Hi friends! Can I have some advice please?

[Cupcake]

So, my heart broke a little more today, or maybe a lot more, and I feel truly ready to CTB. I nearly opened my bottle of SN today, but chickened out at the last minute because of stupid SI, and also because I realized I have one more affair I haven't dealt with yet. This is where I hope you lovely folks can come in and help me with your words of wisdom.



So, recently I got a settlement from getting hit by a car. In total, I got nineteen thousand, and I'm down to about seventeen thousand now.



I'd like to die within the month, if all goes well, but I'd like to leave my partner and our three kids with the money from the settlement.



I don't have a will written because I don't really have anything to give. I was flat broke before I got the settlement, so, really, all I have to give them is the seventeen grand, and I don't know if that's really worth writing a will for. What do you guys think? What would you do?



My partner and I don't have a joint account, so I was wondering, if I go to the bank and ask to take out all seventeen grand in cash, will I have to fill out any paperwork because it is such a large amount of money? Will the bankers ask me questions about why I am taking out such a large amount of money? Are they allowed to do that?



If so, how should I answer their questions without giving my plan away. I thought about telling them I have a terminal illness and want to take out the cash for my family in case something happens to me, but I don't know if they will buy it.



I've never had such a large amount of money before, so I don't know how it all works. The most I ever had is a little over two thousand.



I can't give my partner access to my account because he is on DSHS benefits and if they know he's gotten extra money, he'll lose everything. So this is why I'd like to just leave it for him in cash.



My plan is to leave it in a hidden place he won't find right away and then leave him a note of where he can find it when I'm gone.



I'm under the impression that, if I don't take out the money in cash, the state will take half of it, which won't leave my family with very much in the end. I'd like to avoid that if possible.



Any comments/words of wisdom is much appreciated. I really think I have reached a milestone today! I think I'm really ready to go!



I'm scared to die, but I'm also scared of continuing on also, so yeah… it sucks all the way for sure.



By the way, this is not a good-bye thread, so please don't ban me mods. I'll let you know when to ban my account, or I'll just self-ban.



Thank you, and thanks also for getting this site back up. I was really worried when it was down last week.



Cheers,



Cupcake

 

[FriendofDeath]

I was going to start by saying you should draw up a will, but I see you said this would mess up your partner's benefits. I don't know that there would be anything special you'd have to do to take out that amount of cash, but is there any way you can just start taking it out slowly? How do you bank? Do you have an ATM card or checks or deal with a teller? Just seems like the best bet. I don't know what your daily limit is if you do ATM. I know I've been able to take out $600. I know you mentioned you'd like to ctb within a month, so don't know if you have the time.

Do you have family outside your partner and kids? If you aren't legally together (and I just mean a piece of paper), then is there any danger of anyone stepping forward once you are gone and trying to get the money? If there is, you should put something in writing.

Can you tell your partner you think it's a good idea to start a rainy day fund, and start putting cash aside? Maybe you could put some there and keep the rest in another place so they won't be too suspicious. then leave them the note about where the rest is hidden. Just thinking out loud here...

 

[Brick In The Wall]

Cupcake! It's been a long time, I'm sorry that you're still struggling.

If you go to take out all the money they're definitely going to ask questions. It might be best to withdraw smaller portions over time if you don't want to be scrutinized.

Even if you leave said money to your partner they need to be careful how they spend it. I'd imagine most of it would go to funeral expenses. But if it's spent any other way the tax man is gona want his slice.

Ultimately it's your money and you can withdraw it all anytime. Some banks may penalize you for doing so though. If you're not legally married and there's no will then chances are that the bank or government will keep it all.

 

[Cupcake]

Cupcake! It's been a long time, I'm sorry that you're still struggling.

If you go to take out all the money they're definitely going to ask questions. It might be best to withdraw smaller portions over time if you don't want to be scrutinized.

Even if you leave said money to your partner they need to be careful how they spend it. I'd imagine most of it would go to funeral expenses. But if it's spent any other way the tax man is gona want his slice.

Ultimately it's your money and you can withdraw it all anytime. Some banks may penalize you for doing so though. If you're not legally married and there's no will then chances are that the bank or government will keep it all.

Hi guys! Thanks for your thoughtful replies.



No, we aren't married. I didn't ever marry him b/c it would have messed up the social security benefits I receive for being blind. That's why I thought that, if I gave him the money all in cash, no one could take it from him because he could just say it was all gone or something. And, my mom, who is always trying to interfere with our lives, wouldn't be able to take it, either, because it would be hidden away for only him to find.



It's kind of funny how I used to long for more money before my settlement. Now that it's here, it's starting to become a real pain in the ass!



I also used to think that having money would make me not want to CTB anymore, but I guess the saying really is true about how money really doesn't buy happiness. I never believed it until now.



But, you're right, the people at the bank probably would question me. Maybe I should really just take it out in smaller amounts. I can take out a thousand a day from the ATM. Then I wouldn't have to deal with anybody, hopefully.



Brick In The Wall, it is so nice to hear from you! Sorry I stopped writing you back, I've really been struggling with severely fluctuating moods. I have bipolar, and it's been all over the damn place lately.



How are you holding up?