Okay I love making dating profiles this is my time to shine haha
On Tinder it is super easy to change your Gender and Preferred Gender settings (if you can't find this, lmk I can try to help). Switch these so you are seeing
Your Gender (I am assuming you are a man but correct me if I am wrong!) from the perspective of
Your desired partner's gender (I believe you said girlfriend)
. This is going to bring up the profiles people will see along side with yours. (I try to do this every time I move to a new place, because location changes the available dating pool pretty drastically!). Just swipe
no on everyone who comes up so you don't match with them haha, but as you do, look at their profile and pictures and ask yourself a couple of questions:
-What about this person's photos makes them seem
approachable/unapproachable? What posing or subject matter makes me more interested in the person? What makes me get bored and move on?
-Did they say anything in their bio that seemed like an immediate
red flag, or did they word something in a
fun way that I can steal? (You can totally steal also haha) Do I like how they are speaking about themselves? What kind of things do they talk about?
Once you've got a good idea of the competition in the area, you can set all your settings back to normal, and use those observations to curate your account. Some suggestions off the top of my head from my many years as a straight girl on tinder:
-Muscle bros are terrifying and anyone who is like shirtless in their profile is a red flag haha. Don't get caught up on what other people in your area *look* like, this is more about how you present yourself, how you speak about yourself and about others, etc.
-Tripod is a GREAT start. I automatically swipe past anyone who doesn't look like they put time and effort into their account- I do! It's like an equivalent exchange. Put on a nice outfit or two, show off some things you're proud of or want to reference in your bio, smile
. I promise it will go over well.
-I only mention because we're on SS, a tinder bio is not the best place to "this is cringe" or "I have no friends" or "I don't know what I'm even doing here". I see that wayyyyy too much on tinder and all that communicates to me is that you're going to get self conscious in 2 days and delete your account and I'll never hear from you again. You are absolutely able to find friends and love as a suicidal person, just build a foundation first. I met my long term partner on Tinder, their account was super geeky pictures of their extensive tabletop collection and some of their favorite memes, lots of smiles. 1 or 2 weeks into serious talking they brought up wanting to confide in me about their debilitating depression and suicidality, and I felt really respected by that kind of timeline.
Sorry if that was all over the place, lmk if you have any additional questions I would LOVE to help. Good luck! oh and also I've also heard from male partners in the past that tindergold is worth the money if you're not getting a lot of hits, and it's on sale pretty frequently.
