Hi sweet
@onlyanimalsaregood
It's always difficult to give a miracle solution to get rid of emotions related to depression, mood disorders and anxiety.
Already, it is considered that the management of depression is based on 3 axes
-Medication (which seems to work on you, so antidepressants, anxiolytics...)
-Therapy (whether it's talking or approaches related to behaviour and thoughts to change what we call patterns. To give you an image, a schema is like glasses with a filter that makes you see the world according to the colour of the filter. These glasses (filter) will always generate the same thoughts. The objective is to find the theme of your pattern and to make it more flexible, to learn to counteract routine thoughts. For example, if you say to yourself (and I think you sometimes do) "I must look weird" "I'm rubbish" "I'm doing it wrong", you have to ask yourself "Am I really doing everything wrong, haven't I already succeeded in many things in my life?" (Even the most trivial things have to be considered, because you have to break the routine of thinking that the brain has got used to having)
-Motivation (it depends on the person, because to get out of depression is not easy, you have to fight against it relentlessly, motivate yourself to do sports, to do things you like, to smile)
We know, for example, thanks to several studies that the simple fact of forcing yourself to smile is enough to secrete neurotransmitters in the brain that are responsible for the feeling of joy.
We should not hesitate to talk about what makes us sad, to face the events that were traumatic in the past by addressing them deeply and accepting them.
I think about the loneliness you feel inside, because you said that no matter how much energy you put into someone, you always end up alone... Maybe the issues of rejection, abandonment and loneliness would be something to address to understand deep down why it hurts you so much
❤
You can also have fun noting 3x a day (morning, noon and evening) your mood (from 0 to 10. 10 being very happy and 0 being very sad), you will see that it fluctuates a lot and that sadness is not the only thing you feel!
Depression only makes you perceive negative things, I think that even if it's very complicated to live, you have to do as you already do, don't despair and stay courageous.
Don't forget that it's because of depression that you live things the way you do, knowing that it's not your fault but hers, you'll be able to distance yourself from her more easily!
Depression affects memory performance, attention, you are also slower. Brain imaging shows that the brain is less activated and produces fewer transmitters. Don't forget that, even if people tend to think so, you are not "slow, dazed or a sad person", it is the depression that lives its life through you.
What I like to say to people is that, since being in depression is very abstract, imagine yourself, facing a black human-looking figure, like a shadow. This shadow is depression and all that goes with it (fatigue, anxiety, sadness, anger, remorse, low self-esteem, shyness...).
Well, now imagine yourself beating her up, but really like you were in a ring, you're beating her up. Punch her in the face until she forfeits.
It's a good idea to have a concrete idea of a problem, it can also help sometimes
Don't despair and keep writing here about your feelings. As long as it helps you, we're fine with it
❤
I wish you the best, hang in there, the sky is blue but you can't see it yet because of all those clouds!
PS: I sent you a DM, and even another one a while ago, I don't know if you saw them!
Love ❤
