How do I deal with craving sex but also being disgusted by it?

[Weebster]

I have ocd. I can't handle bad smells. Female bodies (I'm straight) that aren't fit repulse me in a sexual context. Anal anything is unthinkable to me. Whenever I have sex, it's good until my ocd kicks in, which can happen at anytime.

 

[whatevs]

As long as you have this hygiene-related OCD you won't feel comfortable with sex. It's actually an objectively repulsive activity. In a normal brain disgust is temporarily overridden by lust when it comes to sex, but sexual organs and emissions have most of the traits that make something disgusting. If someone had no libido at all, they would be alarmed or disgusted by sex.

I mean, I can envision you meeting someone with the same problem and devising ways of fucking that don't trigger your hurdle. That could be a solution.

 

[timf]

OCD can take almost anything and amplify it way out of proportion. There may also be compounding elements of guilt.

There might be some medications that could help. The only supplements I have heard of for OCD are lithium orotate and Inostitol (the former B8)

 

[Weebster]

OCD can take almost anything and amplify it way out of proportion. There may also be compounding elements of guilt.

There might be some medications that could help. The only supplements I have heard of for OCD are lithium orotate and Inostitol (the former B8)

It's strange how the ocd just sort of kicks in and ruins the whole thing when it's probably the ocd as well that makes me crave it so much.

 

[motel rooms]

I have ocd. I can't handle bad smells. Female bodies (I'm straight) that aren't fit repulse me in a sexual context. Anal anything is unthinkable to me.

Bad smells. Are oral & anal sex obligatory?

 

[Foresight]

Is your ocd therapy resistant? You need a deep dive into your relationship with the human body and pleasure. If therapy isn't for you then it needs to be done independently.

You're ultimately having sex with a human, not a blow up doll. Humans have pleasant features but also flaws, veins, scars, scents, fluids, etc. We're sacks of flesh, it's kind of gross. We need to explore our relationship with that fact.

Not liking anal is fine though. I don't like it either and my sex life is fine.

I have this really deep phobia of the circulatory system. I hate everything about blood, veins, arteries, the heart, etc. All I can do is come to terms with it. It never fully goes away.

 

[Weebster]

Bad smells. Are oral & anal sex obligatory?

Receiving oral would be pleasurable but I wouldn't demand it. Anal I would just decline. Bad smells (breath, sweat, bad hygiene) would be instantly noticeable and ruin the whole thing. Luckily, the women I've been with didn't smell.

Is your ocd therapy resistant? You need a deep dive into your relationship with the human body and pleasure. If therapy isn't for you then it needs to be done independently.

You're ultimately having sex with a human, not a blow up doll. Humans have pleasant features but also flaws, veins, scars, scents, fluids, etc. We're sacks of flesh, it's kind of gross. We need to explore our relationship with that fact.

Not liking anal is fine though. I don't like it either and my sex life is fine.

I have this really deep phobia of the circulatory system. I hate everything about blood, veins, arteries, the heart, etc. All I can do is come to terms with it. It never fully goes away.

I think on the surface people look alright if they're still youthful (legal age). I try not to think about the fact that I and other people have internal organs. Defecating will never stop being completely repulsive. I can't hear a woman I'm interested in fart or using the bathroom without being turned off forever.

 

[Judah]

Receiving oral would be pleasurable but I wouldn't demand it. Anal I would just decline. Bad smells (breath, sweat, bad hygiene) would be instantly noticeable and ruin the whole thing. Luckily, the women I've been with didn't smell.

I think that anal sex also tends to become unnecessary in a sexual encounter, many people are beginning to reject this practice due to the discomfort that it entails. As for other practices such as oral and vaginal sex, have you tried showering and using special soaps before having sex with your partner? This was commonly done when you had a partner

 

[Weebster]

I think that anal sex also tends to become unnecessary in a sexual encounter, many people are beginning to reject this practice due to the discomfort that it entails. As for other practices such as oral and vaginal sex, have you tried showering and using special soaps before having sex with your partner? This was commonly done when you had a partner

This is why I'd prefer a gf to a hookup. Fear of bad hygiene and STDs exist for me because hookups are what I can find. I can't work so that means no relationship.

 

[TotallyIsolated]

I knew someone whose trauma and aversion to sex was cured by just finding a partner they were genuinely attracted to. Easier said than done I know.

 

[motel rooms]

Receiving oral would be pleasurable but I wouldn't demand it. Anal I would just decline.

My point was that it's not necessary to have oral & anal sex. It's possible to have a satisfying sexual encounter without penetrating any bodily orifices or being penetrated by your partner.

 

[myopybyproxy]

As long as you have this hygiene-related OCD you won't feel comfortable with sex. It's actually an objectively repulsive activity. In a normal brain disgust is temporarily overridden by lust when it comes to sex, but sexual organs and emissions have most of the traits that make something disgusting. If someone had no libido at all, they would be alarmed or disgusted by sex.

I mean, I can envision you meeting someone with the same problem and devising ways of fucking that don't trigger your hurdle. That could be a solution.

this gave me a fabulous idea - he should have sex through a sheet and scented candles near him so he won't get turned off by any sweat the sheet may absorb

 

[Weebster]

this gave me a fabulous idea - he should have sex through a sheet and scented candles near him so he won't get turned off by any sweat the sheet may absorb

That's how Orthodox Jews have sex. They poke a hole in a sheet and do missionary only...from what I've heard.

 

[myopybyproxy]

That's how Orthodox Jews have sex. They poke a hole in a sheet and do missionary only...from what I've heard.

that is a myth lmaooooo

but on a more serious note, to answer the title question - alcohol, stimulants, gamma hydroxybutyrate (do not combine w alcohol unless your goal is brain damage or death)

depression has all but killed my libido, but with the right chemical tweaks i get into the mood straight away

 

[whatevs]

That's how Orthodox Jews have sex. They poke a hole in a sheet and do missionary only...from what I've heard.

It's how Franco did it too.

 

[FatalSystemError591]

Maybe it's not necessarily sex you crave, but intimacy or closeness with someone. Society force feeds us this idea that sex is the only way to be intimate and that is simply not true. You may want to look within yourself and see what aspect of sex you find appealing. I'm in pretty much the exact same boat with my OCD, a lot of it is health and hygiene related. But with me also being on the asexual spectrum and finding sex repulsive due to fluids and also trauma, I have had to have the same conversation within myself of "Okay so it's not sex I want, it's really me saying I want intimacy, respect, and to feel understood."

 

[Weebster]

Maybe it's not necessarily sex you crave, but intimacy or closeness with someone. Society force feeds us this idea that sex is the only way to be intimate and that is simply not true. You may want to look within yourself and see what aspect of sex you find appealing. I'm in pretty much the exact same boat with my OCD, a lot of it is health and hygiene related. But with me also being on the asexual spectrum and finding sex repulsive due to fluids and also trauma, I have had to have the same conversation within myself of "Okay so it's not sex I want, it's really me saying I want intimacy, respect, and to feel understood."

Nonsexual intimacy isn't really a thing anymore or it's really rare

 

[whywere]

My point was that it's not necessary to have oral & anal sex. It's possible to have a satisfying sexual encounter without penetrating any bodily orifices or being penetrated by your partner.

100% correct, as I was always told that the largest sexual organ in the human body is the brain.

Walter