmnesia]

i shouldn't indulge in this kind of though, but let's go.

to sum it up, miserable. cornered up by my parents expectations on me I will finish my graduation and then I will inevitably feel obligated to choose an specialization field. because of pressure i will also get my driver's license. and keep pretending to be functional, so you know, people don't see how abnormal i am. I will go to parties, cause my friends won't leave me alone, just so as soon as I get there I understand that i don't belong, and then i will feel like shit for the rest of the night and will drink until i can't stand, do something I regret and wake up the next day hatting myself. I will continue to self harm, while of course pretending nothing is going on, hiding my scars when summer comes. One day I will get a job, and i will enslave my self on it so I can make money to pay for a car i don't want and the perfect apartment i don't need, so that I can keep on pretending that i belong.

I am already tired of thinking about it. but that's how it will go... tch, i hope i die soon.

 

[Soul]

I will feel worse and worse until I die.

 

[Dagon]

I'll probably be lonely for the rest of my life. I'll have a few friends that I cherish, but they'll probably end up finding someone and the times when we all get to hang out will slowly start to dwindle. I'll probably end up living in a small one bedroom apartment and working a dead-end job until I die. I want to adopt a dog at some point, but knowing me, I'll probably end up making both of us miserable so maybe not. Oh and hopefully the occasional drug binges will end up shortening my lifespan.