When I find myself at my worst, I think the same way. Life tends to have some sort of a sadistic sense of humor. You desperately climb out of the well that is your feelings, only to be kicked back down by some sort of BS after you reach the top. I myself find that I'm becoming so tired of it all. And yet, whenever I do calm down from my sorrow and/or wrath, another reason comes to slap me in the face.
So, at least for me, I've begun to accept the cycle finally. Self-loathing to say this, perhaps, but I'm realizing that life is trying to tell me to stop trying. Why bother when you try to make any improvements to your life, only for something to swoop in and make you think it was all for naught? The cycle is cruel. The cycle is tiresome. I wish I could cope with this reality like some people. Bury it all away and make reasons as to why your life isn't so bad.
But perhaps I'm just ungrateful......
