How can I stop arousing suspicion?

[allgoodthanks]

I'm really depressed, and this is the 10th year of my depression. It started when I was 16, now I'm 26.

Since I turned 16, not a day went by when I didn't wish to stop living. I have been struggling a lot, and people around me know that I am depressed, my behavior gives all the clue of a suicidal person.

If I arrange stuff for a peaceful ctb, I'm afraid people will get suspicious, they could inform my parents or the police. How can I prevent suspicion and let others know that I'm normal? I'm depressed most of the time and I find it very difficult to enjoy life. Idk what to do.

In fact, this website is the only place in the world which feels like home. I don't feel secluded here and it feels like I'm in caring hands whenever I log on to this site.

 

[3/4Dead]

My best suggestion is to go slowly. Getting rid of things? Start with some spring cleaning, then after some time has passed move onto cleaning out some of the stuff you missed, etc, etc. Same for other planning, and purchasing of items (if you need to acquire some stuff). Try to appear better, don't have to be the happiest person who lived, people will buy it even if you're just semi-happier than usual, and don't talk explicitly about wanting to die or feeling depressed.

Wishing you the best, yo

 

[Praestat_Mori]

Idk your exact living circumstances and I also don't know which method you're planning to do. I would say as long as you live alone you can prepare almost any method without anyone else noticing it. Just go on like u do every day.

Getting rid of things? Start with some spring cleaning .......

Nobody who suggest this ever considers the fact of a failed attempt.

I would never get rid of anything before an attempt - if the attempt fails I have to buy new stuff! If the attempt was successful it's not my problem what happens with my stuff that remains on earth - we can't take anything with us to the other side.

 

[DeathSleep]

I have been struggling a lot, and people around me know that I am depressed, my behavior gives all the clue of a suicidal person.

How can I prevent suspicion and let others know that I'm normal? I'm depressed most of the time and I find it very difficult to enjoy life.

Since I think suicidal thoughts most of the time I sometimes end up saying suicidal stuff to certain people. I offset it by making up something that "I'm looking forward to". It's as simple as suggesting that I'm looking forward to a movie coming out later this month or year or whatever. By implying that I want to stick around for a future something, people think I'm relatively ok and that there's not an immediate threat that they feel they have to act on. After all my goal is to avoid hospitalization. I simply make a comment every once in awhile as though I have at least a short term future to throw off suspicion.

This is what I do. I don't over do it because that would seem weird for people who know me. I just drop a clue for them every now and then. You can try it out and see if it works for you. I've actually used this quite successfully considering how often I say suicidal shit. (I just can't help but talk about it to some people. I need to stop doing that.)